Hair is fine, medium or coarse texture. High, average or low porosity. So, your hair isn't "more coarse than porous." Only reason I point this out is that it will help people give you help if they (and you) understand your properties. Here's a link that will help you if you haven't read this information Live Curly Live Free - Curly Hair Basics
It's possible that if you get the protein/moisture balance correct, your curl pattern will strengthen and you won't need the hold products, as much. The length, and therefore the weight, of your hair could be pulling out the curl.
A good haircut is the foundation for everything else. If you don't have long layers to "lighten" the weight and help your curls--that would be a good place to start. Next is the treatments. You need to make sure you hair is moist enough and has the right amount of protein. Next is the products. Depending where you live, the dewpoint is dropping--more moisture and, therefore, more layers.
Styling comes next. You may want to try something like plopping to help your curls start to "set" without the weight dragging them down. Then you would scrunch out the water with a CLU towel or cotton teeshirt--helps develop curl and reduce water weight. Finally, you can diffuse a little to harden the cast of the gel type product--and hold the curl while your hair dries. Last, and really important--don't touch your hair until it's completely dry. If you destroy the cast, the gel doesn't support your curl. Since I don't know your porosity, if it's more low then medium, it will take it a really long time to dry--even with the curl towels and some diffusing. You'll pull out the curl if you don't wait for it to be completely dry.
3a (Corkicelli), highlighted, fine, low porosity
modified CG, since April '07
CG since 3/11/08
HGs: Curly Kinks Satin Roots, Curlycue ReNew and Coil Jam; homemade FSG and okra gel; soap bars; DM MiraCurls Curling Gelly; UFD Curly Magic; Shescentit LIs; Sevi conditioners; Botanical Spirits Puree, CJ Repair Me