To my ex-husband: You were my first boyfriend when I was 15 years old and you wasted 17 years of my life with your cheating. I loved you so much I was blind to it. I stayed home and raised our daughters, picked up your dirty underwear off the floor and brought you dinner in your recliner every day. While you screwed everyone I knew. You're 40 years old; stop sleeping with girls your daughter's age. You're not cute; they're letting you pay their bills until they find something better. Don't give me that pitiful look around the holidays or tell me you miss me. You made your own bed.
To my ex-boyfriend: I can't even express how much I loved you and you wasted 3 years of my life. You could never understand that I wanted you and not your money. I used to wish all the time that you were broke. And here's a newsflash: Those boys of yours that can do no wrong in your eyes, they're weak and spineless and you made them that way. Yes, you're a self-made man. Yes, you went through a lot to be as successful as you are. But your sons didn't. And giving them everything they want and making life easy for them is crippling them. They appreciate nothing. You gave up our relationship so you could make them your priority. They're in their 20s. They don't want you; just your money. Where did you spend the holidays? Alone again? I bet they didn't even call.
Both of you: See that hot 29 year old guy with the gorgeous body who's a great daddy to our baby? He replaced you. Thanks for screwing me over.
Yes, I have a baby, a freshman in high school and a freshman in college and I'm 37. I don't want to hear you say you're glad to be a "young mom." You don't work, you live off the government and you're a terrible role model. Know why my girls are so successful? They watched me work and sacrifice. Know why your kids will make you a grandma before you're 30 and follow in your welfare footsteps? Guess.
P.S. How come we have to pay for your kids' food but you always have the money to get your nails done?
Did you do it for love? Did you do it for money? Did you do it for spite? Did you think you had to, honey?