My second day hair is flatter and more frizzy - there isn't anything I can do about it. I've just come to think of it as an alternative style to my first day hair. I even prefer first day hair that is still dampish since I have better curl definition.
The key to happy hair is realizing that it won't always be perfect, but it is great, and it is yours!
As far as dryness goes, I haven't solved that problem yet myself. I put oil in my CO wash, and I oil seal, but my hair always looks dry. I think it has somewhat to do with the color. Blonde hair just doesn't reflect light the way dark hair does. My hair is in great condition. It is tailbone length when pulled straight, and I don't have any split ends because I never comb, brush unless slathered with slippery conditioner, nor do I heat style. But I still can't get really shiny hair - so it can look dry.