Trying to answer as many questions here -
Yes he's in public school. In Kindergarten he was evaluated by the ACES program and was observed in class and had one on one time with a counselor thru that program weekly, that seemed to help - but funding was dramatically cut to that program and it is full this year with kids that "are worse than he is" as they put it. Nice, huh.
I haven't addressed this yet with his pediatrician - that is next week and I will be asking for an evaluation with a child psychologist that may be able to identify ADHD or some other type of processing disorder.
His teacher emails us sometimes and sometimes doesn't. We've stressed the importance of communication with her so I truly hope she isn't just dropping the ball here.
His stuff has a place and always has. He has a bucket in his room for shoes, his own hamper, and he knows his stuff goes to his room. It just doesn't always make it there without me taking it myself because he is all over the place. He doesn't seem to care that his stuff has it's own spot.
I wish I could identify when he's "tempted to lie" but he has lied to me straight faced when I already knew the truth and if I didn't know it already, I would've believed him. So I can't tell when he's lying or not. He's an excellent liar.
He seems to work better on structure - like bedtime is bedtime, period, it's always been 8 to 8:30 and he sleeps like a rock at the end of each day, like it just exhausts him to live. He does get to run around - he has soccer practice once a week, he has a big yard at his dad's house, but at mine I feel like he gets shorted a bit because we live in a crappy neighborhood in a trailer park with 15 feet between us and the next trailer and not a lot of room to move. Our evenings seem so hurried sometimes when I don't get him picked up till 5:30 then it's dinner-shower-review schoolwork-bedtime all so fast. Weekends are more relaxed and fun. His diet is like that of an average 7 year old picky eater. Not horribly unhealthy but not vegan or fruits and veggies 24/7 either.
He LOVES soccer and begged to play it so I think he enjoys it, just doesn't know how to/doesn't have the capacity to play well with others yet. It's ironic to me because I've never seen him have a meltdown in an actual game - maybe because he has a goal he's working towards? Not sure.
He does do well with Legos - he got a racecar lego set for Easter and sat down and flipped through the booklet and built the car all by himself by reading the instructions. His mind just works that way, I guess. He was also uninterrupted while building it.
I have read up on symptoms of ADHD and grew up with an ADHD younger brother and it all seems to fit my son. I know less about sensory integration but his thing about hearing and noise and "headaches" while distracted bugs me. We have no Montessori based schools around here (SMALL town 50 minutes away from a Target even) and homeschooling is not an option as both of us parents work full time, his stepmom works full time, my SO works full time and none of us can afford to give that up. Nor do I have the patience it requires to be an effective teacher. I wish I could afford to put him in our private catholic school here just to see if it's structured differently and would make a difference but I barely crack the poverty limits and unfortunately cannot.
I'm interested in what his pedi has to say next week.