I'm really sorry you are going through this. Unfortunately, this comes with the territory of going natural in a world full of people who do not appreciate their own natural beauty. You are brave for going it alone so to speak.
You really need to stand up for yourself. TELL THEM OFF. Even if they are your family and friends. You made a decision and the only one who should care about your hair is YOU.
Do you feel great about the condition of your hair? Is it well moisturized and looking its best to your liking? Are you confident in wearing it short and natural? If you are, then you really NEED to tell all those people to have a seat. I know it's not easy (I didn't have to do it myself, so I understand the easier said than done bit). If it's not in the best condition, work on that, but still tell them to STFUAHAS!!!!
Try to tune them out. There's really no how to on this. It's gonna be rough, but you'll make it. It's terrible what black folks do to other black folks--I mean you just saw what happened with Gabby Douglas and she's relaxed!
Be you, do you, love yourself.
Family (SOs and friends as well) can be theeee worst! Just remember, all the hate they are spewing at you tells you MORE about THEM than it does about YOU. It's their problem not yours (it doesn't seem like it because you are the one suffering, but it is). It will pass.
NC is a good place. Us type 4s stick together, so you will find acceptance here, even when you don't out there. I know it hurts, but it will pass.