When did you start growing your hair out? How did the people around you react?
I did my big chop in December of 2011. The general reaction during my first year was “what are you doing with your hair?” not because people genuinely wanted to know but because they didn’t like how it was growing. You’d be surprised how many people find type 4 kinky hair distasteful. So many people still perpetuate curl envy and believe anything that doesn’t curl shouldn’t be shown. People have called my hair dry even when it was moisturized—I learned dry-looking hair is different than hair actually being dry. People have felt my hair and told me I need to do a deep condition even though I do one every week—because my hair is coarse, it will always feel wiry even though I know the difference between feeling dry and being dry.
I still get some of that to this day. My mom doesn’t even like when I have my fro out. It still offends me but since it’s been going on for a while, I’ve developed a thick skin toward comments like that. Generally, I’ll ignore them, but sometimes I want to curse the person out.
How do you maintain your look?
I wear twist-outs and Bantu-knot-outs mostly after Wash Day. After clarifying with ACV, removing the build-up with Shea Moisture’s Purification Masque, and deep conditioning, I put on some leave-in conditioner and my homemade Love Shea shea butter to seal then twist my hair up. The next day I’ll take it out and rock it a few days before I have to refresh it. Wearing fros for years now is the exact reason I’m bored with them and am now in loc extensions.
Do you have any favorite products or hair tools that you would recommend to other men out there?
Most of the products I use are the same as other naturals regardless of gender. I know men are lazy and don’t like a lot of steps in their routine—me too—but it’s all necessary for healthy long hair. I tell people all the time to experiment with products first before settling on any as staples in their routine. What works for many may not work for you—found that out with coconut oil the hard way.
Disregarding specifics, every man should invest in a spray bottle, a moisturizing shampoo and conditioner, a leave-in conditioner, a great deep conditioner, a styling cream, and a wide-tooth comb. For me, I love refreshing my hair with a mix of water and aloe vera juice. I don’t shampoo. I do a monthly ACV rinse. But great moisturizing shampoos and conditioners would be Trader Joe’s Tea Tree Tingle and Giovanni’s 50:50 Balance and their Smooth As Silk. A great clarifying shampoo is Shea Moisture’s African Black Soap Deep Cleansing Shampoo. My favorite leave-in conditioners are Giovanni’s Direct Leave-In and Shea Moisture’s Thickening Growth Milk. I make my own Deep Treatment Masque—video on my YouTube channel. But I like Camille Rose’s Blue Algae Deep Conditioner, Shea Moisture’s Anti Breakage Masque for fine hair, and their Curl Enhancing Smoothie.
The Anti-Breakage Masque is too much for my thick hair, but after using it I can tell you it works at thickening hair and making it stronger. I also don’t use the Curl Enhancing Smoothie because my hair hates anything coconut that isn’t rinse-out and the smell makes me sick. As far as styling creams, raw organic shea butter will do. I suggest avocado or olive oil for people with type 3 curly hair because butter tends to weigh it down. Some other favorite oils of mine are sweet almond, apricot, castor oil, and Jamaican black castor oil for sealing and my scalp.
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