Hey-lo!

I'm not really a products buff, but this is what I use:
Suave Conditioner, Arbonne Tea Tree Shampoo (rarely), Carol's Daughter Vanilla Spray, sometimes the Elixir in DTs and prepoos... some homemade avocado butter that a friend gave me... I have a heat protectant spray for when I iron, BEDHEAD I think... I have also used that Aussie Moist, but I ran out months ago, and haven't bought more. I love it, but I just don't ever remember.

That's about it!

There is no Target, but there is one a few hours away...

Here's my experience with shingling (it's like the Tightly Curly method, no?) Using conditioner, aussie moist, and any kind of butter I've devised, (and I do have a garnier creamy gel that I bought just for the shingling) I sectioned the hair further after my shower. I loaded up each section with product, brushed with the denman, then started pulling it apart and working towards the clumping part. I get some pretty clumps, but they don't dry pretty... And I never finger detangle, it takes crazy long, and as the strands pull across and rub on each other, they catch more hairs causing it to just get tangled up on the other end anyways. And again, I don't like touching my hair.

I got it all denman-ed and teezer-ed and half of it had shrunken up (where I started) and the other half was slowly crawling upwards. It also had swelled outwards (I like my hair against my scalp if loose, otherwise it just turns into a fuzzy mess as soon as it dries). So, i worked towards pulling it together, back, and getting it into a poof (which I don't do anymore, too many scraggly ends, too annoying to wrap). By the time it had dried, it was stuck. I think my strands do something with product that turn it into tacky glue, so that the next day, or once it dries, trying to undo it and "refresh it" is just starting all over again.

I'm lazy. I'm sure all of this would be better if I had someone doing it for me, or if I could drive somewhere on a regular basis. But loose natural styles, not twists, braided, or sectioned hair, dries into a lifeless, dull mess and breaks along the shaft.

I'm thinking of trying the "diffuser" idea! I lost the attachment for my dryer ages ago, but I'll come up with something!

Hey chica,
So yikes, I wouldn't drive that far for a target, I'd just order online. I recommend you try a gel and see how you like it. It will stretch your roots and make it less likely you get mats or tangles. So you might want to try ordering a cheap gel like eco-styler on amazon.com
Amazon.com: Eco Styler Styling Gel 32 oz. Blue Jar: Beauty
I would caution you to use the gel in combination with a leave-in conditioner to keep your hair from drying out. Shingling is different from the tightly curly method. You essentially apply gel to your hair in sections, spreading the gel from root to tip with your fingers after applying a leave-in while your hair is soaking wet. If you get too much crunch with eco-styler but you like the look of the results, try a lighter gel like Amazon.com: Kiss My Face Upper Management Styling Gel 8 oz.: Bobby Thompson: Beauty.
I think you'll like the results.
Also check out this video on shingling
Video: Wash n Go using Eco Styler Gel

Has anyone tried this KinkyCurly business?

I just watched this video:
Kinky-Curly Hair Products Demo - YouTube

It would be my DREAM to have that hair, hair that laid down, even if it stood from the scalp a bit, but to actually stay down. I'm going to finally spend some money on products, so anything you can think of for long, 4a? hair would be ideal. Just to keep it LONG, and not shrinking.

It's the shrinking that kills me.

**Actually, nix that video. I wan't this girls hair! Do You Know Your Hair Growth Potential? - YouTube

@shainala: speak to me of the DM HAir whip. I am trying to decide whether to order some. I am looking for a good, glycerin-free, silicone-free moisturizer for second-day and farther hair which will not add any hardness. I have tried SM Curl Milk and some MyHoneyChild products, but my hair feels moisturized yet "hard" after use. You seem to use some of the same products I use (KCCC, EcoStyler Blue, KMF Upper Management) so I wondered what your experience has been.

So I bought it on a whim, and I was kinda nervous because I am not a fan of the DM miracurl curling gelly ( think it smells a little bit like a bathroom air freshener and the dews are still a bit too low for glycerin based product anyway). Anyway, I ordered the DM Hair Whip because I needed to buy 50 dollars of AveYou products to get 25% off (i'm a pj who loves a deal). It arrived two weeks ago and I was having a kinda weird hair day because it started drizzling on my way home. I had already put Upper Management gel in my hair in the morning and I was getting ready to go out to dinner so I decided to put some Hair Whip in. I was so happy with the result. It reinvigorated the hold a bit and tamed the frizzies without being crunchy at all. It still looked good in the morning when I added a little more to refresh my mushed hair. I don't really get third day hair because I'm a lazy sleeper and (while I use a satin pillowcase)I do not wrap my hair at night. I wouldn't use it without having previously put gel in my hair. I don't think it has enough hold for that. But I like it as a refresher and I find it really moisturizing and light. It plays well with all my gels. I'm loving it.
oh and p.s. it doesn't have glycerin and it doesn't smell like a bathroom air freshener

Hey all!

This is my first post, but I've been doing research on this site for ages! I'm 24, and I've been natural for a long time. I attached some photos where you can see my shrunken hair, and my straightened hair (the straight one with the yellow shirt was just two days ago).

I'm extremely passionate about my hair--aren't we all? But after reading around, I've been noticing that many naturals or "new" naturals have been shutting down people thinking about texlaxing, or getting a Keratin. I understand that it's a damaging, permanent chemical process. But to tell someone who clearly has issues and difficulties with their hair to just keep on keepin' on, and to just use YouTube to find out more about how to take care of their hair, is just defeating the purpose of even commenting.

I've been natural for so long, and no, it isn't easy. It doesn't make me happy, or like I'm changing the world by being natural. My hair is LONG, I started from almost a buzz (I was "accidentally" big chopped at a white hair salon) and now my hair is to my mid-lower back after cutting off about 3 inches for evenness. I pride myself in the patience and care I've taken to achieve my length. I only apply heat once or twice a year to check my length, and have worn protective "tied-down" styles since I was born. Even after straightening, I tie it back down. (I am mixed, white/black, with 4B hair) And I'm not proud to wear a fro. It's been ingrained in me since I was a child that I need my hair fixed, relaxed, straightened, or covered up to go into public--and that's what I've done my entire life.

So, onwards from that, when my hair gets wet, it mats up. I have one pic with my hair wet that was taken 5 years ago, the last time I dared to get my hair wet, and leave the shower to take a pic without it being detangled, braided or twisted in the shower before getting out. Right after that picture, I tried to manage it and ended up getting back in the shower for 30 mins just to stop it from sticking, locking, and matting up (it's instantaneous).

There's another pic where my hair is long, and I'm wearing a red sportsbra. It's lightly curled-looking, but that was last summer (1-2 times a year!) after being straightened and tied down for week. I have a prepoo in there, of olive oil, and some light conditioners and butters. I wish my hair was like that ALL THE TIME. But alas, the moment water touched it, it shrunk the 75% and I spent the next 75 minutes trying to detangle it in the shower.

I just straightened my hair again, the protective styles (twists, usually tied down) tend to let my ends rub on fabric or just get dry from... well, not being touched. I hate touching my hair, for fear of messing up whatever's going on up there. But the moment I put the iron down I started counting the minutes before it would need to be washed again, and I'd have to wait another 6+ months to have manageable, non-matting, hair.

So I'm considering some sort of texturizer, some sort of ANYTHING to cut down my detangling time, my stress time, everything. I could CRY, I feel so ugly when my hair is in a fro, for the entire time it's wet and I'm trying to pull it back together. It's been 10 years of being natural, growing my hair long (no, I wont cut it) and I almost feel ashamed to want to go back to a process, like the last 10 years would've been for nothing. Though, without going natural and wearing protective styles, I would never have gained this length.

And when I say I feel ugly, I live in a very rural, very white area. I was the first black person to graduate from a high school in the entire COUNTY. My husband is white--Finnish, and I have no family left of my own. When I do twists, people think "cool!" but if I do anything else (big braids to get it tied down quickly before running out of the house, or trying to soak it with conditioner long enough to use a tangle teezer in sections to PULL IT BACK--ultimately ending up with a big solid mass of matted hair, and more hair breakage) I've had people look at me like... what's the black girl think she's doing?

I've had a male friend, walk up to me in public, where I WORK and ask me "What's going on with your hair?" I've had local white stylists parade me around to their stylist-students to check out black hair, and have had, by the same stylist, a walmart plastic bag thrown over my head in order to get me under the dryer because her hair caps didn't fit. I've had stylists make jokes about my hair, make me a spectacle, and just flat out walk away from my hair and send me on my way because it was past 3 hours.

It's like my hair is my main source of pride, but also the ONE thing that makes me feel terrible about myself, and embarrassed to go outside (thankfully, I work at home now).

I just need some sort of.. sympathy, support, please?

**Note, apparently I might not be 4B! I'm in there somewhere though... Suggest some other types... I'm the only who's seen and touched my hair since the bc, who knows some stuff about naturals!

Hey I am a newbie here so I don't know much however have u tried putting your hair in twist before you wet it or shampoo it? I've heard this is essential for naturals with longer hair.

Hey Hey! I'm new here too

Do you mean putting my hair in twists, then washing each section individually, taking the twists out each time? Or just putting it in twists, washing the twists and leaving them that way?

I know an anonymous message from a stranger across the world doesn't make much difference in what you face and feel everyday, but your hair is beautiful, and not just because it's long. And you are beautiful too, with a baby face! You could pass for 18 in my eyes!

Aww, you're so very sweet! Sometimes I feel like I look twice my age, other times, I look like I'm 12.

Anyway, it sounds like you don't really have many people to trust from the people around you, however, you said you're married. What does your husband think? I bet he thinks you're beautiful! If you run the pros and cons of everything past him, maybe you could make a decision on what to do together?

My husband loves how I look, which is always a confidence boost. I honestly get more compliments from him when I have twists pulled back with a flower than when I've spent 3 hours straightening it. We are planning on moving, somehow, though it will be difficult for him to be away from his family and the church. Thankfully, where we're looking, the same church is there... and the same Finnish culture. All the way in Washington State!

(Also, you look familiar, like you've posted on other forums before or you have a Fotki I've stalked? No??) I probably have posted somewhere before, I just can't really remember. I think I may have posted in Curly Nikki before, I also had a tiny untagged video on YT from years ago. I'm not sure! What's a Fotki?

If you do not want the color of henna, try cassia or neutral henna. You get the same benefits without the color. Do your research before the plunge. I have never looked back.