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Old 05-02-2012, 12:46 PM   #22
Xyz
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 1,913
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Quote:
Originally Posted by legends View Post
I don't know that many women who are that dumb, but I do know a LOT of women who act...not dumb, exactly, but they do tone themselves down when they're around men. They don't talk about the same things, or they don't talk about things in the same way that they usually do--less detail, less intense, less acerbic, etc.
Yes in the case of this particular guy I've noticed that he has plenty of women who cook and buy him clothing or other gifts and giggle and tell him how stellar he is. Shakes head.

When he talked to me about 'helping him with his nails,' I said, 'Oh no, you have to pay to get a manicure.' He started telling me about his female friends who invite him over and do his hair and his nails for him. Again, I just shook my head. I understand that these type of women exist. I don't understand why some men would try to push all women to be like that. They should hold on to those generous types like they're gold but instead they harass others. And I'm the b-word?

My ex and I went through this when we first became friends. He said it hurt his feelings that I didn't like him the way he liked me, so he started criticizing everything I did. I guess he thought that would make me realize I needed a man - ie, him. Or else he was trying to convince himself that I was trash and verbalizing it helped.

I'm trying to figure out if there is a way to head off the emasculation so I don't have to hear about it. Marah, what are you doing that works? My female friends will sometimes berate my male friends who act very needy or bosy. But they do it by being very loud and getting in the guy's faces, which leads my male friends to just laugh later and claim that women are emotional. I go more for the talk rationally approach, but it's tedious and I'd love something quick and painless.

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