That's just it. I am bad at reading people. I don't know what his behavior is telling me.
Some background: I have been out with him 4 times now in the last couple of weeks (and continuing to date other people). On his OKC profile he only checked "new friends" as what he was looking for. I was on the fence about whether I should even reply to his message, but I'm glad I did, because we get along well.
I've been nervous about bringing up relationship stuff, for some reason. But during the last couple of dates he tried to invite me over or invite himself over to my place so I finally asked point blank what he was looking for, because I'm not looking for something casual. He said he wasn't either. He said he was actually nervous because he thought this could turn into something. I'm so gun shy after a year of dating yuckiness that I was thinking, That sounds like a line. I can't tell whether I should believe him. I think it's sad at my age not to be able to tell. But it's also sad to think that a man my age would lie about that. I used to think it was frat-boy kind of behavior, but based on my experiences in the last year, I now know that 30- and 40-somethings are no better.
So when you (spiderlashes) say "believe a 'no' response," I'm like, is checking off "new friends" a sort of preemptive "no" response? Does that trump what he said in person about looking for something serious?