Looking to obtain SOFT HAIR! Please help

Alyssa-Brikale · 09-03-2011, 05:14 PM

So I cut my 4b/4a hair(still trying to figure that part out as well haha) and it is really short. I don't know if because of how short it is, the products I use, or the fact I haven't put any heat to my hair for why my hair is not soft.

My hair is probably a inch all around. This is my 3rd day all natural. I have used Apple cider vinegar, ouidad poo, kk detangler, coconut oil and Aussie leave-in 1st day. I didn't like how oily my hair felt and dry it looked. so the next day I ran water through my hair and used the kkc(true what they say "less is more"). Loved how moisted it felt but didn't last all night at work and looked dry by end of day. Do I need to try a gel with kkc to get a shine?

I don't want to use heat but when I use to press my hair, with Pantiene pro-v creme(women of color) it would feel soft afterwards. Is that the case that I have to resort to, pressing my hair to make it soft? Then it would look more like a Afro instead of having individual curls right?

Last I would love any suggestions on what you think my hair regime should be based on the product I have or may not have and should add next time I get paid. Many thanks and love to all who reply to this. I will truly feel blessed with any suggestions.

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mesha188 · 09-03-2011, 05:39 PM

all I can say is Shea butter Shea butter!

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mesha188 · 09-03-2011, 05:41 PM

undefined Shea butter and protein treatments

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honey3 · 09-04-2011, 04:34 PM

water will make your hair soft. some leave in conditioners might help.

flat ironed hair is also usually soft, if you can use pure unrefined shea butter in the hair before you set the damp hair.

Namine · 09-04-2011, 05:42 PM

First off, congratulations on going natural!

I think you may be experiencing scab hair. Scab hair results from damaged hair follicles which can be caused by relaxers, synthetic hair dye, etc. Scab hair is normally quite dry despite numerous attempts to moisturize or soften it. My older sister and l both experienced scab hair in our newly natural days. Gel can provide shine, like Fantasia IC Gel or Eco Styler, however it all depends on what works for one's hair. One shouldn't have to resort to pressing their hair to acheive softness if they don't want to. Doing so may harm the hair in regards to maintaining moisture. My older sister used Qhemet Biologics Amla & Olive Heavy Cream while she was transitioning and it left her hair soft and moisturized for a week. The product is $5.50 for a 2 ounce or $16.50 for a 8 ounce jar plus shipping, but it's worth the price as a little goes a long way and if it works for one's hair. Qhemet Biologics is currently closed, but they reopen September 9th. Here's the website: www.qhemetbiologics.com. My Honey Child Honey Hair Mask(www.myhoneychild.com) is also effective in treating dry hair. Prices start at $5 plus shipping for a 4oz. 8oz and 16oz jars are also available. My older sister used it beginning her 3rd transition 25 months ago. Results were the same as the qhemet biologics heavy cream. Regarding shine, extra virgin or virgin coconut oil produces a fair amount of shine/sheen for some naturals. Also, a cold water rinse after conditioning can also provide shine and definition. Hope this helps and if you have any questions, feel free to let me know

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capellifelici · 09-04-2011, 05:59 PM

I would say that plopping your hair, then letting it fully dry up in duck clips, as well as not over-producting your hair, are two very important things. Also I think that you're on the right track with following the CG, but I would even ditch the Aussie. Also in addition to the CG, I would look up and then eliminate short-chain alcohols from your routine. Short-chain alcohols are going to dry out your hair, which will make it more brittle and less soft.

Best of luck in your CG journey!

Alyssa-Brikale · 09-05-2011, 07:19 PM

Thanks for the advice. Just bought some UN're shea butter. It smells horrible but I thing I will heat it up and distribute the shea evenly through my hair to see if it soften my hair. Or should I do something else with it? I want to stay with natural products and I think I will lay off the Aussie even though I hear great things about it. That's like me not wanting to give up on pantene or pressing( things I think work) but I don't want the chemicals. I use water everyday on my hair just don't drench it with water everyday because water is essential to growing your hair(just what I believe)!......

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Natural_fienD · 09-05-2011, 08:39 PM

[QUOTE=Namine;1758364]First off, congratulations on going natural!

I think you may be experiencing scab hair. Scab hair results from damaged hair follicles which can be caused by relaxers, synthetic hair dye, etc. Scab hair is normally quite dry despite numerous attempts to moisturize or soften it. ....

Cosign! Scab hair is real and it sux! But you have options so no worries-- I just made it one year natural in August and it took several attempts of using/trying different things to keep my hair looking healthy and moisturized. I would try DCing weekly with heat (you can use a hooded dryer for 20/30 mins or body heat w/ wool cap for an hour), wash/co-wash 1-2xs/wk and use a good leave-in (I like Garnier Sleek N Shine or Aussie Hair Insurance) daily. When I wash/co-wash, I seal with Murray's pomade to make sure the moisture stays put. I know a lot of naturals lose it when considering applying mineral oil/petroleum oil to their hair (I did too,) but for me the heavy sealing method was the only rock I left unturned. It works great for my hair and is easily removed with a clairifying shampoo. Aside from that, my hair was overly porous and I had to treat the issue with Roux Shampoo/Conditioner for a few months. Good Luck on your journey and be patient, its totally worth it!

sewt15 · 09-06-2011, 09:25 AM

I definitely understand ur problem. When I first went natural (for the second time) I had the same problem. One thing that I highly advise is to NOT START PRESSING/FLAT IRONING YOUR HAIR. I did this when I first cut off my permed ends and I had sooooo much heat damage. I set my self back alot and just cut my heat damaged hair off. It also took me alot of time and experimenting to find out what products worked for my hair. You may have overly porous hair (hair that cannot retain moisture). Look in the high porosity forums. I will post pics of when I went natural and the heat damage. Last but not least Kudos for coming to the land of versatility. I hope you like the natural world

damsel_fly · 09-07-2011, 04:50 PM

After washing, I use Neutrogena's leave in (Triple Moisture Silk Touch, I think it is called). Then I put a coconut oil/castor oil mixture on top. I'm surprised how soft my hair stays.

Inimitable · 09-08-2011, 09:09 AM

I dont know if this will work for you, but I was having issues with my hair being 'hard.' When I did a overnight DC then morning rinse followed by a Leave-in and un're she a butter. OOH-WEE, my hair was soooo soft. I BC's 2 months ago and one of the best pieces of advice I got was to do wash n go's for at least a month in order to learn the hair. I would suggest the same to you as well. HTH, and Good Luck

Alyssa-Brikale · 09-08-2011, 04:58 PM

Thanks ladies, loving all the advice.

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Flower princess · 09-09-2011, 01:46 AM

If you want natural products on the cheaper side i'll suggest you try as a shampoo shea moisture shampoo, yes qhemet amla is a a good moisturizer but kind of expensive. So stick with shea butter if it works for you.Before applying the butter apply a liquid leave in or water and use the butter to seal it in.Try to find a conditioner or a deep conditioner that keeps your hair really moisturized like trying aubrey organics honeysuckle conditioner or natures gate conditioner any kind just make sure it's the one in the ivory bottle (it's cheaper than aubrey) and transforming it into a DT by adding some honey and some oils i also recommend you try roux porosity conditioner to balance your hairs porosity.

iRougeLady · 09-09-2011, 05:35 AM

I agree with Flower Princess. You need more moisture than grease/oils/butters. Try making an Aubrey's Organics Honeysuckle Rose Conditioner Leave in spritz:

-Get the conditioner and pour some in a spray bottle.

-Pour warm water in it, along with some glycerine or honey.

-Shake it about until it looks like a sort of milk.

-Spray a fair amount on the hair.

This was my solution when my hair weren't feeling all soft like everyone else described, and it works for me.

nhappyjackie · 09-14-2011, 09:13 AM

I didn't read all of the messages, so not sure if you've already been told this. But, you just BC'ed. When you hear/read stories from women who newly BC, they experience a lot of dryness which leads to dull looking hard hair. Right now, your hair needs moisture. As much moisture as you can give it. Try co-washing more often and only use shampoo every two weeks at the most because it will lead to more dryness. Increase your deep conditioning. Try to do it overnight at least 2/week. This will help to increase your hair's moisture. I have heard of scab hair, but don't really have an opinion on it. When I first BC'ed down to about 1 inch of hair, my hair felt just as you described. I began co-washing and sealing daily, and I only shampoo'ed about every 2 weeks. I would DC overnight 2/week. After about a month or so of this, I noticed my hair staying moisturized and shiny for longer periods of time. If you truly have what they call scab hair, overtime that hair will go away with breakage, shedding and trims, so I wouldn't worry about it too much.

Forgot to add, be careful with protein. Only do protein treatments if you are 100% sure your hair needs it, otherwise, you will expereince even more dryness and breakage due to protein overload.