No, you're not wrong. My hair doesn't mind parabens at all. Silicones I think weigh it down but parabens are preservatives so they don't make much difference. I simply avoid them because of the increased risk of cancer. There's a good site about the subject. Google "skin deep". They monitor beauty/skin/hair care products for us ladies because the FDA doesn't. I've been avoiding parabens in my skin and cosmetic products for years actually. It's only with hair that I made the exception because Wen was the only thing that "worked" for my hair before and made it possible to detangle in the shower. Also my favorite hair serums for heat styling had parabens in them too. Now that I've gone CG and discovered all these more natural products, however, my hair has sprung up and come back to life. I've never seen it so curly. At least not since I was a child and I discovered how to "fix it" with heat.
I love Shea Moisture, by the way, but I agree with you that the slip is not so great in the restorative conditioner. I have to let it sit a few minutes. I really would like to try that coconut hibiscus one when they finally bring it to my local Walgreens.