Hmmm, I think I'm a fairly diplomatic person, but these matters are sensitive and I'd hate to a) continue to send the wrong signal (if that's the case), or b) give him the impression that I'm full of myself (if I'm misreading the situation).

So, I might arrange to meet with him at 1 on Tuesday for tea, and when he arrives tell him that I have somewhere else to be in about an hour or so.

I think his reaction to your time limit and how the interaction feels over the next hour can give you a little more insight into his feelings.

I tend to suss things out before I make any hard and fast decisions on what to do.
- Seek first to understand, then to be understood.
- Character is how you treat those who can do nothing for you.