I'm just starting this journey as a straight-haired mother to a curly-haired daughter. I found myself in a similar position to you a fortnight ago: 7 yr old daughter in tears at bedtime after a hair battle. So I went away and did some Internet research and found out lots of things that you probably already know about how to treat curly hair: never brush it, only finger comb it when wet etc etc

That night I sat down and made her a little newspaper with all the hair facts just for her. Including the fact that we need to keep trying until we find what works, as my daughter wants everything to be right the first time. I found photos of any curly-haired teachers on her school website and put them in. I found baby photos of her with curls before we starting fighting. I used photos of Disney's Merida.

She liked her newsletter and at least it stopped us fighting. Now we call it the Great Hair Experiment. We're about to try the Curly Girl method once I've bought the sulfate free stuff.

Good luck.