I don't have kids, or type 4 hair, but I do follow the Chocolate Hair Vanilla Care blog. It's written by a Caucasian mama who has adopted an African-American child. Their products and routines over the years are all there, as are styling how to videos and just general lifestyle posts. I've even learned a few things I can apply to my own routine. You might have a look there for anything you can incorporate.
CG since 11/2011
2c /3a F /Mii, low porosity

Winter Products /Routine:
Clarifying: Herbal Essences Tealightfully Clean
Low Poo: Renpure Luxurious Argan Oil
Co-washes: Suave Naturals Tropical Coconut or Daily Clarifying
RO:
Tresemme Expert Selection Perfectly (un)Done, Cure Care, Suave Tropical Coconut or Daily Clarifying
LI (if needed):
Tresemme Perfectly (un)Done, Renpure Brazilian Keratin Straightening (old formula), Cure Care
Stylers: HETT, AIF
PT: IAGirl's as needed