Hair regimen for moisture and bounce for type 3 hair??!!

I big chopped about 2 and a half weeks ago and my hair is about medium length (touches my shoulders when I pull it) and I've been trying to experiment with new styles but I can't find a way to wear my hair down and define my curls. I really want my curls to be soft and bouncy but they usually just end up in a frizzy afro mess..
I deep condition at least once a week and when I do I first co-wash with Wen cleansing conditioner, condition with some kind of cheap conditioner (suave, VO5, ect.), apply the deep conditioner from roots to tips, put my hair in a plastic cap, leave it for 30 minutes or so, and rinse with cool water. Then I apply some leave in my grandma buys (currently it's Luster's Pink Lotion), detangle with a wide tooth comb, and seal with coconut and olive oil and then my hair ends up like this.......no bounce, no defined curls, even with the deep conditioning and oils my hair isn't even soft!!
What am I doing wrong? How do you guys get soft bouncy curls? Are there any products or techniques you can reccomend that would give me that bounce and moisture for my curls?
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this.
Any information or tips are greatly appreciated!

Thanks!
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I've got 2B/3B curls that do what they want whenever they want, I rarely wear it down just cause I don't feel like having it in my face all day but I do this "thing" everyday that makes my curls in a pony tail bounce and shine and I can wear my hair down if I want to. Because I have such unruly hair I've done a lot of research about curly hair, I know more than my curly haired hair dresser lol. Anyways with ur course hair ur doing the rite thing with the deep conditioning u should avoid things like sulfates in shampoos and such, also you rarely need to shampoo ur hair, I only shampoo my roots cause they can get kind of oily. So when I'm in the shower I mix in a bottle a little conditioner, a little gel, and a little water. Personally I hate the crunchy feeling gel gives but I love the hold, so diluting the gel gives it hold without the crunch, so wash ur hair like you normally would smother ur hair from tip to root with the mixture and comb it through ur hair, then wash it it upside down with COLD water the colder the better, then instead of ringing ur hair out take parts and squish it up to ur head and squeez out the water while ur upside down, then dry with a cotton tshirt or microfiber towel after ur hair drys a little, do this while it's damp, flip your hair over and apply a Creme of some sort, I use Shea moisture curling milk and then I add kinky curly curling custard and then you let it air dry and u should have bouncy defined curls
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,073
I big chopped about 2 and a half weeks ago and my hair is about medium length (touches my shoulders when I pull it) and I've been trying to experiment with new styles but I can't find a way to wear my hair down and define my curls. I really want my curls to be soft and bouncy but they usually just end up in a frizzy afro mess..
I deep condition at least once a week and when I do I first co-wash with Wen cleansing conditioner, condition with some kind of cheap conditioner (suave, VO5, ect.), apply the deep conditioner from roots to tips, put my hair in a plastic cap, leave it for 30 minutes or so, and rinse with cool water. Then I apply some leave in my grandma buys (currently it's Luster's Pink Lotion), detangle with a wide tooth comb, and seal with coconut and olive oil and then my hair ends up like this.......no bounce, no defined curls, even with the deep conditioning and oils my hair isn't even soft!!
What am I doing wrong? How do you guys get soft bouncy curls? Are there any products or techniques you can reccomend that would give me that bounce and moisture for my curls?
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this.
Any information or tips are greatly appreciated!

Thanks!
Originally Posted by shyshy0599

I'm not a teenager like you but I think I can help. You're going to have to change how you've been doing things, especially how you do the DT, you're using too many similar things and overwhelming your hair with all that stuff and all the manipulation that goes with it. I think you're also doing things a little backwards, like using Wen that's more expensive and rich to co-wash and the cheap one after.

But that's not so bad, what you need to do is detangle your hair while you have the Wen or whatever you choose for co-washing on your hair. AND you don't need a 2nd conditioner if you're going to do a DT
because they are designed to help close up the cuticle, so it gets harder for the DT to penetrate, maybe that's what's happening. On the other hand, you could be seriously over-conditioning your hair too. Yes, that happens and it often produces opposite results than what we're looking for.

Your hair should remain tangle-free after co-washing and since it apparently doesn't I'm thinking you're using the wrong things. You didn't mention what you use to DT so that's probably the problem. My recommendation would be to use one that already has detanglers (i.e., cetrimonium or behentrimonium chloride) and moisturizers (i.e., panthenol, honey, sorbitol) and emollients (oils, butters, etc.) in it so you don't have to take so many steps.

Luster's Pink is a so-called "oil moisturizer" that I'm sure contains mineral oil and it can act as a barrier to moisture so instead of moisturizing it can actually cause dryness. Some people here use it to seal but I don't think they're co-washing, when you co-wash you cannot use things that build up on your hair, so stop using that. Besides, if the DT already contains the right things there's no need for a LI of any kind, leave that for the times when you're just doing a "wash and go".

I saw no reason whatsoever to use both OO and c.o. after the above, too many oils and anyone can end up with an undefined frizzy mess. So there you have it... More is definitely NOT better, as the saying goes sometimes "less is more".

So, here's the new way to try: 1) co-wash with the CO that gives you the most slip and detangle your hair really well; 2) barely blot the excess water without rubbing your hair at all, preferably using a microfiber towel (small ones sold at the Dollar Tree) or an old T-shirt; 3) use a little of Wen as a LI, raking it through with your fingers by sections; 4) seal with just a little c.o. , some people add a hair creme or butter too, this is called the LOC method (L=LI, O=oil, C=cream). 5) You may want to use the "head shake" method (fast from side to side) to help your curls get some definition. This routine alone should be enough to moisturize your hair without needing to DT every single week, once or 2x/month should be enough for someone who just did a big chop and now should have completely healthy hair.

I suggest that you go to YouTube and look up tutorial videos for curly hair and choose a few of people with hair similar to yours to see what technique they use for defining their curls as there are several and you may like some other one better.
Thanks so much for all your help, and I think you're right, ever since I've been natural I've been going a little overboard with the moisture and maybe that's why my hair is so....blah haha. I'll try out your tips and stop overwhelming myself with so many moisturizing products.
Thanks again!
I big chopped about 2 and a half weeks ago and my hair is about medium length (touches my shoulders when I pull it) and I've been trying to experiment with new styles but I can't find a way to wear my hair down and define my curls. I really want my curls to be soft and bouncy but they usually just end up in a frizzy afro mess..
I deep condition at least once a week and when I do I first co-wash with Wen cleansing conditioner, condition with some kind of cheap conditioner (suave, VO5, ect.), apply the deep conditioner from roots to tips, put my hair in a plastic cap, leave it for 30 minutes or so, and rinse with cool water. Then I apply some leave in my grandma buys (currently it's Luster's Pink Lotion), detangle with a wide tooth comb, and seal with coconut and olive oil and then my hair ends up like this.......no bounce, no defined curls, even with the deep conditioning and oils my hair isn't even soft!!
What am I doing wrong? How do you guys get soft bouncy curls? Are there any products or techniques you can reccomend that would give me that bounce and moisture for my curls?
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this.
Any information or tips are greatly appreciated!

Thanks!
Originally Posted by shyshy0599

I'm not a teenager like you but I think I can help. You're going to have to change how you've been doing things, especially how you do the DT, you're using too many similar things and overwhelming your hair with all that stuff and all the manipulation that goes with it. I think you're also doing things a little backwards, like using Wen that's more expensive and rich to co-wash and the cheap one after.

But that's not so bad, what you need to do is detangle your hair while you have the Wen or whatever you choose for co-washing on your hair. AND you don't need a 2nd conditioner if you're going to do a DT
because they are designed to help close up the cuticle, so it gets harder for the DT to penetrate, maybe that's what's happening. On the other hand, you could be seriously over-conditioning your hair too. Yes, that happens and it often produces opposite results than what we're looking for.

Your hair should remain tangle-free after co-washing and since it apparently doesn't I'm thinking you're using the wrong things. You didn't mention what you use to DT so that's probably the problem. My recommendation would be to use one that already has detanglers (i.e., cetrimonium or behentrimonium chloride) and moisturizers (i.e., panthenol, honey, sorbitol) and emollients (oils, butters, etc.) in it so you don't have to take so many steps.

Luster's Pink is a so-called "oil moisturizer" that I'm sure contains mineral oil and it can act as a barrier to moisture so instead of moisturizing it can actually cause dryness. Some people here use it to seal but I don't think they're co-washing, when you co-wash you cannot use things that build up on your hair, so stop using that. Besides, if the DT already contains the right things there's no need for a LI of any kind, leave that for the times when you're just doing a "wash and go".

I saw no reason whatsoever to use both OO and c.o. after the above, too many oils and anyone can end up with an undefined frizzy mess. So there you have it... More is definitely NOT better, as the saying goes sometimes "less is more".

So, here's the new way to try: 1) co-wash with the CO that gives you the most slip and detangle your hair really well; 2) barely blot the excess water without rubbing your hair at all, preferably using a microfiber towel (small ones sold at the Dollar Tree) or an old T-shirt; 3) use a little of Wen as a LI, raking it through with your fingers by sections; 4) seal with just a little c.o. , some people add a hair creme or butter too, this is called the LOC method (L=LI, O=oil, C=cream). 5) You may want to use the "head shake" method (fast from side to side) to help your curls get some definition. This routine alone should be enough to moisturize your hair without needing to DT every single week, once or 2x/month should be enough for someone who just did a big chop and now should have completely healthy hair.

I suggest that you go to YouTube and look up tutorial videos for curly hair and choose a few of people with hair similar to yours to see what technique they use for defining their curls as there are several and you may like some other one better.
Originally Posted by CGSince2002
Thanks so much for all your help and tips. I think you're right, ever since I've been natural, I've been going a little overboard with the moisture. I'm going to try the tips you suggested and see where it takes me.
Thanks again!
I've got 2B/3B curls that do what they want whenever they want, I rarely wear it down just cause I don't feel like having it in my face all day but I do this "thing" everyday that makes my curls in a pony tail bounce and shine and I can wear my hair down if I want to. Because I have such unruly hair I've done a lot of research about curly hair, I know more than my curly haired hair dresser lol. Anyways with ur course hair ur doing the rite thing with the deep conditioning u should avoid things like sulfates in shampoos and such, also you rarely need to shampoo ur hair, I only shampoo my roots cause they can get kind of oily. So when I'm in the shower I mix in a bottle a little conditioner, a little gel, and a little water. Personally I hate the crunchy feeling gel gives but I love the hold, so diluting the gel gives it hold without the crunch, so wash ur hair like you normally would smother ur hair from tip to root with the mixture and comb it through ur hair, then wash it it upside down with COLD water the colder the better, then instead of ringing ur hair out take parts and squish it up to ur head and squeez out the water while ur upside down, then dry with a cotton tshirt or microfiber towel after ur hair drys a little, do this while it's damp, flip your hair over and apply a Creme of some sort, I use Shea moisture curling milk and then I add kinky curly curling custard and then you let it air dry and u should have bouncy defined curls
Originally Posted by Caiyarain
I hate gels too. I'm going to try that diluting trick. Thanks!
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,073
I've got 2B/3B curls that do what they want whenever they want, I rarely wear it down just cause I don't feel like having it in my face all day but I do this "thing" everyday that makes my curls in a pony tail bounce and shine and I can wear my hair down if I want to. Because I have such unruly hair I've done a lot of research about curly hair, I know more than my curly haired hair dresser lol. Anyways with ur course hair ur doing the rite thing with the deep conditioning u should avoid things like sulfates in shampoos and such, also you rarely need to shampoo ur hair, I only shampoo my roots cause they can get kind of oily. So when I'm in the shower I mix in a bottle a little conditioner, a little gel, and a little water. Personally I hate the crunchy feeling gel gives but I love the hold, so diluting the gel gives it hold without the crunch, so wash ur hair like you normally would smother ur hair from tip to root with the mixture and comb it through ur hair, then wash it it upside down with COLD water the colder the better, then instead of ringing ur hair out take parts and squish it up to ur head and squeez out the water while ur upside down, then dry with a cotton tshirt or microfiber towel after ur hair drys a little, do this while it's damp, flip your hair over and apply a Creme of some sort, I use Shea moisture curling milk and then I add kinky curly curling custard and then you let it air dry and u should have bouncy defined curls
Originally Posted by Caiyarain
I hate gels too. I'm going to try that diluting trick. Thanks!
Originally Posted by shyshy0599
Caiyarain... I just re-read what you wrote and it left me a bit confused... You're mixing gel with your CO for washing? If that is so I have to regretfully say that's not a good idea.

A gel is a styler and should be applied last, mixing it with the CO for co-washing is going to interfere with the cleansing and waste most of the gel in the process. I'm wondering how long you've been doing this... maybe you think it's working so far for you (but you're using several things too...) but unless you're using a natural gel like FSG or okra, you may end up with a lot of buildup. A better idea IMO is to mix the gel with a little CO and apply it last, then seal with a bit of oil.

But gel is not even necessary to a lot of people, I myself skip it a lot of times. Besides, there's gels with different types of hold, and if one already owns a strong gel, all you have to do is dilute a portion of it with water before applying, or apply it on very wet hair, that way when you squeeze some of the water out the excess goes away.

Or like I said before, you can mix it with CO (first testing a tiny amount to see if they are compatible) to create your own "curl cream" or with an oil to make your own "custard". Here's one of the best recipes I've seen (it's given at the end, starting at 3:45): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zELEoTRcMtg
There are many others but most use a lot of oil, so that would depend on each person's needs.
You're hair is blah because you are suffocating with too many things. Lusters pink lotion is the greasiest thing on the market and if you're gunna use it, make that the ONLY thing you use on your hair to style. Lusters has oil already so that coconut oil and the other product you mentioned isn't necessary.

It's better to shampoo as needed, cowash the rest of the time. After cowashing and getting out of the shower use a little leave in OR a curling cream OR mix leave in and gel (tiny bit). The less product the more bounce. Diffusing helps with bounce and curl as well
i recommend ogx moisturizing macadamia oil conditioner, you can get it for $5.74 at walmart and Safeway
my hair type is 3b-3c and this works great i get my hair wet in the shower and do a thick coat of it all over my head, then i leave this on my hair while i shave, comb my hair out with a pick,(comb with the conditioner on for MUCH less frizz) then i rinse my hair out and scrunch Jessi curl rocken ringlets, and jessi curl confident coils ( you can find it here: https://www.jessicurl.com/ ) into my dripping wet hair. the jessi curl products are a bit expensive ( around $17.00 a bottle) but it is sooo worth it, and a bottle lasts me around a year and a half.
My observation with my curly hair is that my hair needs products that hydrate my hair more than moisture. I use tresemme naturals conditioner or as I am cowash. Both hydrate my hair very well. Once my hair is hydrated, I have beautiful curls after styling. I also detangle with loads of conditioner in my hair. I twist the front my hair after detangling because that's the hardest part of my head to style. Once I take down the twists and add my leave in conditioner and gel, I shake my head around. I'm left with frizz free defined curls.

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