I know how you feel. My curls aren't EXTREMELY tight, I mean I do have "Afro" hair, but it's curly.
No nice way to put that so I'll put it down..
Anyway, I'm a big fan of curl activators. Long Aid is my gel of choice. They keep your hair super moist, so it's softened and defined, but it also makes your hair wet and sticky. I'm still looking for a product that gives me those results with a cleaner feel, but it's a quick fix.
😜🍸Sent LIVE from my JPhone 4s using some CurlTalk app. 😜🍸