You know what? In theory I should be able to wear whatever I want and say what I want and people shouldn't judge me. But that's not reality and most times the only thing that people know of you is what they see and hear.

The nose ring and extra earrings are out. I'm not trying to make an extreme statement and I had them for the wrong reasons. I shouldn't be looking like I'm saying, "Look at me," but I want people to want to hear me. Somewhere under all the fluff and defensive layers is a lady (not girl) that is worth it.

I may have to keep repeating this to myself several times again but I will. And it will occur less and less often each time. I can be funny without being a smarta$s or yammering on unless I know exactly what I am talking about.

You hear me, Speckla? Yeah, I'm talking to me.

This has to get to the point where my peptalk is on the inside and not scattered all around so people can see while I gather all the pieces and put myself back together. It can only go on for so long before people will pull away and call it quits. Friends should be there for friends but there comes a time when you're more caretaker than friend and that's not ok.

Last edited by Speckla; 04-22-2013 at 12:05 PM.