Join Date: Jun 2006
Yay for opening on Willow and Tara being cute together! Boo for the brief reminder in dialogue that Willow "can't" do magic anymore. It's like you want me to hate you for taking my Badass Willow away. Hm, Willow gets points for her disdainful tone, but "Empire of the Nerds" is waaayyy too important-sounding to apply to the trio, even in jest. OMG, Dawn's hyper squeaky joy at seeing Willow and Tara back together is hilarious. It's like the energy she was made of came from the hearts of fanatical shippers! Dude, should I start calling them the contrived trio? They left all their plans behind, yet they took the time to rig the whole house to start chopping itself up. Of course it didn't get Buffy, though. It just slashed the stomach of her sweet red leather jacket, for which they must pay. I don't get why Dawn's telling Spike, "If you wanted to hurt Buffy, congratulations" - it's not like he knew the camera was there. Xander at least was in a murderous rage when he accused Anya of trying to hurt him despite the fact that she didn't know the camera was there either. So the idiot trio was questing for a pair of balls. Subtle. OMFG Xander, stop being an ass to Buffy. You don't get to scold her for sleeping with Spike. And even though it shut Buffy down, just think for a moment about the response you gave when she pointed out that you fought side by side with Spike while she was gone and "let him take care of Dawn," a child left in your collective care: "But I never forgot what he was." WTF, THEN WHY DID YOU LEAVE HIM ALONE WITH THE HELPLESS KID. Stop talking, man. You're going to hit mantle if you keep digging.
Yay Tara! "But what about the trio's evil scheme?" she says, pitching her voice lower and making a face because those fools are no real concern, even with their giant saws and cameras and such. My name for this band of ninnies is so totally canon. How exactly did Spike get to the door to Buffy's bathroom without anyone being all, "Hey, Spike's here"? Also, this is a rather awkward place to have a conversation. Huh. Spike now says that "trust is for old marrieds," but we had a whole episode awhile back that kept looping back to him asking Buffy if she trusted him. It obviously mattered to him then. How little does continuity matter when writing Spike? It's like when he declared, "I don't hurt you," to Buffy and she was chastened and the show seemed to agree with him. Really? There's no way that sentence can even be defended as true in a debate without ending in "as much as you hurt me" or "as much as I hurt myself." Wow, Spike, you are like a field full of red flags: "You love me." Dude, there is a reason those aren't the three little words they say a woman wants to hear. That kind of talk gives Rapey Riley a run for his money. Stop grabbing at Buffy. I'm starting to feel creeped out by having brought up that nickname. Owww, oh man, Buffy, I think it would've killed a non-super-powered person to fall and slam their head on the edge of the tub like that! Oh my God, Spike, "Let yourself love me"? And not with your usual frustration but a lilting tone that makes me want to shove you into a padded cell? Poor Buffy has a head injury and I am officially very unhappy to have brought up that nickname.
HOLY HELL GET OFF OF HER. WHAT YOU ARE ATTEMPTING IS ACTUAL RAPE. Why did I mention "Rapey" anything? Why? Why?? Ohgodohgodohgodohgod too real too scary no more realism in this scene please where are Willow and Tara and Dawn don't make this happen. Yes, good, kick him the hell across the room! Great use of superstrength, Buffy! Ugh, yeah, Spike, I bet you feel real bad now that you've apparently remembered that rape is bad. You know what's way worse than the guilt from committing attempted rape? Getting sexually assaulted. If it was time for him to be a villain again, couldn't he just have had his chip give out?
So it's established now that the blond one has the hots for Warren? What with him proclaiming it hot when Warren killed the demon earlier and his fierce loyalty to him. The Jonathan-exlusion dialogue from the beginning of the episode seems to give the pair a mutual romantic subtext, too, and Warren obviously cares too much for Blondie to shove him through a barrier like he did Jonathan. Maybe Warren is so bad with the ladies because he needs to admit that his preference is for dweeby little blond-haired dudes. Maybe that punch to the face that sent Xander flying so far should've killed him, but whatever, main characters are made of tougher stuff in this universe. Really, Spike? "Why did I do it?" took one second to turn into "What has she done to me?" YOU tried to rape HER. She did not do something to you to make you try to rape her. That's impossible and I don't like that it's been allowed to come out of your mouth without anyone making you eat it. You're also wrong about the chip not letting you "be a monster." It was apparently just fine with letting you be a rapist, or you were content to ignore its shocks. Either way, Drusilla may have had a point with her ridiculous "electricity loies" bit.
Jonathan, I'm pretty sure Blondie wasn't talking about the power balls when he said he couldn't wait "to get [his] hands on his orbs." His "NOOO!" when the rocks fell on Warren should tip you off as well. Good boy, Jonathan, though telling Buffy about the orbs won't absolve you of your sins. While Warren's "Say goodnight, b*tch" is just as lame as everything else he does, Buffy's triumphant "Goodnight, b*tch" was predictable, yet satisfying. Blondie knocking himself out is also a nice choice. Not as nice as freaking killing Warren already, of course. Really, Blondie? Really? You're crying about how Warren was just using you and "never really loved - hangingoutwithus." What? Are you kidding me? He's trying to duck back into the closet? Did his homosexual subtext get ramped up to text just for this episode solely for the purpose of giving him a way to reach in vain for the viewers' heartstrings at the end? It's not like anyone liked him enough to feel bad for him. I won't even call him by his name because you used my brother's name for him and that mess just won't fly with me. You can't just wave your wand of stupid and say, "Yep, Blondie was just in wuv and we already think we've succeeded in making Jonathan look good, so Warren's the only problem." If this means Warren will die soon, then I'm glad for that, but this was all just SO poorly done. BTW, you left Blondie too calm while Warren hit on that girl earlier if Warren was making romantic promises to him. I'm not surprised you half-assed that, too.
Speaking of poorly done: Xander's actor dropped the ball when he was about to rush away from Buffy's bathroom. Don't try to distract me by having Buffy refer to the cameras as "evil trio cameras" and having Xander admit obliquely to being an ass, we are talking about this. His "son of a b*tch" sounded more whiny than infuriated by the attack on his friend. I've also noticed him falling flat with strong serious emotions when he talks about leaving Anya at the altar. There were enough of those moments that it makes sense, assuming you don't have time to send a main cast member to acting classes, not to drag shooting down by trying to pull something genuine out of him. However, ignoring this problem stops making practical sense when the scene in question will not be repeated, should impact him deeply and only requires such a strong burst of emotion for a few short words. He wasn't even facing the camera at the time - you could've had him record "son of a b*tch" in studio later until he got it right! Yes, I am harping on this instead of addressing Spike's attempted rape of Buffy. It was so obviously thrown in for drama, like attempted rape is just something you pull out to spice things up. He didn't need anything else to drive him to get rid of that chip at this point in his arc. Your audience would have understood Spike's motivation in that choice after the events of last episode, and you could've trusted that your writing would have adequately convinced them that he is no longer Cuddly!Spike. Could've, should've...wait. Spuffies still exist after having watched that scene. If that is so, then the show can't have gone on to properly cast him out of grace for this.
Oops, sort of left the window and assumed that was the end. Got more show to watch.
OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD TARA. OH MY GOD NO. NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! THAT DID NOT HAPPEN. WARREN DID NOT BRING A GUN AND TARA DID NOT NO NO NO NO NO BAD NO. THIS IS NOT THE WAY TO BRING BADASS WILLOW BACK.
This was fake. Tell me this didn't happen. It didn't it didn't it didn't it DID NOT HAPPEN. Tara is NOT dying from a stray bullet fired by Warren. Her last words will NOT be a confused "Your shirt" looking at the spray of her own blood on Willow. That came from a different show and needs to be a nightmare and not real. They just got back together and Willow just had an oddly timed nightmare that expresses a deep-seated fear that their happiness won't last.
It. Did. Not. Actually. HAPPEN.
...It's a siggie
Last edited by wild_sasparilla; 10-29-2011 at 07:42 AM.
Reason: More show to watch