Anyone been through this??

I have this feeling that if I use products, even conditioner, I am somehow "cheating." I know that it's not logical-- I don't feel like I am cheating when I put lotion on my body. And I'm sure I'll get over it. But I was wondering if anyone else has felt this way and got over it?

I went so far as to let my hair dry naked and I added that to my album. I don't want to wear it that way so I am just trying to accept that that's ok and it's ok to give my hair mositure and stuff.

Thanks for any comments and understanding! I'm feeling a little crazy.
"It is wrong to use moral means to preserve immoral ends." MLK, Jr.

Password= urban
I have this feeling that if I use products, even conditioner, I am somehow "cheating." I know that it's not logical-- I don't feel like I am cheating when I put lotion on my body.
Originally Posted by urbancurl
I guess I don't understand what you mean by 'cheating'? Conditioners & moisturizers are good for your hair, so how would putting something 'good' in your hair be cheating??
Transition: May 03
Bc'd on Feb 14, 2004
Length: 8 - 10'
Type: THICK curly/coily/wavy
GOAL: Healthy Bra Strap Length
HG: (I'm going to step out on a limb here and say...) Smooth N Shine Curl Activator & Fantasia IC w/ Sparklites
I have this feeling that if I use products, even conditioner, I am somehow "cheating." I know that it's not logical-- I don't feel like I am cheating when I put lotion on my body.
Originally Posted by urbancurl
I guess I don't understand what you mean by 'cheating'? Conditioners & moisturizers are good for your hair, so how would putting something 'good' in your hair be cheating??
Originally Posted by Anoxia
Anoxia, I think you are absolutely right. I don't know where I got the idea that using products is cheating, but somehow I did.
"It is wrong to use moral means to preserve immoral ends." MLK, Jr.

Password= urban
I agree with Anoxia.....if it helps in keeping the hair healthy, I don't find it to be cheating. In fact, I find it to be a necessity.
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I think that maybe Cehua has based on our exchange about what it means to go "product-less," but I could be reading too much into that exchange. My sense of it is that Cehua is proud of her results with just a leave-in, and she does have great hair! You also have great hair and in your one album, bravely used absolutely no products, not even a leave-in or left over conditioner.

I accept my use of products, am a true PJ and also color my hair to cover grays To me, the most radical thing you can do to your hair to change it is TR or a very strong relaxer or constant flat ironing. Texturizers are the next step down, and after that blow drying or roller sets. Applying products to natural (or in my case transitioning) hair is really no big deal and still qualifies, in my view, as embracing the beauty and health of your curls.

I say, be happy with your curls and texture - whether product-free or enhanced with products.
"Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people."

"I think that somehow, we learn who we really are and then we live with that decision."
- Eleanor Roosevelt (both quotes)

(taking a break from posting starting late august 2009)
I just do conditioner most of the time - the majority of my transitioning pics are like that. I find with my hair being in between less is more as I almost need 2 types of product anyway.
I don't consider it cheating. Conditioner maintains the health of my hair just as lotion does for my skin. Without lotion, my skin gets cracked and dry and ashy and flakes and it hurts and it's gross. Without conditioner, my hair would be brittle, dry and break off, thus looking bad. With long, thick, dry corkscrews recovering from chemicals, no conditioner isn't an option.
I too am proud of my results without products. Like curltopia, I love products, but unlike her, I don't feel they're necessary. I am using a lot of things like oils, coffee, eggs, cayenne pepper, molasses with just as good or better results.
Get used to me. Black, confident, cocky; my name, not yours; my religion, not yours; my goals, my own; get used to me. -Muhammad Ali











I too am proud of my results without products. Like curltopia, I love products, but unlike her, I don't feel they're necessary. I am using a lot of things like oils, coffee, eggs, cayenne pepper, molasses with just as good or better results.
Originally Posted by Amneris
I envy your hair freedom and experimentation, Amneris, although am moving towards greater use of purely natural ingredients like coffee, honey and molasses, and have started leaving in more of my conditioner too! But I may never give up the products. In my mind, they signfify control over my hair and more consistency of how my hair looks when it is down, which is important to me for work. I like knowing that I can essentially guarantee myself a good hair day with use of certain product combinations... I save risks for weekends, and even then there are plenty of times when I want the extra security of a guaranteed good hair night that is afforded by products. Since I don't use huge amounts, and don't otherwise manipulate my hair with heat styling, etc.., I don't consider it an issue at all. And I have a lot of pride in how my hair looks - the curl patterns and texture.
"Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people."

"I think that somehow, we learn who we really are and then we live with that decision."
- Eleanor Roosevelt (both quotes)

(taking a break from posting starting late august 2009)
oh, you have great hair, curltopia, just a different perspective. There's nothing wrong with products! Sometimes I use them just for the scent. It's just that with summer humidity, my hair is much healthier, springier and less dry than winter (I love my hair in summer - in winter it needs so much more pampering) and because I am transitioning, I now have a ton of textures that I'm still figuring out - my hair just had a growth spurt (I need to post pics) and so I am wearing it up a lot, also because of the heat.
You are lucky because you have a very healthy routine - you can airdry your hair without heat and get it to look good. I'm still working on this. And yes, I mess with my hair way too much, but that's my version of product experimentation!
And at some point I am going to have to go back to products, given the amount I have. it's funny because I used to get all excited about puddings, creams etc. but now all the stuff I'm curious about is conditioner.
Get used to me. Black, confident, cocky; my name, not yours; my religion, not yours; my goals, my own; get used to me. -Muhammad Ali











Thank you so much for all of your thoughts and feelings!!! I think I am starting to see what has been going on with my mini hair crisis. And I couldn't have done it without you. (this is kinda long, sorry, but it feels so good to get it out!!!!!)

As a kid, I usually wore my hair combed out, big and puffy. Very Diana Ross-like, like in my no-conish pics only bigger. This is just how my mom did my hair. We didn't know it was curly. Sometimes I'd get a relaxer but I hated the heat and the upkeep. So when I began taking care of it myself, I couldn't deal with combing all that hair. I just used gel-- put it in wet finger-combed hair, let it dry. This worked well for many years and my hair looked more wavy than curly. But all of sudden, 5 or 6 years ago, this stopped working (build up? dried out?). I went to a hairdresser who showed me how to leave regular conditioner in my hairl. I started doing that, and my hair looked much curlier. Healthier? That's what I've been doing ever since, and I generally liked and felt content with my hair. I accepted that on some days it would be big and super-curly, on others smooth and smaller. I got frequent compliments.

But lately, a month or so ago I started to feel frustrated that I had no control of how big or small or frizzy my hair would get. I don't know why I got tired of going with the flow but I did. I flat-ironed it and cut bangs to have a drastically different look. A week later it got humid. I decided maybe I would relax again for a change, or go full-force into ironing it and find ways to keep the frizz away. But something told me don't do it-- you're moving to Florida soon! As a last ditch effort on staying with my curls, I did some searches onling for curly hairstyles and found this site. And I've been experiementing every since. It's important for me to love my texture, and I was feeling like **if I didn't wear my hair completely plain, it meant I didn't love it!!!*** But the body-lotion analogy is a good one-- I DO love my body, my skin, so I want to take care of it! **Using conditioner and even products is just part of taking CARE of my hair, right?** It's not cheating, it's self-care!

And so far, my fave non-product combo is Elucence and honey left-in. My fave product combo is Biolage Gelle over any condish.
"It is wrong to use moral means to preserve immoral ends." MLK, Jr.

Password= urban
Amneris-

Thanks! You're so sweet

Urban-

Sorry for kind of guano'ing your thread a bit with my tangent... but I'm glad that you've figured it all out and feel better (although I'm sure the reflexology gift from your mother helped as much as your fellow NC'ers ). I'm going to try Elucence left in with some honey today...........
"Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people."

"I think that somehow, we learn who we really are and then we live with that decision."
- Eleanor Roosevelt (both quotes)

(taking a break from posting starting late august 2009)
Curltopia,

No need to apologize for guano! You are one of the nicest curlies here! I kinda think of you as one of the hosts, always welcoming/helping people.
"It is wrong to use moral means to preserve immoral ends." MLK, Jr.

Password= urban
Awwww, Urban... You're way too kind/sweet !

By the way, I tried Elucence left in (about half of it) with a little honey and watered down Biolage Gellee. I LOVED that combination and then got second day hair the next day too! One of these hot summer weekends, I am going to try your product-less experiment and maybe post pictures... that is, if I am brave!
"Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people."

"I think that somehow, we learn who we really are and then we live with that decision."
- Eleanor Roosevelt (both quotes)

(taking a break from posting starting late august 2009)
Awwww, Urban... You're way too kind/sweet !

By the way, I tried Elucence left in (about half of it) with a little honey and watered down Biolage Gellee. I LOVED that combination and then got second day hair the next day too! One of these hot summer weekends, I am going to try your product-less experiment and maybe post pictures... that is, if I am brave!
Originally Posted by curltopia
I'm glad the Elucence/honey worked for you too! The curls really stay together. And yes, join me with the procuct-less experiment! But if you do, make sure you're not nearing PMS, potentially-stressful visits with straight-haired family members, or anything else like that.

Are you still in PJ jail? I'm trying to keep myself there a little longer, so I'll have to keep experimenting with what I've got.
"It is wrong to use moral means to preserve immoral ends." MLK, Jr.

Password= urban
Awwww, Urban... You're way too kind/sweet !

By the way, I tried Elucence left in (about half of it) with a little honey and watered down Biolage Gellee. I LOVED that combination and then got second day hair the next day too! One of these hot summer weekends, I am going to try your product-less experiment and maybe post pictures... that is, if I am brave!
Originally Posted by curltopia
Yo Elucence!
You tried something of mine, I tried something of yours - I used Biolage Gelee for the first time today - didn't water it down as it already seemd very light. Very slight hardness and crunchiness but not that bad, and I got excellent, very defined and smooth spirals. I was very surprised!
Get used to me. Black, confident, cocky; my name, not yours; my religion, not yours; my goals, my own; get used to me. -Muhammad Ali











Urban-

Well, I just had to take advantage of that 1 day 15% off curlmart sale, and did so on my day pass from PJ jail I can't wait to get all of my goodies and get my reviews going!! I'll try not to enable anybody too much

Amneris-

I'm super glad that you liked the Gellee When I get the rare case of light crunchies, I just "scrunch" them out and the curls look great and long holding... But the watered down method is not just for super thick gels. Without fail, if a gel is a medium to strong hold gel, if I water it down a little before applying to damp hair, I don't get any crunchies which makes my hair and me happy.... Anyway, WELCOME (sort of) to the gel club..
"Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people."

"I think that somehow, we learn who we really are and then we live with that decision."
- Eleanor Roosevelt (both quotes)

(taking a break from posting starting late august 2009)

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