This sounds like me and one of my childhood friends. I started accepting my curly hair a lot sooner than her. When she saw my hair she would always ask for advice, but I think she was also reluctant to spend a lot of time/money learning how to care for her curls. One christmas or birthday I just mailed her the curly girl book--she no longer lives in the same town as me--and I've started to notice her wearing her hair down and curly much more often. Change takes time but if you plant the seeds it will eventually happen.
The product kit is a good idea too.