If your hair is hard when dried, it could be due to build up. What products are you using?
Also a little castor oil layered right over my conditioner helps a lot. I focus on the ends. Another product that's been keeping my dry hair soft through day 2-3 is Karen's Body Beautiful Hair Nectar. I apply a little after conditioner rinse out and before a leave in and gel.
I actually use product more frequently on dry hair since I only wash every 2-4 days. If I'm refreshing/fluffing up a wash and go or need to defrizz the ends - Devacurl Set it Free mixed with Botanical Spirits Avocado Coconut Milk Hair butter or QB Burdock Root Butter cream. I may touch up the ends with Botanical Spirits Soft curls cream or Afroveda Curl Define, both of which can be used on dry hair. If I dry twist or do dry bantu knots my hair likes Karen's Body Beautiful Hair nectar or straight Devacurl Set it Free, a few sprays per section. I use more KBB -- it sinks into my porous hair.