The New & Improved Say It I Dare You

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i have a idea for a book, a natural hair book. my idea is from a angle that hasn't been covered yet....i don't know what to do about it. this idea has been burning in the back of my brain since i was pregnant, but lately it's really been nagging at me. on the one hand i feel like if i don't at least try it out, it'll eat at me forever. on the other hand, i only really have experience with my own head, who am i to give advice? last year, right after michelle was born, i was super lonely at home, with no company but a screaming newborn. So to have contact with people, i joined a natural group on facebook, and gave tons of advice. about 90% of the women i talked to really appreciated my advice, and said following my instructions helped their hair thrive. the rest? well they called me a nazi for being against mineral oil, texturizers, and rubberbands. they were very vocal and i ended up leaving the group because i'm sensitive, and arguing everyday was stressful. i don't want anything like that to happen again, and they were partially right, who am i? i don't have a youtube channel, or blog, or followers. who would buy a book by some random, in this day and age? even if it was unique.

but still, it's eating at me.
vegas_curls and adthomas like this.
Last Relaxer: February 14, 2011
BC: March 17, 2012
Porosity: Low to Normal
Curl Type: 4a/3c
Texture: Coarse
Density: Thick
Length:shoulder

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i have a idea for a book, a natural hair book. my idea is from a angle that hasn't been covered yet....i don't know what to do about it. this idea has been burning in the back of my brain since i was pregnant, but lately it's really been nagging at me. on the one hand i feel like if i don't at least try it out, it'll eat at me forever. on the other hand, i only really have experience with my own head, who am i to give advice? last year, right after michelle was born, i was super lonely at home, with no company but a screaming newborn. So to have contact with people, i joined a natural group on facebook, and gave tons of advice. about 90% of the women i talked to really appreciated my advice, and said following my instructions helped their hair thrive. the rest? well they called me a nazi for being against mineral oil, texturizers, and rubberbands. they were very vocal and i ended up leaving the group because i'm sensitive, and arguing everyday was stressful. i don't want anything like that to happen again, and they were partially right, who am i? i don't have a youtube channel, or blog, or followers. who would buy a book by some random, in this day and age? even if it was unique.

but still, it's eating at me.
Originally Posted by naturaldoll
Doll,
There are things in life I am personally against and would not do but I understand and respect others are free to make their own choices. Example I think putting a relaxer or any chemical in a pre puberty child's hair is wrong and I think on a child who hasn't reached school age relaxers are abusive. If I'm a natural n*zi for that then so be it. I don't go forcing my opinion on people but I don't hide it either. I don't use permanent dye because of the damage I got from it but some people use it no problem. We are all different so I'm not against it. I will admit I am somewhat a natural snob. I am not against grown people relaxers but if they are texturized or relaxed or then I'm not really interested in discussing hair with them. It's not anything personal just that I'm only into natural hair. shrug.
Don't think having a YT channel or blog gives automatic credibility because I have seen some dumb stuff on YT and some sketchy scam like stuff. You should totally do your book. You might want to join a writer's group to learn about the process and publishing. I used to belong to one because I write poems and short stories.
Natural Doll - the nagging feeling means you need to do it. There will always be naysayers so ignore them. You can always have a disclaimer that says this won't work for everyone. If you got a positive response from 90% of that group then that means there is a need out there. I agree with AdT that a lot ignorant people have YouTube channels and blogs.

Sent from my SPH-L710 using CurlTalk App
3b/c, medium-coarse, low porosity, high density
HG: Jessicurl Too Shea and Kinky Curly Curling Custard
Shampoo: nonsulfate shampoo and Suave Naturals sulfate shampoo when needed
Go for it, Doll! I 3rd the notion that there's a whole lotta foolishness on youtube 'n such - don't let that stop you!
naturaldoll likes this.
Some of the biggest BS is some of these videos labeled black hair growth. There is one woman with a video about what she is going to use to grow her hair then next video she brags how good her results where but she timmed two inches before the follow up so we can't see it. Yeah right. Then there is a lady with long hair saying how some vitamin drink grew her hair. But then I saw a follow where she is mad someone called her out for not disclosing in the first video she is a distributor. She goes on how she is a Christian and she was just trying to help people. Well to me not saying she worked for the company while endorsing a product is unethical and unethical last I checked isn't very Christianlike. Don't get me started on the make your own JBCO video or heat damage and heat training are not the same thing videos. I mean chicks with thin scraggly no edges hair are making videos like they are experts. And I unsubbed Glamfun not just because she relaxed but because the reason(s) she gave kept changing and were sketchy. Sorry I don't believe a derm told her to relax her hair to treat a scalp condition knowing what relaxers can do to scalps. Plus my doctor told me and I know many others whose doctors told them to stop using chemicals when dealing with hair loss. But then the other story she gave was she was going on vacation and didn't want to deal with her hair and relaxed it. Two very different tales and I think the second is true but she wanted convince people she had to do it so she made that up.
Some of the biggest BS is some of these videos labeled black hair growth. There is one woman with a video about what she is going to use to grow her hair then next video she brags how good her results where but she timmed two inches before the follow up so we can't see it. Yeah right. Then there is a lady with long hair saying how some vitamin drink grew her hair. But then I saw a follow where she is mad someone called her out for not disclosing in the first video she is a distributor. She goes on how she is a Christian and she was just trying to help people. Well to me not saying she worked for the company while endorsing a product is unethical and unethical last I checked isn't very Christianlike. Don't get me started on the make your own JBCO video or heat damage and heat training are not the same thing videos. I mean chicks with thin scraggly no edges hair are making videos like they are experts. And I unsubbed Glamfun not just because she relaxed but because the reason(s) she gave kept changing and were sketchy. Sorry I don't believe a derm told her to relax her hair to treat a scalp condition knowing what relaxers can do to scalps. Plus my doctor told me and I know many others whose doctors told them to stop using chemicals when dealing with hair loss. But then the other story she gave was she was going on vacation and didn't want to deal with her hair and relaxed it. Two very different tales and I think the second is true but she wanted convince people she had to do it so she made that up.
Originally Posted by adthomas
On the one hand, I was so happy when I discovered people were putting their beauty and hair routines on YT a couple of years ago. If I had known that/had that type of information was offered in 1999, 2000, 2005 and 2008, I probably wouldn't have accepted the answer, "You should just relax it/weave it" when my roots were growing out and I wanted to do something to style my hair. Or, getting really well-meaning family friends who were natural giving me completely not useful books like "Textured Tresses: The Ultimate Guide to Maintaining and Styling Natural Hair."

So, I'm really grateful for all the stuff on YT.

That said, a lot of it is ridiculous, like you say!!! I unsubscribed from a lot of natural YTers because I wanted to learn how to style my natural hair--not weaves, wigs or heat-training, not face-hair-growing-pills, etc. People love long hair, and unfortunately, will do anything to get quick results if they don't have to put in the effort. I saw a style online for kinky 4c hair that was a lot longer than my current length and instead of just getting a finger-comber (though I think it's cute), I really want to try to learn how to care for my own real hair once it gets past the length I'm used to. I figure in the 3 years it'll take me to get to that length if all goes okay, I will have learned how to not only braid and style, but I'll have learned how to stop inadvertently abusing my hair.

I started reading The Science of Black Hair recently, and I don't think it would be a bad thing if we could add more realistic and natural styling books to the mix like this one.
Go for it, I say!
naturaldoll likes this.



Last Relaxer: 12/24/2012
Weekly Products I'm Using:
VO5 Silky Experiences Coconut Milk Conditioner
KCKT
Grapeseed Oil
my hair is normal-ish porosity / dense / fine+medium strands
Oh, don't get me wrong. I'm a YT addict and I have learned a lot from it. I think as part of the Internet era some people are believing because someone bought a web camera so they're an expert or since they read it on line then it must be true. And sometimes the things being suggested to people aren't so safe. The ability of discernment is a powerful thing.


I have that same book. I haven't look at it in a long time to remember what it's about.
Some of the biggest BS is some of these videos labeled black hair growth. There is one woman with a video about what she is going to use to grow her hair then next video she brags how good her results where but she timmed two inches before the follow up so we can't see it. Yeah right. Then there is a lady with long hair saying how some vitamin drink grew her hair. But then I saw a follow where she is mad someone called her out for not disclosing in the first video she is a distributor. She goes on how she is a Christian and she was just trying to help people. Well to me not saying she worked for the company while endorsing a product is unethical and unethical last I checked isn't very Christianlike. Don't get me started on the make your own JBCO video or heat damage and heat training are not the same thing videos. I mean chicks with thin scraggly no edges hair are making videos like they are experts. And I unsubbed Glamfun not just because she relaxed but because the reason(s) she gave kept changing and were sketchy. Sorry I don't believe a derm told her to relax her hair to treat a scalp condition knowing what relaxers can do to scalps. Plus my doctor told me and I know many others whose doctors told them to stop using chemicals when dealing with hair loss. But then the other story she gave was she was going on vacation and didn't want to deal with her hair and relaxed it. Two very different tales and I think the second is true but she wanted convince people she had to do it so she made that up.
Originally Posted by adthomas
On the one hand, I was so happy when I discovered people were putting their beauty and hair routines on YT a couple of years ago. If I had known that/had that type of information was offered in 1999, 2000, 2005 and 2008, I probably wouldn't have accepted the answer, "You should just relax it/weave it" when my roots were growing out and I wanted to do something to style my hair. Or, getting really well-meaning family friends who were natural giving me completely not useful books like "Textured Tresses: The Ultimate Guide to Maintaining and Styling Natural Hair."

So, I'm really grateful for all the stuff on YT.

That said, a lot of it is ridiculous, like you say!!! I unsubscribed from a lot of natural YTers because I wanted to learn how to style my natural hair--not weaves, wigs or heat-training, not face-hair-growing-pills, etc. People love long hair, and unfortunately, will do anything to get quick results if they don't have to put in the effort. I saw a style online for kinky 4c hair that was a lot longer than my current length and instead of just getting a finger-comber (though I think it's cute), I really want to try to learn how to care for my own real hair once it gets past the length I'm used to. I figure in the 3 years it'll take me to get to that length if all goes okay, I will have learned how to not only braid and style, but I'll have learned how to stop inadvertently abusing my hair.

I started reading The Science of Black Hair recently, and I don't think it would be a bad thing if we could add more realistic and natural styling books to the mix like this one.
Go for it, I say!
Originally Posted by pinkpostitheart
Oh, don't get me wrong. I'm a YT addict and I have learned a lot from it. I think as part of the Internet era some people are believing because someone bought a web camera so they're an expert or since they read it on line then it must be true. And sometimes the things being suggested to people aren't so safe. The ability of discernment is a powerful thing.


I have that same book. I haven't look at it in a long time to
Originally Posted by adthomas

God I loved that book. Just pure science. No tomfoolery


Sent from my SCH-I545 using CurlTalk App
Last relaxer: Nov. 24, 2008
BC: December 19, 2009
Products: Whatever works!
Oh, don't get me wrong. I'm a YT addict and I have learned a lot from it. I think as part of the Internet era some people are believing because someone bought a web camera so they're an expert or since they read it on line then it must be true. And sometimes the things being suggested to people aren't so safe. The ability of discernment is a powerful thing.


I have that same book. I haven't look at it in a long time to
Originally Posted by adthomas

God I loved that book. Just pure science. No tomfoolery


Sent from my SCH-I545 using CurlTalk App
Originally Posted by gagirl09
I have the Textured Tresses book not the other one.
Reading "The Science of Black Hair" kept me from being falling for the okie doke you can encounter on YouTube. Thankfully I read in my early days of going back natural.

texture - medium/fine, porosity - low/normal, elasticity - normal
co-wash - NaturelleGrow Coconut Water or Marshmallow Root, Slippery Elm Bark & Blue Malva Cleansing Conditioners
LI - KCKT mixed w/ SM C & H Curl & Style Milk
DC - NG Mango & Coconut H2O or Chamomile/Brdck Root
Gel - SM souffle (winter), KCCC (summer) or CR Naturals Aloe Whipped Butter Gel (year round)
Sealers - Virgin Coconut Oil, Avocado butter, Aloe butter
Ayurvedic treatments - Jamila Henna, Sukesh, Aloe Vera Powder, Hibiscus Powder
.




Wow!

Standing around minding my own business I happen to look up as a bus goes pass.

On the side of it is advertising a relaxer.

First one I've seen on a London bus.
Wow!

Standing around minding my own business I happen to look up as a bus goes pass.

On the side of it is advertising a relaxer.

First one I've seen on a London bus.
Originally Posted by Blueblood
I have never seen a relaxer ad on a bus either. Seems odd because usually relaxers ads are target marketing so usually in magazines on on BET. and not directed to the general public like a bus ad would be.
Wow!

Standing around minding my own business I happen to look up as a bus goes pass.

On the side of it is advertising a relaxer.

First one I've seen on a London bus.
Originally Posted by Blueblood
I have never seen a relaxer ad on a bus either. Seems odd because usually relaxers ads are target marketing so usually in magazines on on BET. and not directed to the general public like a bus ad would be.
Originally Posted by adthomas
Desperate times calls for desperate measures. Relaxer companies are feeling the hit, since "going back to natural" has become more mainstream.

texture - medium/fine, porosity - low/normal, elasticity - normal
co-wash - NaturelleGrow Coconut Water or Marshmallow Root, Slippery Elm Bark & Blue Malva Cleansing Conditioners
LI - KCKT mixed w/ SM C & H Curl & Style Milk
DC - NG Mango & Coconut H2O or Chamomile/Brdck Root
Gel - SM souffle (winter), KCCC (summer) or CR Naturals Aloe Whipped Butter Gel (year round)
Sealers - Virgin Coconut Oil, Avocado butter, Aloe butter
Ayurvedic treatments - Jamila Henna, Sukesh, Aloe Vera Powder, Hibiscus Powder
.




Wow. Someone who I never ever would have expected to go natural messaged me today that she bc'ed. When I saw her a few months ago I did notice edges were shot but I am still surprised. I guess the companies must really struggling for real.
[

Desperate times calls for desperate measures. Relaxer companies are feeling the hit, since "going back to natural" has become more mainstream.
Originally Posted by juanab
I saw a commercial. I'm 27 and I never really recall ever seeing a commercial. Maybe I have been living under a rock.

Anywhoodle I am getting my first full enclosure(?-no hair will be left out) sew in tomorrow and I am already nervous. I am nervous because the hair is differently colored from my hair( color 30). Not only that is is a short, very short style and I read a thread about the issue with short weaves is it poofing up in the back. I wanted to keep it in for three months. Then I am nervous because my sister said something about getting a full enclosure but then the girl said I didn't need one and then I saw a video and a woman who did the pixie style cut I kind of want said she used an enclosure. I don't even know what that is. *sigh.* I'm just so nervous.
Last relaxer: Nov. 24, 2008
BC: December 19, 2009
Products: Whatever works!
I have spent most of the day watching Many Rivers To Cross which is a documentary by Dr. Henry Luis Gates covering 500 years of black American history. I learned so much about our triumphs and struggles. And I felt moved to tears at the end thinking of the hardships our people faced with All those centuries of abuse. but we never gave up hope even when our oppressors would publically execute us, dehumanize us, rape us, make us feel inferior. Yet ultimately They could never break our spirit.There were always people who stood up to injustice even if it meant losing their lives. One man said he saw no shame in being descended from slaves and he was proud of it. I feel the same way. Thank God they were strong enough to endure and overcome and work for something better for their children or I wouldn't be where I am today. And at the end Dr. Gates talked about how our people had inspired people around the world to continue their fight for freedom and equality.All people are all created equal.
[

Desperate times calls for desperate measures. Relaxer companies are feeling the hit, since "going back to natural" has become more mainstream.
Originally Posted by juanab
I saw a commercial. I'm 27 and I never really recall ever seeing a commercial. Maybe I have been living under a rock.

Anywhoodle I am getting my first full enclosure(?-no hair will be left out) sew in tomorrow and I am already nervous. I am nervous because the hair is differently colored from my hair( color 30). Not only that is is a short, very short style and I read a thread about the issue with short weaves is it poofing up in the back. I wanted to keep it in for three months. Then I am nervous because my sister said something about getting a full enclosure but then the girl said I didn't need one and then I saw a video and a woman who did the pixie style cut I kind of want said she used an enclosure. I don't even know what that is. *sigh.* I'm just so nervous.
Originally Posted by gagirl09
Disclaimer I am know practically nothing about weave but is it straight or curly? I would think whether to get enclosure would rest on how well the hair blends. Won't you have to flat iron a lot if you leave hair out on straight weave?
I'm not leaving any hair out. I got a color 30 and I want it all over my hair.it will be straight predominately. I purchased Saga Gold
Last relaxer: Nov. 24, 2008
BC: December 19, 2009
Products: Whatever works!
Wow!

Standing around minding my own business I happen to look up as a bus goes pass.

On the side of it is advertising a relaxer.

First one I've seen on a London bus.
Originally Posted by Blueblood
I have never seen a relaxer ad on a bus either. Seems odd because usually relaxers ads are target marketing so usually in magazines on on BET. and not directed to the general public like a bus ad would be.
Originally Posted by adthomas
Desperate times calls for desperate measures. Relaxer companies are feeling the hit, since "going back to natural" has become more mainstream.
Originally Posted by juanab
Thing is putting it on a bus will probably backfire.

In the UK once more White people knew about skin lightening creams from adverts in magazines etc aimed at White women, journalists were able to talk to dermatologists and find people with damaged skin. This lead to certain ingredients being restricted then banned. The dermatologists had been campaigning for decades for this to happen but the change in advertising helped.
I'm feeling a little guilty. My cousin messaged me she bc'ed and asked for tips. She is like many of us in that she hasn't been natural since a young child. I gave her some general thoughts and suggested she go to YT, Curly Nikki but not here. I had my own selfish reasons in that I like coming on here and talking with people many of whom I consider friends but don't actually know in real life so not so judgmental. Having her on here reading my posts would really make me feel I could not be as open with my feelings especially with anything family related. Plus because of some past things she has done to me I am not completely over some of my resentment.And I'm 100% sure she senses it. I am trying but I think it would go a long way if she actually apologized.

Should I suggest she join NC? Am I being petty?

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