I have the same exact problem! My waves are not that loose, just very stretched out. Sometimes they get springy and awesome, but it's rare. I will be trying some of these tips! Also, I'd love to see more recs for gels/jellies, always looking to try new ones
high porosity (from coloring)

Shampoo: Mop Top Gentle Shampoo
Co-wash: Chistophe Robin Lemon Cleansing Cream
RO: CJ strengthening, Kenra moisturizing
LI: Jessicurl Aloeba
DT: CJ rehab, Christophe Robin Prickly Pear Mask
PT: SS protein treatment, Ouidad 12 minute
Stylers: Jessicurl RR, SS Firm Hold Gel
Oils: caudalie, sweet almond