I agree...sounds like porous hair (mine is porous). My daughter is very low porosity--she can be under the shower head for a a couple of minutes and STILL walk out with pieces of dry hair. When we put product in her hair it never works just to put it on (like smooth it on) or it won't absorb and she'll be white haired for several hours before it soaks in. I usually kind of squeeze product into her hair and that works excellently.
The thing about liking slip that RCC said and a few others is that their hair tangles more and so the slip prevents that. This is so true with my daughter's..but not my son's hair. I swear we can detangle in the shower with tons of conditioner and from the time she steps out and dries off to the time that she puts leave in on her hair its already tangled. A number of products don't work for her because of the slip factor--her condish and leave in must be as slippery as possible to prevent the tangles.
It may entirely be the strength of the curl pattern. I mean my daughter and I are really both 2C/3A types but her curl pattern is much stronger AND she tangles very easily...mine is weaker, requires much encouragement and doesn't tangle at all pretty much ever. I comb/brush my hair maybe 2-3x per year tops. There's no need. It's always been like this.
I have so enjoyed reading the responses on this...this is really interesting!
Oh and I find grab sort of similar almost to glue in the hair--pulls hairs together and keeps them together vs. being slippery so that each strand is coated. Hope that helps. WC40 I agree--things that help clump are what I see as that kind of grabby feeling--because when things for me have too much slip it is as if each strand does its own thing..I end up with barely wavy hair that is stringy or at least not clumpy.
The odd thing is that CJ Curl Rehab does not have a lot of slip for me..my daughter was the same way. Seems weird as so many say it has lots of slip.
I normally find that condish with BTMS in the top 3-5 ingredients have more slip..but it's not always true.