I think I'd rather sleep in a muddy ditch on a cold rainy night than sleep on those sheets.

Really.

I cannot sleep on microfiber or flannel or fleece or any of those soft/warm/synthetic things. I must must MUST have cold snappy COTTON percale sheets. Or silk charmeuse. Anything with polyester burns me. Anything that doesn't feel cold to the touch makes me insane. My mother always sends me flannel sheets. I've been forced to sleep on them while visiting her house. Made me want to blow my head off.