I understand your frustration I'm sort of in the same situation. I think I might have 3a potential but so far I just get 2c curls then again my hair is damaged from years of flat ironing and dyeing my hair I'd say bout 10+. The back tends to be really limp its hard to get my hair fully coated with products cause it's thick and I have a lot. I think the most important part is the right haircut which I'm in the hunt for since hair that is weigh down wont curl as nice. After that its just trial and error till you find something that fits also try and stick to one routine for a while before trying something else your hair might just need time to adjust. Ive been told its important to know and read what works for your hair properties that will make the biggest difference. Also I heard plopping helps a lot. Sorry couldn't help much but if I find something that works ill post back. Good luck and don't give up
curl type: 2c/3a on a good day
med/high porosity & high density
hair strand width: med/coarse
BSL hair & growing