Hi, I second brave's suggestion. That was my initial thought: coconut oil. I also think that touching your scalp with conditioner is a good thing, especially if it is a moisturizing one.
Also, when I apply leave-in conditioner I don't mind massaging a bit on the scalp. It depends what leave in conditioner you use though. And finally, you shouldn't wash your hair every day. I wash mine every second day and even that might be too much. This gives your scalp time to create its own oils.