I would say that for us, a year is a pretty good run. I think you've made a lot of emotional progress, but it still comes down to the same old issue, which isn't solved simply because some of the antagonists are now dead.

I will still wish you well on your birthday, but I'm going to let go. I can't "get over it" or forget. I don't live it on a daily basis, but it did happen, and a kindly suggestion citing how long it's been since then doesn't help. I was six years old, for God's sake. If the same thing had happened to S., I doubt very much you'd make the same request. In fact, the thought is laughable.

Anyway, it was fun while it lasted. I hope this means I can skip the graduations come spring. I get anxious on your turf. And I think you've spoiled J.