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Old 07-12-2008, 07:32 PM   #41
 
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@SBB: Yes, like that. I think it might be too personal and sensitive in parts for a debate-type thread. Though of course, that shouldn't stop people from posting experiences/perspectives linked to previous postings. I think it would really clear the air.
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Old 07-12-2008, 07:41 PM   #42
 
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variety and style choices are one thing, but there is an unsaid or underlying motivation for those choices that i think alot of people are afraid to say that they have. if we're going to get anywhere and use this as a means of personal growth then its time we have an honest dialogue about things. i dont think its necessarily wrong for wanting your hair to hang but if you have hair that grows out instead of down, why waste time, energy, and money being unhappy that your hair doesnt hang down? ive been there and it sucks. trying to "control" my hair or "fight" shrinkage or frizz or whatever natural characteristics come with my hair type just isnt a good feeling.
Because that could be someone's passage in their natural journey and acceptance and joy of their own hair. Suppressing it doesn't help them evolve through it. I don't think it helps to guilt or shame someone for wanting something they may not have. The entire cosmetics industry is built on this.NFrom what I've read here and other boards, very few naturals come out of the egg fully hatched and loving the texture and state of her hair.
I agree with this, which is why I think subbrock's idea of a thread were people can be honest about some of the perspectives they have or have had and how these may or may not be linked to some remnants of a hair hierarchy would be a good thing.
thats what i was thinking. those feelings are a natural part of the journey (no pun intended) and i think it would be more than wonderful to be able to read and even respond to that part of the natural journey that most of us are too afraid to admit. there should be no guilt or shame in wanting something you dont have, but the point of it would be, you dont have to feel that way if you choose not to. supressing those feelings is the exact opposite of what a dialogue would be about. and we could even start right now because i KNOW i could tell some stories!

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Old 07-12-2008, 08:31 PM   #43
 
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Can I get loose on this topic for a sec?

For me, personally, IMHO (let me make it plain, I'm only speaking for moi), I absolutely adore my flexible, moldable, resilient hair in all its chunky, textured thickness. It's got big body. It can be frizzy like fog or as starkly-defined as the clearest night sky.

I love that we can wear it curly and high, stretch it straight and low, mold it into funky faux hawks, pull it back into a conservative buns or whimsical ponytails. We can rock it, pop it and loc it. We can even shave it all off and look amazing. I love exactly what God gave me (and us). He knew what He was doing when He made me (and us)... including the versatility and creativity He allowed us to have with our hair. My identity in Christ will always be more important to me than my hair and what the world thinks. I did it in West Texas, Bush country. If ever there's a place that gawks at natural hair, that's the place.

I'm far from perfect... but I'm trying to walk this walk, ya'll.

I've got nothing but love for you ladies. I respect your opinions. Can we get really real though? Sure, the pain of the past, the media (I used to work in the media, so I get it), the hurt and pain, all that stuff runs deep -- I know it's real to a lot of people. So I challenge you... do you want to make a change and help a woman or a girl get past the negativity that makes her think only straight hair is beautiful? After you read this post, find one girl and work strictly with her for one year on understanding her true beauty. (not my idea; this is derived from a prolific speaker at this year's annual MLK breakfast in NC)

For me, understanding my purpose and beauty according to God was the turning point to truly loving myself... and heavens, it's so much deeper than what we see in the mirror.
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Old 07-12-2008, 08:46 PM   #44
 
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I've got nothing but love for you ladies. I respect your opinions. Can we get really real though? Sure, the pain of the past, the media (I used to work in the media, so I get it), the hurt and pain, all that stuff runs deep -- I know it's real to a lot of people. So I challenge you... do you want to make a change and help a woman or a girl get past the negativity that makes her think only straight hair is beautiful? After you read this post, find one girl and work strictly with her for one year on understanding her true beauty. (not my idea; this is derived from a prolific speaker at this year's annual MLK breakfast in NC)

For me, understanding my purpose and beauty according to God was the turning point to truly loving myself... and heavens, it's so much deeper than what we see in the mirror.
thank you for you post shones! i totally agree with the whole "pay it forward" mentality.
funny story (or at least funny to me): several years back before i had ever met my SO or was ever pregnant i decided to prepare a little library of sorts for any future child i might have. i made sure to get books that showed the beauty of african americans and when i found the book nappy hair i thought i had died and gone to heaven! so i have all these books so that my kid would have something to look at with people that actually looked like him/her, who had brown skin and who had nappy hair and were proud of it...
sometimes when i see those books on the bookshelf and i look at my baby girl and im like, hmm. okay. well, there goes that plan. im going to share them with her anyway, but it still cracks me up to think about.
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Old 07-13-2008, 12:41 PM   #45
 
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I know what website you guys are talking about.

I was a member of that site for about a year until they started making people pay to post. At first, the website was cool. I liked the information about natural hair and I liked the pro-Black atmosphere. (I do have a little militant streak in me)

After a while, the website got to be a little too much. See, 3cs started to come to the website and post pictures and stuff. Some of the members would say that the 3cs didn't belong there and that the website was for nappy hair or 4a/b hair. It was terrible to see that division. The woman became preachy and wanted to tear down women who wore relaxers instead of show them how to transition and become natural.

Then, when members started to leave because they didn't want to pay, other members would make rude remarks about that.

I like NC.com a lot, but I'm with Empressri. There isn't a lot of information here about 4a/b hair. NC could stand to expand their information because there are a lot of 4's here. I know curly hair is curly hair, but 4 type hair does need a little bit more tender loving care than the 3s on up. Just being for real like everyone else has been.
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Old 07-13-2008, 06:19 PM   #46
 
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here's my spin on it:

ive been on np for about...3 years now. to my knowledge i haven't seen this division among the naps/curlies as some people say. now just because i havent seen it doesnt mean it hasn't happened, but to be honest i havent seen it.

i have a looser texture of hair and not once did i feel unwelcomed at np.

i think np needs to exist because it doesn't lie. there are so many sites you can join, but you don't always know the owner's motivation for starting their site.

it really is disheartening seeing black women fry, dye, and torture their hair until it is practically see through at the top, and they are doing this because heaven forbid they have the slightest kink in their hair. in the society we have now, it takes a great deal of nerve for some people to wear their hair natural, and some have to develop a thick skin to endure the ridicule they experience from their friends and family, nevermind the people that don't even know them.

np shows that you don't HAVE to straighten your hair or do this or do that to conform to other people's rules. unfortunately, there are TONS of people still stuck in that category, and those are the ones still perming and pressing consistently, and they wonder why their hair is falling out.

now obviously everyone doesn't have some of those issues, so if they want to perm/press/hell color their hair blue then FINE!! but really, those people have no reason to be on np, since it's anti-heat, anti-relaxer. and that's fine!!! there are plenty of other boards where you can freely discuss your other styling options without worrying about someone fussing you out.

the owner made her rules for a reason, which obviously everyone might not agree, and that's okay, but to reiterate im actually happy for those rules, because i learned so much, in terms of hair as well as other things.

on another note, the hair industry is a billion dollar if not more industry, where they keep promoting these relaxers and straighteners and blah blah blah. are they all blacked owned? hell to the no! are they worrying about black women frying their scalps or losing their hair temporarily if not permanently? get real! you know they aren't!

(hell, there are blacked owned shops putting extensions in for women, making them so tight their hairline starts receding. now you know that doesn't make any sense. a lot of people that are making products are out only to get the dollars put in their pockets. we all need to know that and make wise and informed decisions when it comes to our hair, our bodies and our health.)

ive seen people trying to go against the grain on np saying "well i press my hair and i still haven't lost it."

well great if that happened! but errr, if you're on an ANTI-HEAT hair forum, why the hell are you announcing that? it's like you're purposely trying to stir sh*t. if you don't like something, or don't agree, then don't participate.

i know of one person who was on np, and i believe got banned or something, and then she went to another site. now i dont know if she started it or just started moderating, but kudos to her. if you can't beat something, just move along somewhere else.

we all have to find our place at home on the internet, cause everything aint for everybody.
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Old 07-13-2008, 07:36 PM   #47
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shones View Post
Can I get loose on this topic for a sec?

For me, personally, IMHO (let me make it plain, I'm only speaking for moi), I absolutely adore my flexible, moldable, resilient hair in all its chunky, textured thickness. It's got big body. It can be frizzy like fog or as starkly-defined as the clearest night sky.

I love that we can wear it curly and high, stretch it straight and low, mold it into funky faux hawks, pull it back into a conservative buns or whimsical ponytails. We can rock it, pop it and loc it. We can even shave it all off and look amazing. I love exactly what God gave me (and us). He knew what He was doing when He made me (and us)... including the versatility and creativity He allowed us to have with our hair. My identity in Christ will always be more important to me than my hair and what the world thinks. I did it in West Texas, Bush country. If ever there's a place that gawks at natural hair, that's the place.

I'm far from perfect... but I'm trying to walk this walk, ya'll.

I've got nothing but love for you ladies. I respect your opinions. Can we get really real though? Sure, the pain of the past, the media (I used to work in the media, so I get it), the hurt and pain, all that stuff runs deep -- I know it's real to a lot of people. So I challenge you... do you want to make a change and help a woman or a girl get past the negativity that makes her think only straight hair is beautiful? After you read this post, find one girl and work strictly with her for one year on understanding her true beauty. (not my idea; this is derived from a prolific speaker at this year's annual MLK breakfast in NC)

For me, understanding my purpose and beauty according to God was the turning point to truly loving myself... and heavens, it's so much deeper than what we see in the mirror.
I could not have said it better myself.
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Old 07-13-2008, 10:34 PM   #48
 
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[quote=empressri;644853]
ive seen people trying to go against the grain on np saying "well i press my hair and i still haven't lost it."

well great if that happened! but errr, if you're on an ANTI-HEAT hair forum, why the hell are you announcing that? it's like you're purposely trying to stir sh*t. if you don't like something, or don't agree, then don't participate.
quote]

I pretty much agree with everything that you said except this. I feel they go beyond anti heat and Verge on scare tactics. I'm not using heat but I like to know that the option is there. And the ladies over there had me thinking that heat is absolutely damaging no ifs ands or buts, until I did my own research.
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Old 07-13-2008, 10:44 PM   #49
 
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[quote=celeste821;645005]
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Originally Posted by empressri View Post
ive seen people trying to go against the grain on np saying "well i press my hair and i still haven't lost it."

well great if that happened! but errr, if you're on an ANTI-HEAT hair forum, why the hell are you announcing that? it's like you're purposely trying to stir sh*t. if you don't like something, or don't agree, then don't participate.
quote]

I pretty much agree with everything that you said except this. I feel they go beyond anti heat and Verge on scare tactics. I'm not using heat but I like to know that the option is there. And the ladies over there had me thinking that heat is absolutely damaging no ifs ands or buts, until I did my own research.
i feel you, but i have to disagree that heat IS damaging, no if ands or butts. that's why the couple times of year i did press my hair to get it trimmed, no doubt about it i was playing roulette with my texture. i feel you on wanting to know that the option is there, but since the owner is anti that option, of course she wouldn't advocate the talk about it on her site, and i can understand why. same goes for mtg, and the cootie cream people were using on their head.

it's like cigarettes for me. i have a blog, and if i ever chose to advertise on it, i would absolutely positively refuse to have ciggs advertised on my blog because im anti-cigg.

as far as scare tactics, to me IMHO it just seems like the truth, which should be told. no need to sugarcoat it. but again, that's just my bit on it.
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Old 07-14-2008, 11:46 AM   #50
 
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Hey Ladies,
I've been lurking this site for a little while and I finally decided to hop in on a thread that I find vital to any hair forum, especially with women of color. Here's my long winded response:

Let me begin my saying I love this forum and all the creative styling methods and products you lovely ladies use. We all know by now which site the OP was referring to. I am a member of that site also. The ladies over there have guided me from "creamy fire" to "nappy". That forum and this one are night and day. They keep it real for a reason. Its not a forum to talk about having a good or bad hair day, rather an underlying message. Its more about teaching black women to appreciate what they were blessed with.

In my experience, I relaxed my hair at a young age to fit in with the other black girls in school. I remember begging my mom to let me perm my hair so it could lay straight and flat on my back like the other girls in my class. When I came to college and spoke to other women who took the same path, I realized most of the black girls actually permed there hair to fit in with the "norms" of society. They thought they were ugly and unattractive if their hair were not as straight as a caucasian woman's hair. I know there a plenty of women who still have theses thoughts and feelings but rather than expressing them and being honest with themselves they say things like "I relaxed my hair because: it was too hard to manage, wasn't versatile enough, or it was unprofessional, etc." Np forum shows and proves that all of these statements are false and that natural kinky hair is very manageable and is probably the most versatile of them all.

Some people say they go too far by censoring certain terms. I have to disagree, some young black women need to get those terms and thoughts out of their minds. We were brainwashed for years into thinking that long straight hair was pretty hair. Growing up I rarely saw a black women with natural hair on television unless she was cleaning someone's house or advertising a relaxing product. This is why that forum is so important.

I am a mentor for young black women at my university and I cant tell you how much these young women try to transform their entire appearances to become "cute or pretty". Its sad and disheartening, thats why I encourage NP to keep their movement going. And to all the sisters on this forum that have ever had a relaxer and disagree with their movement, I believe you still have some brainwashing inside of you.

O yea, I had my young girls write me a page in response to this forum and I found it funny that one of them said that women may not like the term nappy because they are afraid to admit they are nappy, and don't know nappy is beauty.

Finally, I found it amusing that as soon as a woman expresses her true feelings, she is portrayed as being "too much or over the top". Hope you enjoy.
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Old 07-14-2008, 01:14 PM   #51
 
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thank you for you post shones! i totally agree with the whole "pay it forward" mentality.
funny story (or at least funny to me): several years back before i had ever met my SO or was ever pregnant i decided to prepare a little library of sorts for any future child i might have. i made sure to get books that showed the beauty of african americans and when i found the book nappy hair i thought i had died and gone to heaven! so i have all these books so that my kid would have something to look at with people that actually looked like him/her, who had brown skin and who had nappy hair and were proud of it...
sometimes when i see those books on the bookshelf and i look at my baby girl and im like, hmm. okay. well, there goes that plan. im going to share them with her anyway, but it still cracks me up to think about.
I think it's totally fabu that you had in mind all that support for your baby! great idea... we don't have kids yet, so maybe now's the time for me to start stocking up.
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Old 07-14-2008, 04:41 PM   #52
 
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right on curlydsc
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Old 07-14-2008, 08:02 PM   #53
 
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great post curlydsc!
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Old 07-14-2008, 09:46 PM   #54
 
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Default yeah I was sort of thinking that

I don't hate the site or anything but I came across it a couple years ago and was just lurking around because I was toying with the idea of 'going natural' I got a lot of encouragement from just seeing all the nappy hair styles. Well I forgot my user name and password but since the time I first joined the sight it looks now (from what little I was able to see w/o membership) like a lot has changed like I read something about straight hair avatars being removed. I have nappy hair and I choose to wear it natural but I think everybody should have a choice about how to wear their hair-even nappy headed people-censoring and alienating some people will not remedy the deep-seeded insecurity of other nappy headed people. That being said it's a private site and thay can do what they want with it.
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Old 07-15-2008, 10:02 AM   #55
 
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Wow what a great topic.

So far I think everyone has a valid point. Depending on your hair goals certain boards or sites just might not meet your needs. I agree totally with SUBBROCK. There is so much negativity about type 4 hair and it's easy to forget to check yourself. I will be the first to admit thast I hid behind statements like "well I just prefer my hair to be like this" or I like it this way. And that might be tru for a lot of folks but for many of us we just got issues. I think that between this sight an NP (which I am still a memeber of) Jointly I've gotten my needs met. I agree with EMPRESSRI, when I want to to talk about certain things, such as loosining my texture or some other unallowed topic, I don't go to NP. At other times my issues are more dealt with here. (I tend to have a hard time in general getting responses to most of my posts, but that's another topic) I've come a long way but it trully has been a journey. Sorry for all o' yall that don't like the term nappy, But my hair trully is!!! It is so kinky that after detangling it's like I did nothing. It is very thick and shrinks back to a big chop when it dries. I still don't love it, but as someone else said (Shones I think) I love what my hair can do. I love how it feels I love my coils. I think we have have some tully beautiful hair. As a 4b I don not neccessarily have the most sort after hair type by most folks or what I mean to say it's not so easily accepted. I know many women who won't go natural cause they think their hair is just nappy: Translation: Like mine! Yeah I wish my hair would hang, I wish I could do a wash and go ans on an on, and I've tried. As SUBURBAN said it's all part of the process. I have to admit NP has begun to get on my nerves a lot. But It trully does deserve a place in the natural hair journey for a lot of women. I do wish it was a bit more supportive of everyone's path but that's why I come here. I don't want pretend that anyone's hair journey is more painful or harder but It's like hair like mine just takes folks back to slavery and Alex Haileys "Roots" My own husband is african and litterally gasped when I went natural. He hated it. Now that my hair is longer and when I do my little twistouts he likes it more. It's sad but a lot of folks have responded that way. I've been trying trying to mentor other sisters at my job, they all have that "Fear" So that's my $1.25 for the day
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Old 07-15-2008, 12:42 PM   #56
 
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Wow what a great topic.

So far I think everyone has a valid point. Depending on your hair goals certain boards or sites just might not meet your needs. I agree totally with SUBBROCK. There is so much negativity about type 4 hair and it's easy to forget to check yourself. I will be the first to admit thast I hid behind statements like "well I just prefer my hair to be like this" or I like it this way. And that might be tru for a lot of folks but for many of us we just got issues. I think that between this sight an NP (which I am still a memeber of) Jointly I've gotten my needs met. I agree with EMPRESSRI, when I want to to talk about certain things, such as loosining my texture or some other unallowed topic, I don't go to NP. At other times my issues are more dealt with here. (I tend to have a hard time in general getting responses to most of my posts, but that's another topic) I've come a long way but it trully has been a journey. Sorry for all o' yall that don't like the term nappy, But my hair trully is!!! It is so kinky that after detangling it's like I did nothing. It is very thick and shrinks back to a big chop when it dries. I still don't love it, but as someone else said (Shones I think) I love what my hair can do. I love how it feels I love my coils. I think we have have some tully beautiful hair. As a 4b I don not neccessarily have the most sort after hair type by most folks or what I mean to say it's not so easily accepted. I know many women who won't go natural cause they think their hair is just nappy: Translation: Like mine! Yeah I wish my hair would hang, I wish I could do a wash and go ans on an on, and I've tried. As SUBURBAN said it's all part of the process. I have to admit NP has begun to get on my nerves a lot. But It trully does deserve a place in the natural hair journey for a lot of women. I do wish it was a bit more supportive of everyone's path but that's why I come here. I don't want pretend that anyone's hair journey is more painful or harder but It's like hair like mine just takes folks back to slavery and Alex Haileys "Roots" My own husband is african and litterally gasped when I went natural. He hated it. Now that my hair is longer and when I do my little twistouts he likes it more. It's sad but a lot of folks have responded that way. I've been trying trying to mentor other sisters at my job, they all have that "Fear" So that's my $1.25 for the day
nice post naiha1!! now im just curious, why do you say np gets on your nerves? i read that some ladies said they felt shunned because they had a looser texture and that it seems the tighter, kinkier textures are more welcome on np. do you feel a bit upset because you want your hair to do other things and when you bring it up on np, you're told that you should embrace what you have instead of trying to change it?

or something like that lol just want to understand more
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Old 07-15-2008, 05:39 PM   #57
 
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Hey Empress,

Maybe getting on my nerves was a little exagerated. I definatly feel very accepted for my texture on NP. It was one of the first sites I found when I went natural. But as a new natural on the frustrating journey of acceptance of my kinks I found NP restrictive or shall I say not as supportive of the many "falls you may take in accepting your hair. Seeing things like "I don't think we're allowed to talk about that" bother me a bit, it just don't sit right ya know? Butthis has only been recently. Again I really do understand some of the restrictions and militantness? As I said in my earlier post this aint always the most sough after and accepted texture. I was a permin' fool. My hair was always did and I was a ballerina in my former life so the hair had to be long enough to put into a bun. I knew so little when I did the big chop. I tried every suggstion product an technique for a good year or more, then got frustrated and relaxed again. HATED IT barely lasted a month, cut ial off again and started over. This time with a better understanding of my hair and what it does. Np has definately taught me to appreciate and work with what I got and stop tryin to achieve some curl or texture that i just don't posess But sometimes I wish this joint would hang a little dammit. But like you said when I want to talk about the tabu stuff I come here!
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Old 07-16-2008, 03:50 AM   #58
 
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Ri, I've been on NP almost as long as you have and there are some folks who see "curl definition" and they are all over beating down the OP rather than reading what the person says and possibly guiding them to another site. What's wrong with that? Whether here or NP, if someone starts a topic that's not typically discussed on this forum or NP, I point them in the direction of what they are looking for. You can't force a person to accept the nappy, not everyone is ready for that. NP can be a bit abrasive to those that step outside of the mission statement.

I do agree, however, that there is definitely a need for a site like NP, particularly if your hair is not 3c curly or 4a silky.

ETA: piggybacking off of something suburban mentioned...It is odd that on NP, it is not people like sonce (who has 4a/4b super kinky long hair) or I think her name is yaya (very long 4b-ish hair) and others like that aren't the names that everyone's always bringing up...it's empressri (3b/3c), zharia (I think that's her name, also 3c/4a gorgeous too) and others with hair types that are not the types of hair referred to in the mission statement. The reason you may not see the curly hate is because your head of hair is one of the most praised on NP.

This is not an attack, so, please don't see it that way. I'm keeping it real here. Much love empressri!
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Old 07-16-2008, 05:51 AM   #59
 
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Posts: 115
Default i support individuality...

good morning ladies:

i was just about to try and go back to bed when i came across this thread and felt the need to comment. i appreciate all you ladies so much because i've learned through your experience. and i just want to say thank you for sharing. so on to the topic at hand. my major problem, with society, is:

WHY CAN'T WE CELEBRATE INDIVIDUALITY?
seriously. why does it have to be one way or the other? when i went natural i thought it was about being an individual, but i've come to learn there is a lot of discrimination directed right back to people who wear straight hair.

unlike india arie, i am my hair. if i wasn't then i wouldn't spend all my extra pennies and join web sites just to talk about my hair. it expresses who i am. so when i see a fellow lady who wears her hair straight it doesn't bother me because its her decision and thats how she chooses to express herself.

now there are a couple of things said that i would like to defend because i was raised in the hair industry. to say that the creators of these product lines don't care about damaging women's scalps is false. if they didn't care then they couldn't make a profit. the hair industry is based solely on results. now the major problem is that there are a lot of bad hair dressers and clients who abuse the product(s). do you know that relaxers were never meant to straighten the hair 100%? relaxers were meant to relax the hair strand about 80%, but of course people abused the product to get their hair as straight as possible. there are so many hair relaxer brands because the demand is high. and the reason why they're not black owned is because the majority of black owned companies decide to sell their company.

the majority of my mother's clients have relaxers. for me to pull these ladies aside and tell them its obvious that they don't love themselves because they are applying "creamy crack" to their head is just crazy. and if you use chemicals the PROPER way your hair won't end up damaged. as i said in another thread all my friends have relaxers and healthy hair in the middle of their backs. and so what if they do? seriously? what is the big dang gone deal if a woman chooses to wear a certain style and uses certain products to achieve that style. look at rihanna... that girl's whole style is F-I-Y-A-H! and you know what it works for her.

now i absolutely agree that there is a strong mental disillusion that long, straight hair is better. but i don't think its like it was 30 years ago. a lot of the compliments i get on my hair come from caucasian women. but what i think people see the most is me owning my individuality.

i don't care how you wear your hair, but i do care about your mentality. my problem with young girls is that they aren't growing up to be individuals. all they do is what MTV and BET tell them to do. its INSANE! and i 100% agree with shones. we have to get out there and help save the generation behind us. the women's ministry at my old church would constantly remind us: "if everyone disciples one, then everyone will be discipled!"
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Old 07-16-2008, 09:49 AM   #60
 
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 4,808
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Quote:
Originally Posted by keepitmovin View Post
Ri, I've been on NP almost as long as you have and there are some folks who see "curl definition" and they are all over beating down the OP rather than reading what the person says and possibly guiding them to another site. What's wrong with that? Whether here or NP, if someone starts a topic that's not typically discussed on this forum or NP, I point them in the direction of what they are looking for. You can't force a person to accept the nappy, not everyone is ready for that. NP can be a bit abrasive to those that step outside of the mission statement.

I do agree, however, that there is definitely a need for a site like NP, particularly if your hair is not 3c curly or 4a silky.

ETA: piggybacking off of something suburban mentioned...It is odd that on NP, it is not people like sonce (who has 4a/4b super kinky long hair) or I think her name is yaya (very long 4b-ish hair) and others like that aren't the names that everyone's always bringing up...it's empressri (3b/3c), zharia (I think that's her name, also 3c/4a gorgeous too) and others with hair types that are not the types of hair referred to in the mission statement. The reason you may not see the curly hate is because your head of hair is one of the most praised on NP.

This is not an attack, so, please don't see it that way. I'm keeping it real here. Much love empressri!
hehe girl you know i never see you attacking me!! muah!

no, i agree with you on the curl definition thing. but the two sides of that is, some people (like me) DO have curl definition, it's just that my hair is frizzy as all hell but you can see the curls in between the frizz, and of course you may want to define them.

but they get all up in arms because, well, everyone doesn't have curl definition, or i should say the type of curl definition they are seeking, and they think by using XYZ product that it will give them curls. but, if ive given advice on that topic i always suggest a product. i mean hell, i can suggest something to hold the frizz at bay or a method to keep your hair stretched from being all tangled, why not share on how to define curls?

see, i feel just the opposite where you mention with the hair types. there was a time i felt i got no love and everyone was more looking at the tighter kinky haired sisters lol but then i chalked it up to, well maybe they think we can't share hair advice because are textures are different.

although i know that is totally untrue, because ive shared many a hair tips with looser or tighter curled sisters, and they've given me advice.

and i have such a weird texture of hair, i mean don't get me wrong i love it, but sometimes i didnt know where the hell i fit in at, cause i thought it wasn't curly enough to be called curly, too tight to be wavy, and not kinky enough to be kinky...so what the hell kind of hair do i have!! lol


oh, and naiha1, gotchu sis

but i love this site and that one for different reasons, just like i love my entire product stash for different reasons. i love variety!
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