Every reply is wrong (Ignored and Dismissed on NC.com)

Does anyone else have this problem - when your checking out a thread and you think you have something to add, you post a reply and always the same people come behind you and say your wrong? It's like nobody on here will listen to anyone else but the same 6 or 7 people's opinion. I am beginning to think why even post?! Was I naive to think this was a place without clicks and unique to everyone?
Short 4A Hair.
Does anyone else have this problem - when your checking out a thread and you think you have something to add, you post a reply and always the same people come behind you and say your wrong? It's like nobody on here will listen to anyone else but the same 6 or 7 people's opinion. I am beginning to think why even post?! Was I naive to think this was a place without clicks and unique to everyone?
Originally Posted by GabbyC
Hey Gabby... I haven't been hanging around here much lately, I just thought I would say hi. Don't let it bug you... some people are like that in IRL, and act the same here. I've always heard tales of clicks around here, but I'm too clueless to notice .
3c, CG Fine hairs, med growth.
Formerly "Rainyday"
I've had that problem but not so much in this board except when I get into political arguments. That's when I reach for my "ignore user" button and poof, problem solved.

I like having something "down below"
Originally Posted by spring1onu
What would you call it, sci-fi guru?
Originally Posted by smurfette
don't click this. seriously.
Pacific Poppy wrote:

Hey Gabby... I haven't been hanging around here much lately, I just thought I would say hi. Don't let it bug you... some people are like that in IRL, and act the same here. I've always heard tales of clicks around here, but I'm too clueless to notice .

Thanks for the reply. I am trying not to let it bug me, but it does. This is supposed to be a place where people who have felt different all their life or just want to find a way to accept and manage their hair can come for advice and support. But what happens? If you don't have long, perfectly defined frizz free curls, you don't have anything to offer or your just totally ignored. Sorry I'm going off, but it gets irritating because I know I'm not alone.

Perfect example - even now this thread is being ignored Oh well, I was never big on fitting in anyway.
Short 4A Hair.
gabby,
your post isnt being ignored sweetie, i hear you loud and clearly! I TOTALLY AGREE W THE LONG PERFECTLY FRIZZ FREE HAIR MONOPOLY! but hey, thats the way the cookie crumbles. get the info you need, give the info you have...and dont sweat it!

ETA: i loved your long hair obsession post!
loose 4a, silky meets cottony
routine: co-wash, add leave in or plain water, shake & go
staples: elucence poo & conditioners, V05 & suave naturals, jessicurl too shea, AO.
GabbyC, I know what you mean. There are alot of very vocal posters who seem to dominate the board, but that doesn't mean that what you say is overlooked by the not-so-vocal posters.

Just know that the things you say are helpful to others, even though you may be drowned out by more vocal posters. I often find certain posts helpful, but I may not take the time to write anything or respond to it. Alot of times I post and there aren't really any responses, but I know that people have read it and maybe it helped them.

HTH!
3c/4a - Relaxer Free since Feburary 2004 and Obsessed with my hair.

I have pictures now! password: curlygirl
Jazzijenni81

I know your not ignoring me and know exactly what I'm saying. Your right, I don't need to sweat it.
Short 4A Hair.
curlycovrgirl

Thanks for the response. Just because we don't always get responses doesn't mean we didn't help. Gotcha - but I can't help but to feel irritated when you see a thread and you know you have a good suggestion that may help the person, then someone (same 6 or 7 people) comes behind and says no, that won't work or that's a bad idea. It's like why don't we all just leave and let those dominating posters have this forum.
Short 4A Hair.
Speaking as an every-day lurker and some-time poster, I can tell you that every post that I read shapes my opinions and influences what I try. I don't always post thanks, but I suppose I should. Even if I try something that's totally not right for my hair, it helps to know what doesn't work. I don't think anybody's posts here are wrong!
I'm a 3b, with 3c underneath.

Used to be CG, now I'm not. Using Suave Aloe & Waterlily shampoo & condish, JoiWhip, BRHG, Suave Aloe gel, Aussie Tizz No Frizz, and anything else that looks good!
My Myspace!
Thanks Curlyjenn.

I think what I will just do is start hanging out in the 3b forum when I'm on here. I have mostly 3c hair, but some 3b is in there. I will follow my own suggestion - let them have this forum. Wow, I didn't realize I was this disgusted. Thanks everyone for the replies.
Short 4A Hair.
I understand your frustration GabbyC. But remember, you don't always have to be aggressive and loud to make a point. Just b/c some agressive posters dismissed what you said, doesn't mean that the majority of the board did. There's only 6 or 7 of them right? They aren't the majority.
3c/4a - Relaxer Free since Feburary 2004 and Obsessed with my hair.

I have pictures now! password: curlygirl
Your right curlycovrgirl - I'm glad I started this thread. I'm not alone and maybe some other poster's who get ignored and dismissed can post here and chat.
Short 4A Hair.
Gabby, I am sorry you feel that way. Is it one particular post or just a bunch of posts? One or two people or a lot of people?

I haven't noticed this, yet, but then again - I really don't care unless someone is rude towards me.

You know what? If someone offends you again, just call them on it right then and there. Trust me, you will feel a lot better!

You don't have to do so in a rude way, just address it and speak your mind.

I know, this is easier said then done, for some - but you should give it a try.
http://public.fotki.com/braziliancurls/
pw:wondercurls
HG: CURLS Pure Essentials, Naturally Enhanced curl lotion, and Curl Ecstasy conditioner, DevaCurl OneC, Cream of Nature Shampoo
Pacific Poppy wrote:

Hey Gabby... I haven't been hanging around here much lately, I just thought I would say hi. Don't let it bug you... some people are like that in IRL, and act the same here. I've always heard tales of clicks around here, but I'm too clueless to notice .

Thanks for the reply. I am trying not to let it bug me, but it does. This is supposed to be a place where people who have felt different all their life or just want to find a way to accept and manage their hair can come for advice and support. But what happens? If you don't have long, perfectly defined frizz free curls, you don't have anything to offer or your just totally ignored. Sorry I'm going off, but it gets irritating because I know I'm not alone.

Perfect example - even now this thread is being ignored Oh well, I was never big on fitting in anyway.
Originally Posted by GabbyC
I know exactly what you mean. EVERY single time I start a thread I only get about 4 responses, but if I were someone else on this board with perfect hair - one of the "cool kids" lol i would have thousands and thousands of responses. I mean, do people screen the name of the person who began the post? "Oh, it's not xxx, so I'm not going to reply."
By the way, look at my post for fuzzy hair, i need help...
Pacific Poppy wrote:

Hey Gabby... I haven't been hanging around here much lately, I just thought I would say hi. Don't let it bug you... some people are like that in IRL, and act the same here. I've always heard tales of clicks around here, but I'm too clueless to notice .

Thanks for the reply. I am trying not to let it bug me, but it does. This is supposed to be a place where people who have felt different all their life or just want to find a way to accept and manage their hair can come for advice and support. But what happens? If you don't have long, perfectly defined frizz free curls, you don't have anything to offer or your just totally ignored. Sorry I'm going off, but it gets irritating because I know I'm not alone.

Perfect example - even now this thread is being ignored Oh well, I was never big on fitting in anyway.
Originally Posted by GabbyC
I know exactly what you mean. EVERY single time I start a thread I only get about 4 responses, but if I were someone else on this board with perfect hair - one of the "cool kids" lol i would have thousands and thousands of responses. I mean, do people screen the name of the person who began the post? "Oh, it's not xxx, so I'm not going to reply."
By the way, look at my post for fuzzy hair, i need help...
I honestly haven't seen this cool kids trend some of you are talking about. Some posters are more vocal, and maybe that affects whether people respond. It makes sense, because you tend to gravitate towards stuff you're familiar with. [It can have the opposite effect though!]

I've noticed that my threads sometimes get zero attention, sometimes get tons of attention. The difference between the two seems to be totally random. I'm guessing it has to do with time of day, other threads active at the time, etc.

If I want to make sure to get responses, I bump the thread and say "pretty please" or something. But I wait a day or two before I do this, since these things seem to take time.

ETA: When I first joined the boards, I didn't do a whole lot of posting saying "Help me please, my hair's a mess!" Even though it was. What I *did* do was read a lot, did a lot of searches, since most of this stuff's been covered before. Then, if I had a specific question about something current [new product, technique, whatever], I would post. I think if your post asking for help isn't really specific, people aren't as likely to respond because it's overwhelming.
I'm not singling anyone out on this thread in saying this -- just some general observations I've made in my time here.
Thanks for all the responses.

Babyphat21,

LMAO! I like that, "one of the cool kids". I feel ya! I'll get over to your thread right away.

BrazilianCurls,

It's just in general. I can't really pinpoint without naming names and I don't want to do that.
Short 4A Hair.
I'm sorry you feel that way, but please don't leave to go to 3B, we need you here. I am also mostly 3c with tiny bit o' 3b for good luck

I guess you are seeing this mostly on the 3c thread, not in other threads? I know what you mean,though. I rarely start a brand new thread in the hair boards anymore because I know a lot of people won't reply, but I a attribute that to maybe such a thread has already been done to death in the past and nobody wants to bother. A lot of the issues I still have regarding my hair are still ones that I've had all my life. Also, I think a lot of curlies have finally found what will work for their hair and don't really feel a need to post or reply as much on the hair boards as they used to and are more active in the "non-hair discussion board"

Anyway, so I just try to read and read as much as I can on these hair boards to try to see what will work for my hair and do a lot of Searches. (I know, searches can get frustrating though.) I do reply to hair threads and if I have questions on already existing threads and no one has replied, I bump them up. I haven't been able to get perfect curls yet, but I am certainly trying.
"It's a matter of taking the side of the weak against the strong, something the best people have always done."- Harriet Beecher Stowe
I'm sorry you feel this way, Gabby.

I haven't noticed this but I also don't spend too much time here on 3C.
i've noticed this too like

the cliques/cool kids posts get tons of replies when non cool kids posts hardly get any attention.

the cliques/cool kids have tons of sway when it comes to product recs. like if 2 or 3 cool kids say a product works, everyone will jump on the bandwagon but if a non cool kid says a product works, the recs will be practically ignored.

i guess certain people have more leadership qualities/charisma than others which comes out in their posts and since there are more followers than leaders in this world, i guess it makes sense that some people will hang onto and follow behind everything they say or do.

there are a few independent spirits here so there's still hope!

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