Yeah, seriously, you are beautiful and have gorgeous hair!
Ok, couple suggestions - some you may already be doing, but given I have dry tangly hair, maybe you can find something useful in here.
I only detangle in the shower. I low-poo or co-wash, depending on what my hair needs, then coat my hair in condish. I put it up in a clip and then wash my face, shave, etc. Then I take it back down, and let the water flow over one side of it, which sort of helps to pull my hair into the right position, and then detangle with a wide-tooth comb working from the ends up. Sometimes I have to add a little more condish. Then I add a heavier RO over it, sometimes I'll wait a couple minutes, and then partially rinse it out.
Out of the shower, I use LI, and then add stylers.
At least once a week I do a DT, taking my heaviest condish(es), and mix in some EVOO, coconut oil, sometimes some ACV, honey, or any combo of those.
I also sometimes do coconut oil pre-poos, especially if I'm going to clarify, which I find sometimes helps with tangles, too. I also usually do the CWC method when I'm going to low-poo. (that's "condition wash condition", where you put condish on the length of your hair, then low-poo, then condition again.)
Also, do you do PT's? If you have over-processing, that can be very helpful.
Good luck! I know it's frustrating. I left the house feeling pretty happy with my refreshed curls today, but by the time I got home they were a dry frizzy tangled mess. :/