What do you mean by "melt together"? Like one huge clump? I find I do a better at defining and clumping individual bits with finger combing if you can believe it. I've heard of this method too. It's like conditioner only styling on steroids. It's okay. Finger coiling doesn't work for A LOT of people. . . what else have you tried to help define the hair? And what conditioner are you using now for styling?