First, clarify. You have to start on really clean hair.
When I was having this problem, I also made sure the cuticle of my hair was open, by sitting under a heating cap for 10 minutes and then applying a good moisturizing conditioner. It seemed to take better.
Elle Pixie's blog http://www.questfortheperfectcurl
had a video with hair conditioner recs. I opted for her Dominican conditioner rec: Crecio Pelo
. It's available at BSS where Dominican products are sold, totally affordable. I really like this conditioner and have put it in my rotation.
As others have mentioned: AO Honeysuckle Rose is a bet. I also get results from doctoring Tresemme Naturuals Nourishing with the following ingredients, EVOO, honey, baby banana, full fat yogurt and wheat germ oil. You don't need to add a lot of these ingredients. A Tablesppon max of the EVOO, 2 T yogurt and baby banana, 1/2 teaspoon of wheat germ oil (it's very oily so be careful). I try to keep the intergrity of the conditioner and just pump it up a little.
I also like Talijah Wahjid's Herbal Enhancing Conditioner, it's yellow. It mixes well with other things.
And just plain EVOO and honey warmed and mixed.
Just make sure you clean your hair to get rid of any product build-up and do try opening the cuticle first with either a heating cap, under a hooded dryer, a hair steamer or warm hot towels and immediately applying conditioner.
You may have to condition your hair again the next wash, but you won't have to clarify for several washes.
See what happens.