are you doing CG at all? quit the shampoo. i use suave naturals for co wash and garnier fructis regular co for leavein. robert craig has great hair dye that is non toxic but it only deposits color, so if you are lightening it will not work. you can get it at www.robertcraig.com
the rest are cheap at supermarket. post pictures and describe your present hair routine so we can help more. i get a hair cut every 10-12 months and my hair is better than ever with the cg routine-i've got a few years on you too...
Susan suburban NY
3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
CG since 11/11/04
HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls