I agree with the idea of cutting your damaged hair off, but I also understand how that sounds as you're already upset about it being as short as it is.
Thing is, it's already short, and you might be surprised to find yourself feeling some relief by getting rid of all that damage. Sounds like that damage is literally weighing you down! And at a much shorter length, you won't have to use much hair product, and you'll be relieved of having to figure out how to style your hair to hide all that damage. You can invest in - what someone else suggested - cheap, but cool earrings. Black beauty supply stores almost always have $1 earrings. You could start there.
You'll get through this.