thanx everyone for the suggestions

I used to use honey mixed in with conditioner in my hear a couple years ago and I found the effects to be really nice, but the honey tended to leave my hair a little on the sticky side (even if I did add lots of condish to it and rinsed it all out and then added more condish)...
also the Ouidad products....I used them once in a while but I really don't like them...I find them incredibly drying...like when I use their gel I get frizz city...I dunno why cause a lot of others have had success with these products but I guess my hair is just really particular....

I still haven't found a gel or a conditioner that truly works on me....

Honestly for the past two months I've been straightening almost every time because my hair has been soooooo horrible curly....the past few days are the first days in a long time that I left it curly and I still had to use a curling iron to help the curls....

of course I know all the additional heat styling is definitely not helping the dryness situation, I'm not willing not to heat style because my hair is just really really horrible without it...

Do you guys know of any good products that can help when heat styling as well?
Was 3b then I did a soft relaxer and I think I'm now a 3a
pw: curly