Trim doesn't help me either. And "clarifying" makes it 10x worse. Right now I'm actually afraid of clarifying cleanser!
Lately it seems like the dry ends on my "canopy" are creeping up my hair, and I have so many knots and tangles it's impossible not to tear some hair. It's as though my hair gets to a certain length and turns into twisted "barbwire".
One thing I've learned (for my hair) is to be careful with layers of gel and/or curl creams; especially styler that contains glycerin and/or proteins.When I'm doing 3rd/4th day hair, additional layers of product can destroy my hair, even if they are glycerin/protein free.
When the weather is really dry, I have to suck it up and wet my whole head way more often, and I have to remove product several times a week (rinse or co-wash). The longer I wait to rinse the layers of product, the more dried-out my canopy gets. The drier it gets, the more it turns into uneven rough clumps. If my hair wasn't layered I'd love to do dreadlocks, but I can't even gets twists to work right at this point.