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frankie88 11-13-2013 10:04 AM

Having a hard time gaining weight
 
Hello, so this is kind of an awkward thing for me to bring up. I have always been thin all my life. I am more confident with my body, but when I was younger I was very self conscious about my weight. In high school I was bullied a lot because everyone thought I was anorexic since I barely weighed 90 pounds. Now that I am older, I feel comfortable in my skin, but I don't know if I am healthy being so thin. My BMI is in the underweight zone. I currently struggle to stay at 115, but according to BMI chart my healthy weight should be 127-141 for my height. I have been trying to increase fats, carbs and proteins in my diet, but I only want to do it in a healthy way. I also am trying to eat bigger portions more frequently throughout the day. Which is hard for me because I hate that "stuffed" feeling in my stomach. Does anyone have any tips for healthy weight gain? It's much appreciated.

sixelamy 11-13-2013 11:27 AM

I've had this problem quite a few times throughout my life. Mine were caused by some medical conditions though, so I would recommend going to your doctor if you haven't already.

Two problems for me personally were hormonal imbalance and digestive disorder. No matter how much I ate (and I ate a LOT!) I couldn't gain weight for the life of me. I finally did when I got back on the pill and cut out some foods (gluten, mainly).

I remember one day at work a few years ago - I would eat avocados everyday to get my calories up. Well, they are messy so I had to wash my hands after I ate everyday. Someone came up to me one day and said someone had expressed their concern to them that I might be bulimic. I was like.. I'm bulimic because I have good hygiene??? Are you kidding me? You just have to laugh it off..

frankie88 11-13-2013 12:08 PM

I have not seen a doctor about my weight. However, I suspect it may be from a hormone imbalance too. I have always had many hormone related issues since I hit puberty. My main problem was severe hormonal acne, I went on the ring for it, and it does seem to help. However, my doctor thinks I need to switch to the pill instead because the ring is too low dose. I am going to switch and see if the pill helps me with the issues I have.

I also have been (mostly) gluten free for several months. It was mostly just as an experiment to see if gluten was a culprit in my acne problem. I haven't come to a conclusion yet, but I feel better staying away from it as much as possible.

Anyways, I am really excited to try going on the pill to see if it makes a difference. If not, then I will see a doctor about it in case it might be something else.

pprMACHEheart 11-15-2013 05:58 AM

I just saw my doctor for low BMI yesterday. I've got blood work to do today. I've had the same struggle my whole life. I barely weighed 90 lbs in high school and was often called anorexic. I fluctuate in weight from 112-121, it's never consistent month to month. Sometimes I gain and sometimes I don't.

I hope you're able to put on weight in a healthy manner. I know the difficulty; trust me I do.

sixelamy 11-15-2013 07:29 AM

I hope you both can get to where you want to be. It was annoying when everyone was telling me, "I wish I had your problem." And I'm just like, "No, trust me, you don't." I think it's much harder to try and gain weight than it is to try and lose it. It's a difficult situation to be in, for sure.

pprMACHEheart 11-15-2013 08:54 AM

Thanks sixelamy.

frankie88 11-15-2013 10:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sixelamy (Post 2223953)
I hope you both can get to where you want to be. It was annoying when everyone was telling me, "I wish I had your problem." And I'm just like, "No, trust me, you don't." I think it's much harder to try and gain weight than it is to try and lose it. It's a difficult situation to be in, for sure.

I agree!! And I hate it when people tell me that I look like a "stick" or a "twig". I think it's very rude...It's just as hurtful as calling someone fat.

I wish society could just accept the fact that everybody has a unique body and there is no "perfect" body type. For example, by ex boyfriend used to complain that I didn't have enough curves and he preferred curvier body types. It drove me nuts because I used to try so hard to gain weight so I could feel more accepted by him but I would always get frustrated with myself since I couldn't gain anything. I used to feel like I was inferior since I didn't have a perfect body with big boobs and a big butt.

I realized that if he can't like my outside, he probably won't like whats on the inside so I moved on.... and for other reasons as well.

But sometimes I wish people could just be more accepting in our differences. Like I have a friend who isn't overweight by any means, but she makes snarky comments regarding my weight. She says things like I need to eat more or that I am too skinny. She makes assumptions about me, like I am scared to get fat. I just brush it off, but it gets annoying. It's not her place to make those kinds of judgments.

I do know that I need to gain a few pounds for my health. I know gaining weight won't stop people's criticism or judgement. So that is why I am doing it only for me and my health.

sixelamy 11-15-2013 10:45 AM

It is very infuriating when people are like that!! A lot of times, I think it's a bit of jealousy, and the other times it's a lot of ignorance. It's true that saying - Don't judge a man/woman until you walk a mile in their shoes.

I used to get a lot of grief from my dad. He always called me too skinny, unhealthy, just eat whatever you want. It really hurt me deeply. People can be so cruel.

pprMACHEheart 11-15-2013 11:20 AM

I had an ex boyfriend who was the opposite. I managed somehow to gain some weight and be at 137 lbs and I was most comfortable at that weight. Then he started saying I was too curvy, that he didn't like girls with big butts and boobs, he wanted me petite. So like an idiot, I lost the weight and to this day I cannot gain it back. I regret feeling pressured to please someone else, even if I did love him, I sacrificed feeling comfortable in my own skin because he said I weighed too much for him. It wasn't my fault he only weighed 145 lbs.

frankie88 11-15-2013 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pprMACHEheart (Post 2224006)
I had an ex boyfriend who was the opposite. I managed somehow to gain some weight and be at 137 lbs and I was most comfortable at that weight. Then he started saying I was too curvy, that he didn't like girls with big butts and boobs, he wanted me petite. So like an idiot, I lost the weight and to this day I cannot gain it back. I regret feeling pressured to please someone else, even if I did love him, I sacrificed feeling comfortable in my own skin because he said I weighed too much for him. It wasn't my fault he only weighed 145 lbs.

I've learned that you can't please everyone. And when it comes to someone like a boyfriend, I feel like they can GTFO if they have an issue with something like my body. If they want to be my boyfriend, they are going to have to accept me for who I am instead of trying to change me into what THEY want. That is just how I feel about it.

pprMACHEheart 11-15-2013 03:26 PM

You make all the sense in the world. I agree with you, I was young . . 21 and he was 28 . . Idk, I shouldn't have been involved with someone that old anyway.

SmilingElephant 11-15-2013 03:40 PM

I struggle with this too. I believe my issue is genetic bc my dad has ALWAYS been skinny for as long is i have known my dad.

Ive tried EVERYTHING to gain weight. The only time i packed on pounds is when i was put on medication for another reason...i went from 125 to 162! I'm 5'8 so for me 145-150 i start looking chunky. Lol! But i absolutely loved being that size! I had curves galore! Then i stopped taking the meds and went allllll the way back down to 125. My mom accused me of doing drugs :(

Im just now back on the medication plus ive also just recently been diagnosed with hypothyroidism. So im also taking medication for that...its weird bc hypothyroidism is known to cause weight GAIN so....idk...we'll see lol

But i absolutely HATE when somebody feels the need to tell me how skinny i am or that they hate me bc im skinny. It really does hurt my feelings and ppl think its funny that i get upset.

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pprMACHEheart 11-15-2013 03:54 PM

I hate that too. When some says "Omg, you're so skinny!" Um, yes, I know . . I own a mirror and I live in this body everyday.

sixelamy 11-15-2013 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pprMACHEheart (Post 2224006)
I had an ex boyfriend who was the opposite. I managed somehow to gain some weight and be at 137 lbs and I was most comfortable at that weight. Then he started saying I was too curvy, that he didn't like girls with big butts and boobs, he wanted me petite. So like an idiot, I lost the weight and to this day I cannot gain it back. I regret feeling pressured to please someone else, even if I did love him, I sacrificed feeling comfortable in my own skin because he said I weighed too much for him. It wasn't my fault he only weighed 145 lbs.

I know this well! I had a boyfriend very briefly who had an issue with my weight. Since I got back on the pill, I've done nothing but gain weight (I'm currently about 20lbs over where I should be). I'm finally starting to lose it with a diet for some other issues I'm having. Anyhow... he claimed I was "the one" after A MONTH! But he didn't like the way I looked, he said a girl "couldn't to be too skinny". I highly disagree. And knowing where I came from and that I was looking healthy at the time I was dating this chump, I was just like... you know what... this isn't going to work. I had to wear my hair straight for him, always had to wear makeup, he pushed me to work out (I was doing fine by myself, thanks), and I couldn't wear yoga pants in public. He complained all the time that his dad was controlling with his mom, and I told him you're exactly like your dad!! If anybody is going to dictate my life, it surely isn't you, mister!! I couldn't believe this guy!!

After that I got back with my current bf who loved me really underweight and loves me a little overweight. Makes me love him just that much more! Shallow people are so irritating.

pprMACHEheart 11-16-2013 03:21 AM

Yeah I don't know where some of these guys have the audacity, honestly. I'm currently "working" on getting back with my most current ex and he loves me skinny like I am and he loved me when I weighed a few lbs more. His constant encouragement really shows me that I was in a wrong situation before him. I love him for that.

noritaarf 11-16-2013 05:02 AM

I suggest you find a 'Functional Medicine' doctor. they are regular doctors, MDs or DOs, but think outside of the box. I think you should also have a full thyroid panel done, w/ TSH, T3 and T4. You can actually have the lab work done on your own at Thyroid Testing | PersonaLabs.com google for a coupon code, there is usually a 20% code at retailmenot.com so for about $40 you will know if you have an over active thyroid. If everything is "normal" and you still feel it's not right, make your doctor listen or find a new doc.

frankie88 11-26-2013 09:23 AM

So since changing my diet a bit, I am excited to say I have gained 2 pounds! It doesn't sound like a lot, but my ribs aren't showing anymore and I feel great! :)


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