Hi Bookworm, sorry I don't have any useful advice as I have the exact same problem. But I can relate to what you say about forcing hair to be straight when it didn't want to be straight and now spending way too much time forcing it be curly!! Its a conundrum (sp?). All I want is consistency, too.
Wave, fine, medium texture, color-treated, porous
Lo Poo: DevaCurl Lo Poo
CO Wash: VO5 Kiwi Lime
Condish: Tressemme Naturals Moist and GCP CB
Leave in: (experimenting but like KCKT)
Styling Combos: SS CEJ add SS FHG, KCKT and KCCC
Experimenting with: Suave Captivating Curls Mouse
Techniques: Icequeen, Smasters
Hair Dislikes: glycerin!!