I'm sorry. That sucks. I would need to remove myself from the emotional feelings I would have in that situation before I'd be able to discuss it rationally. Feelings that come from being mislead, and the distrust, and the fact that you had to find these yourself.
I do not believe that porn is cheating. That's like saying masturbation is cheating. But if other things are going on, or its excessive and other needs aren't being met, that's different.
Regardless of her sexual orientation, its something that makes you uncomfortable, and clearly he knows that he's doing something wrong or else he wouldn't be hiding it.
This particular instance I wouldn't think would be something to divorce over, but only you know what goes on intimately in your relationship. Good luck.
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