My mentality is narrow because I was born and raised among white people and culture. The middle school and high school I went to were private institutions schooling many wealthy and upper class people. All my girlfriends were of European descent, and I'm simply not attracted to "ethnic" people. I find that lighter people are more beautiful because they are lighter, the traits stick out, they are more heaven like as opposed to the darkness. The whole reason of having long hair was to distance myself as much as possible from being seen as ethnic, but in the end I'll always be an ethnic no matter how hard I try. I think I'll have to accept wearing a hat everywhere I go, but there's no escape.

I'm sorry if these ideas offend anyone, it's the culture and people I was raised in and around. I mean, just think of the words people use and the subliminal effect they have on people's outlook. Every time I get my hair trimmed the stylist will say I have thick and coarse hair. Compare the words thick and coarse to thin and fine, there is a difference in connotation no matter how subtle it is.

And why would I only want people of European descent to be attracted to me, because I am attracted to them and eventually would want my children to look like them, and the only way for that to even happen among a still small probability because of the genes I carry, is to reproduce with a carrier of those qualities. It runs deep in my head.
Originally Posted by voidofidea
Yep. You're been shaped into, and let your self be shaped into, sadly, a beauty bigot. You obviously see that given your admission, and your next step could be (dare I say should be) to work on that. Light and darkness as metaphors do not apply to human beings in the way you apply it. It's destructive.

If anything, as a Christian, I realize the first man (and by extension woman) (and yes, this is my philosophy/cosmic belief which you may not share) were made from the earth, so it's doubtful they were white. If anything, "earthy" is a better appellation. The Christ was born a Jew, so he was not white. Does this mean anything in terms of race? Not really. God is color-blind. It has to do with the idea, for me, that the most perfect man ever was indubitably a man of color, and the second most perfect man was an "ethnic" by designation. (Ethnic technically applies to whites as well, so it's a weird way we use the word today colloquiially.)

Quite frankly, how anyone could look at someone like Aldis Hodge (the hot computer geek from LEVERAGE) or Rachel True or Tetsuji Tamayama (Asian hottie from Nana and Nana2) or Rosario Dawson or Iman and think they're not beautiful cause they're not "Euro White" looking....okay, unbelievable. Just unbelievable. What a small beauty box that is.

Your issues run far deeper than hair. I am biracial. I'm FAT. Big, big FAT. I'm Hispanic, and for a while in my childhood, I lived in a white neighborhood where the local Irish gang picked on me and my family--robbed us, berated us--and called me **** on my way to school.

So, I know about not fitting in. However, the problems now are not about them but about you, and really, that's something only YOU can work on and fix. I hope you do. Self-loathing is a bad, bad thing. I've seen more than one gal do surgical and cosmetic alterations to look white.

Now, that said--being frizzy-curly, having bad teeth, having zits, being fat, and having very poor and uneducated parents who couldn't give me socio-economic advantages (we lived in the "ghetto, but my parents and kin were amazingly loving and hardworking and kind), I nevertheless had enough spark and smarts to attract all kinds of guys. My husband is white (Irish-German-Hungarian) and tall and good-looking. He's madly in love with ME. Fat, unpretty, ethnic, biracial ME. ME. My spirit, mind and soul were enough to get me attention from black, Hispanic, and yes, Euro-white men (blue-eyed, green-eyed, hazel-eyed, blonde, etc).

If you look around the media, you'll see all sorts of ethnic women married to all sorts of men. Love sees through all that crap.

Real love isn't limited by hair or skin color. Trust me. If they love you, they love YOU, and if they can't love you as you are naturally, then really, what is that? It ain't love.

When you learn to look at yourself with kinder eyes, you'll be more lovable. Oh, yeah. And do that before you reproduce. If your kids end up looking just like you, will you loathe them? Think about it...no guarantee your kids will look like a white spouse. None at all. Learn to love you, so you will eventually not have any obstacle to loving those just like you.

And maybe browse these pics: Spin Off: Post pictures of 3c hair
I don't know how you can look at those ladies and not see beauty. All of them have your hair type--3c as you've said.
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Last edited by MirCurls; 04-07-2010 at 12:53 PM.