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-   -   Hubby is white and has black man hair... What to do with it?! (http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/4/157754-hubby-white-has-black-man-hair-what-do.html)

Curls&Agape 04-27-2013 09:56 AM

Hubby is white and has black man hair... What to do with it?!
 
My husband has amazingly unique hair. You see he is white... With no African or any other black descent whatsoever.... Yet his hair is freakin Curly... Like it must be 4b or 4c. The other day at work he was serving and African American fellow, and the guy stops mid-sentence, looks at hubby's hair in surprise, smiles and goes "hey! You've got hair like a brother!" Hahaha. His parents don't have curls.... Nor anyone down the line that we know. Odd throwback I guess..

Anyways his hair doesn't feel like hair. It feel like... Wool... Like a lamb but not soft. It just feels like its not hair. It's insanely dry and it's soooo curly... If he lets it grow any longer than about 8cm, it begins to curl into itself and form dreadlocks. Perfect ones. He has grown natural dreadlocks before... Got them to about mid-back length... But they started to get too heavy and it pulled on his scalp which gave him dandruff and a sore scalp so he cut them all off and started again.

He now has a mini-afro. All he has to do is use his fingers, or an afro comb and it sticks out heaps haha. Like a fuzzy halo. I adore his hair, but I think it needs some TLC.

Judging by what I've said... What is the best option to give his hair a full on moisture hit? He currently washes (sulfate free shampoo) and then leaves a boatload of good quality conditioner in his hair every 3 days. He uses no product except the occasional use of curly girl friendly gel for special occasions. Tonight I put coconut oil in his hair. My hair is only 3A, and I can only put a tiny bit of coconut oil in, like a teaspoon to a tablespoon and my hair looks oily and wet (until my hair eats it overnight) but I had used a large handful in his hair (it's only about 8-10cm long at its longest point on the top, without pulling.) and it looked like i hadn't put anything in there. Looked like he has a few measily raindrops in his hair.....

So hmmm. What to use? No too expensive we are on a strict budget .
Thanks!

BeautyisMiree 04-27-2013 10:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Curls&Agape (Post 2159375)
My husband has amazingly unique hair. You see he is white... With no African or any other black descent whatsoever.... Yet his hair is freakin Curly... Like it must be 4b or 4c. The other day at work he was serving and African American fellow, and the guy stops mid-sentence, looks at hubby's hair in surprise, smiles and goes "hey! You've got hair like a brother!" Hahaha. His parents don't have curls.... Nor anyone down the line that we know. Odd throwback I guess..

Anyways his hair doesn't feel like hair. It feel like... Wool... Like a lamb but not soft. It just feels like its not hair. It's insanely dry and it's soooo curly... If he lets it grow any longer than about 8cm, it begins to curl into itself and form dreadlocks. Perfect ones. He has grown natural dreadlocks before... Got them to about mid-back length... But they started to get too heavy and it pulled on his scalp which gave him dandruff and a sore scalp so he cut them all off and started again.

He now has a mini-afro. All he has to do is use his fingers, or an afro comb and it sticks out heaps haha. Like a fuzzy halo. I adore his hair, but I think it needs some TLC.

Judging by what I've said... What is the best option to give his hair a full on moisture hit? He currently washes (sulfate free shampoo) and then leaves a boatload of good quality conditioner in his hair every 3 days. He uses no product except the occasional use of curly girl friendly gel for special occasions. Tonight I put coconut oil in his hair. My hair is only 3A, and I can only put a tiny bit of coconut oil in, like a teaspoon to a tablespoon and my hair looks oily and wet (until my hair eats it overnight) but I had used a large handful in his hair (it's only about 8-10cm long at its longest point on the top, without pulling.) and it looked like i hadn't put anything in there. Looked like he has a few measily raindrops in his hair.....

So hmmm. What to use? No too expensive we are on a strict budget .
Thanks!

There is no such thing as black man hair. Races aren't reserved for a certain hair type meaning you can be straight from Nigeria with 3a hair.

Men and women take care of their hair very differently. If your husband is trying to grow long hair then I can help him out in that department, but if he wants short hair.

Do a Avocado mask hair treatment because it leaves my hair feeling very soft. All you need is avocado, honey, Greek yogurt and that's it.

Curls&Agape 04-27-2013 07:28 PM

You sound offended. If so, I'm sorry, I didn't intend to come off offensively. Perhaps i should have worded the title differently or something. Yes, I'm well aware that not all black, or, coloured people have curly hair. That's obvious... But where I'm from, it is extremely rare for any fully white man or woman to have 4b 4c wooly afro hair. It's pretty much unheard of. Hubby gets ALOT of comments and complements on his hair because it is so unusual of someone of his pale complexion to have such hair. That's what I was getting at. Yes, race are not reserved to a certain hair type. My hubby is living proof of that. But stereotypes ring true sometimes, and here in Australia, people with his kind of curls are 99% of the time, very dark. We've only seen one other person who was white with his hair, and they had African descendants way back a few generations. Maybe in other countries its more common. Not here.

Thanks for the avocado tip, ill definitely give it a try. He isn't interested in getting it long. It seems to grow pretty well on its own anyway. But he was hoping to get it healthier. Moisturized. Maybe a little softer??

Thanks again.

Lovemenappy 04-27-2013 08:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Curls&Agape (Post 2159539)
You sound offended. If so, I'm sorry, I didn't intend to come off offensively. Perhaps i should have worded the title differently or something. Yes, I'm well aware that not all black, or, coloured people have curly hair. That's obvious... But where I'm from, it is extremely rare for any fully white man or woman to have 4b 4c wooly afro hair. It's pretty much unheard of. Hubby gets ALOT of comments and complements on his hair because it is so unusual of someone of his pale complexion to have such hair. That's what I was getting at. Yes, race are not reserved to a certain hair type. My hubby is living proof of that. But stereotypes ring true sometimes, and here in Australia, people with his kind of curls are 99% of the time, very dark. We've only seen one other person who was white with his hair, and they had African descendants way back a few generations. Maybe in other countries its more common. Not here.

Thanks for the avocado tip, ill definitely give it a try. He isn't interested in getting it long. It seems to grow pretty well on its own anyway. But he was hoping to get it healthier. Moisturized. Maybe a little softer??

Thanks again.

I know what you mean and I personally wasnt offended at all. I think a lot of times people get so wrapped up in the pc terminology regarding hair. There is no such thing as "black hair" but I think we all know that it is not common place to see white men walking around with 4b textured hair just as it is not common place to see black women with naturally silky straight hair. Also, I take it you were referencing moreso the texture...not a big deal, no worries. :)

Does he have a prob with detangling? I personally like the Oyin Hair Dew. :)

adthomas 04-27-2013 11:17 PM

I think you try doing a weekly deep condtiOner. I like mixing banana baby food with honey but everyone has their favs. Just adding oil to my hair would do nothing for it unless I was sitting under a dryer.

I think race is pretty irrelevant so I usually avoid race hair care questions. But i want to know how do you know your husband is 100 percent white? I guess you are basing his whiteness on his complexion but not all people considered non-white are dark. several of my relatives have lighter skin than a lot of "white" people and there is no recent white person in my family. Truth is most people are not all anything and long ago traits can sometimes surface. There is a movie called Skin about a white South African couple who had black kids because they likely both had traces of black blood and didn't know it but the recessive traits connected and batabambataboom. Aren't native Australians persecuted? here in the US there were a lot of multirace people who could pass for white who did to escape Jim Crow and be able to live more comfortably as white people. They moved away from home, disowned their families and went to live as if they were "just white" people. So maybe somebody somewhere down the line squirted some chocolate in yo milk.

chupie 04-27-2013 11:38 PM

All I could think of was "momma a 3 and daddy a 4 ... Your kids are going to have incredible curls."

KinkyChic 04-28-2013 10:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Curls&Agape (Post 2159375)
My husband has amazingly unique hair. You see he is white... With no African or any other black descent whatsoever.... Yet his hair is freakin Curly... Like it must be 4b or 4c. The other day at work he was serving and African American fellow, and the guy stops mid-sentence, looks at hubby's hair in surprise, smiles and goes "hey! You've got hair like a brother!" Hahaha. His parents don't have curls.... Nor anyone down the line that we know. Odd throwback I guess..

Anyways his hair doesn't feel like hair. It feel like... Wool... Like a lamb but not soft. It just feels like its not hair. It's insanely dry and it's soooo curly... If he lets it grow any longer than about 8cm, it begins to curl into itself and form dreadlocks. Perfect ones. He has grown natural dreadlocks before... Got them to about mid-back length... But they started to get too heavy and it pulled on his scalp which gave him dandruff and a sore scalp so he cut them all off and started again.

He now has a mini-afro. All he has to do is use his fingers, or an afro comb and it sticks out heaps haha. Like a fuzzy halo. I adore his hair, but I think it needs some TLC.

Judging by what I've said... What is the best option to give his hair a full on moisture hit? He currently washes (sulfate free shampoo) and then leaves a boatload of good quality conditioner in his hair every 3 days. He uses no product except the occasional use of curly girl friendly gel for special occasions. Tonight I put coconut oil in his hair. My hair is only 3A, and I can only put a tiny bit of coconut oil in, like a teaspoon to a tablespoon and my hair looks oily and wet (until my hair eats it overnight) but I had used a large handful in his hair (it's only about 8-10cm long at its longest point on the top, without pulling.) and it looked like i hadn't put anything in there. Looked like he has a few measily raindrops in his hair.....

So hmmm. What to use? No too expensive we are on a strict budget .
Thanks!

Giovanni products (50/50, Tea Tree Conditioner, Smooth As Silk, Direct Leave In is my favorite). Giovanni's Brazillian line is good also. After he washes and conditions, maybe a curl cream or paste or something to define (I know guys can be all macho about their hair products so I'm not very familiar with guy products). I know that Target has some that are specifically for men or more masculine. Maybe a liquid gel or even mousse?? Giovanni has mousse in their line up too as well as Shea Moisture.

CurlyCutie1394 04-28-2013 10:46 AM

He needs to deep condition more I guess

BeautyisMiree 04-28-2013 04:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Curls&Agape (Post 2159539)
You sound offended. If so, I'm sorry, I didn't intend to come off offensively. Perhaps i should have worded the title differently or something. Yes, I'm well aware that not all black, or, coloured people have curly hair. That's obvious... But where I'm from, it is extremely rare for any fully white man or woman to have 4b 4c wooly afro hair. It's pretty much unheard of. Hubby gets ALOT of comments and complements on his hair because it is so unusual of someone of his pale complexion to have such hair. That's what I was getting at. Yes, race are not reserved to a certain hair type. My hubby is living proof of that. But stereotypes ring true sometimes, and here in Australia, people with his kind of curls are 99% of the time, very dark. We've only seen one other person who was white with his hair, and they had African descendants way back a few generations. Maybe in other countries its more common. Not here.

Thanks for the avocado tip, ill definitely give it a try. He isn't interested in getting it long. It seems to grow pretty well on its own anyway. But he was hoping to get it healthier. Moisturized. Maybe a little softer??

Thanks again.

Deep conditioning is a great way to soften up your hair. Get Greek yogurt and put in castor, olive, and coconut oil along with a rinse out conditioner.
Put it in your husband's hair and leave him under a hooded dryer for 30-60 mins. If you don't have a hooded dryer then a shower cap on his head then a plastic bag over the shower cap. Use a blow dryer between the plastic bag because it will heat up the hair cuticles keeping them moisturized and soft.

Curls&Agape 04-28-2013 10:04 PM

Wow!! Thanks everyone for the different tips and methods... I wonder how many hubby will let me experiment on him!

Adthomas: hahahaha you cracked me up. Chock in milk lollll. My hubby is a mix-breed lolll but European descent. German and Dutch. Both of who are profoundly "white". We were once told that there may have been random tribes in German mountains yrs and yrs ago.... Hmmm. To answer your question, Native Aussies (aboriginals) were treated horrifically back when Australia first colonized. It is a shameful story. Since then though I believe they have been more than compensated (as much as possible). Now they get extremely generous government handouts and everything handed to them on a silver platter, and also received a national apology from our prime minister (president). It is a shame things have turned out the way they have. Unfortunately many of them are dole bludgers who have been injected with a hate for whites for what our ancestors did to them. I believe the next generation should take the opportunity to make peace between each other and to make the most of the future they have been given. Some of them are doing so and it's inspirational. Us young folk shouldn't be fighting our great great grandparents war. It's over. Keep it that way. Lolll not really a hair topic I know.

Chupie: our daughter has amazing 3c curls! Our son doesn't have much hair yet but I can see a twirl or two in there, I think he may have my hair :-)

Curls&Agape 04-28-2013 10:10 PM

Oh and just to add to the multi-racial vibe going off here, I was born and raised in Australia, but my parents made a mongrel. I'm of Italian, Irish and Spanish descent lollll

naturaldoll 04-30-2013 01:52 PM

ummms....that silver platter stuff isn't very nice, considering the hell the aboriginal people have been through since white people first arrived in austrailia. not very racially harmonious either. sounds downright, unapologetic and racist. I strongly STRONGLY advise a edit of the whole section, otherwise...well you'll see.

*ducking for cover*

annabananalise 04-30-2013 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Curls&Agape (Post 2159898)
Wow!! Thanks everyone for the different tips and methods... I wonder how many hubby will let me experiment on him!

Adthomas: hahahaha you cracked me up. Chock in milk lollll. My hubby is a mix-breed lolll but European descent. German and Dutch. Both of who are profoundly "white". We were once told that there may have been random tribes in German mountains yrs and yrs ago.... Hmmm. To answer your question, Native Aussies (aboriginals) were treated horrifically back when Australia first colonized. It is a shameful story. Since then though I believe they have been more than compensated (as much as possible). Now they get extremely generous government handouts and everything handed to them on a silver platter, and also received a national apology from our prime minister (president). It is a shame things have turned out the way they have. Unfortunately many of them are dole bludgers who have been injected with a hate for whites for what our ancestors did to them. I believe the next generation should take the opportunity to make peace between each other and to make the most of the future they have been given. Some of them are doing so and it's inspirational. Us young folk shouldn't be fighting our great great grandparents war. It's over. Keep it that way. Lolll not really a hair topic I know.

Chupie: our daughter has amazing 3c curls! Our son doesn't have much hair yet but I can see a twirl or two in there, I think he may have my hair :-)

Oh wow you sure did try it.

"They got an apology from the prime minister, why are they still upset over centuries of oppression/violence/racism? I think it's over bc I think they have everything given to them via handouts. Never mind Australia is still super racist and still oppresses natives. I didn't personally do anything to them so I cant imagine whyyyy they'd be resentful."

0.5/10. Argument is ineffective.

BeautyisMiree 04-30-2013 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Curls&Agape (Post 2159898)
Wow!! Thanks everyone for the different tips and methods... I wonder how many hubby will let me experiment on him!

Adthomas: hahahaha you cracked me up. Chock in milk lollll. My hubby is a mix-breed lolll but European descent. German and Dutch. Both of who are profoundly "white". We were once told that there may have been random tribes in German mountains yrs and yrs ago.... Hmmm. To answer your question, Native Aussies (aboriginals) were treated horrifically back when Australia first colonized. It is a shameful story. Since then though I believe they have been more than compensated (as much as possible). Now they get extremely generous government handouts and everything handed to them on a silver platter, and also received a national apology from our prime minister (president). It is a shame things have turned out the way they have. Unfortunately many of them are dole bludgers who have been injected with a hate for whites for what our ancestors did to them. I believe the next generation should take the opportunity to make peace between each other and to make the most of the future they have been given. Some of them are doing so and it's inspirational. Us young folk shouldn't be fighting our great great grandparents war. It's over. Keep it that way. Lolll not really a hair topic I know.

Chupie: our daughter has amazing 3c curls! Our son doesn't have much hair yet but I can see a twirl or two in there, I think he may have my hair :-)

It's the same way as to why blacks don't like white people that much in America. You try to suppress all the pain that you caused years ago and then you still don't treat us as equally. It doesn't matter if it happened 500 years ago nothing can compensate for the pain.

LoveInBetween 04-30-2013 03:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Curls&Agape (Post 2159898)
Wow!! Thanks everyone for the different tips and methods... I wonder how many hubby will let me experiment on him!

Adthomas: hahahaha you cracked me up. Chock in milk lollll. My hubby is a mix-breed lolll but European descent. German and Dutch. Both of who are profoundly "white". We were once told that there may have been random tribes in German mountains yrs and yrs ago.... Hmmm. To answer your question, Native Aussies (aboriginals) were treated horrifically back when Australia first colonized. It is a shameful story. Since then though I believe they have been more than compensated (as much as possible). Now they get extremely generous government handouts and everything handed to them on a silver platter, and also received a national apology from our prime minister (president). It is a shame things have turned out the way they have. Unfortunately many of them are dole bludgers who have been injected with a hate for whites for what our ancestors did to them. I believe the next generation should take the opportunity to make peace between each other and to make the most of the future they have been given. Some of them are doing so and it's inspirational. Us young folk shouldn't be fighting our great great grandparents war. It's over. Keep it that way. Lolll not really a hair topic I know.

Chupie: our daughter has amazing 3c curls! Our son doesn't have much hair yet but I can see a twirl or two in there, I think he may have my hair :-)

I know you came here for suggestions and help for your hubby's hair and not to fight a racial battle with other members, so I'm here to help.


The things the other women suggested are great and I do reccomend you try them. If his hair looks's like type 4 hair, acts like type 4 hair, then it is 4 hair and thus should be treated as 4 hair. Type 4 requires an enormous amount of moisture, if it deprived of that moisture it will feel like wool. Start a regimen that includes deep conditioners, hot oil treatments with a hooded dyer or steamer is a good idea to help the product penetrate the hair shaft. Leave ins and sealing will make a difference in moisture retention. When he's styling his 'fro in the morning a quick spritz with water or a refresher will replace moisture that was lost due to being absorbed by the pillow case and bedding when sleeping.

My brother has 4 hair and had the same problem. After doing what I suggested, his fro is much softer and even has some shine.

With that said, I'm sure you'll see a difference.

Good luck with your hubby. (:


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scrills 04-30-2013 05:14 PM

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_me7x049Qi41qlbkes.gif

moodydove 04-30-2013 11:08 PM

Yikes...

wild~hair 05-01-2013 12:58 AM

We may have some sort of perfect storm situation happening here. Where to even begin ...

Sayoon 05-01-2013 02:04 AM

Drama caused by a random word ! Have fun

murrrcat 05-01-2013 10:08 AM

do the aboriginals live in 90,000 sqft mansions?

I've never been to Australia, so I don't know.
Cause that, is more than compensated.


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