LOL KinkyChic. Laughter is great medicine, right?
Man it's a judgement call when it comes to handling this, I think.
I wonder what would happen if, when your mom started up w/you again, you pretended she was aiming all that hair hate at herself (which is really what's happening, probably). What if you just calmly said, “Your natural hair is lovely” after she criticized yours? What if you just practiced that line on her for a while to see what she did with it?
I used to get into an argument whenever my mom started complaining about African hair. Then one time I tried the approach above (“Mom, I think your natural hair is lovely, and I'd love to see it again.”) One time she just wouldn't stop complaining though, so while she talked I started hugging her. (She hugged me back but kept complaining
) But whenever she paused for a second I'd tell her things I love about her hair (her texture – springy and soft (not like wool LOL); her color – salt and pepper; her look – majestic, regal, elegant). Of course she kept disagreeing that time but we ended up laughing and changing the subject. Admittedly, it still fires me up though when that BS about Ham comes up. I hate interpretations of religious texts that propagate racist ideology.
Randi, before you ever got your first relaxer, did you know that relaxers would still require all this extra work? I didn't. Can't believe so many of us were willing to put up w/the damaged look and all those scabs on our heads. All that because we thought we'd be more beautiful!
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