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Old 03-22-2013, 03:24 PM   #1
 
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Default Really mods, you locked the "First time" thread?

Why is that not appropriate for NC, but a thread of a few days ago about libido OK? And a marriage thread that was just as (non) explicit was fine too?

How do you determine what is and is not OK?
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Old 03-22-2013, 03:36 PM   #2
 
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you have to pm them about issues or they will delete this.
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Old 03-22-2013, 03:54 PM   #3
 
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Feedback can go here. I am also curious about what is okay and not okay. There have been some racy threads on this board but this is not one of them. I think we need explicit (pardon the pun) guidelines about what topics are acceptable.
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Old 03-22-2013, 04:05 PM   #4
 
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I think because the thread said something about giving advice to young girls was where the line was drawn?

I don't know, that's the only thing I could see as being semi inappropriate.
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Old 03-22-2013, 04:16 PM   #5
 
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It's ok to talk about what kind of pooper you are but not ok to discuss first time you had sex? What's the different as far as topic appropriateness besides a hole? (*)(!)
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Old 03-22-2013, 04:21 PM   #6
 
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Old 03-22-2013, 04:39 PM   #7
 
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This is really getting ridiculous, it seems that only the most mundane topics are ok here these days.
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Old 03-22-2013, 05:08 PM   #8
 
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I am disgusted to see that thread locked. I remember a very similar thread a few years back about whether your first time hurt, and I found it very reassuring to read such an open discussion on the topic. It showed me a far more healthy attitude toward sex than the one I was presented IRL. I still haven't had my first time but threads like that one and others have been instrumental in teaching me stuff like how to discuss things openly with your partner and know when you're really ready, not to mention making details like how and why it sometimes hurts less taboo and thus less mysterious and scary.

That thread was clearly marked "adult," so properly supervised 12-year-olds would not end up in there anyway, and honestly, teens aren't even a large enough portion of Non-Hair to act like this board is frequented by children. Locking that thread says, "Sex is so dirty the very subject is tainted. Good girls don't ask questions or speak up about their fears. If you want to hear something more comforting than 'IT WILL HURT LIKE HELLFIRE AND YOU'LL GET AIDS AND DIE' then find it somewhere else." NC.com used to be a place where such disturbing messages weren't the only ones being sent. Not anymore, I guess.
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Old 03-22-2013, 05:23 PM   #9
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i just farted. in disgust.
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Old 03-22-2013, 05:30 PM   #10
 
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I find myself annoyed it was closed as well.

It's nothing compared to threads we've had in the past.

But mostly because I see nothing wrong or remotely offensive about women in a forum talking/sharing about their first time having sex.

A lot of the posters here have been posting a long time and have always been open and friendly and full of advice for anyone, old or new, who had questions about sex, periods, relationships, health etc. I've learnt a lot over the years and it has been great to know you could ask the women here questions you wouldn't always feel comfortable asking someone face to face IRL and you'd receive an honest and open answer.

It's a shame that, apparently, is no longer the case. I don't understand the 'this is not the place for this' comment by the mod and would like to know what the problem was.
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Old 03-22-2013, 05:31 PM   #11
 
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great post, sas!



did someone see CurlyEyes' post about being 12 when she joined here and have a freak-out?
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Old 03-22-2013, 05:38 PM   #12
 
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I know this was definitely discussed before here. I've definitely shared my first time experience at least once.
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Old 03-22-2013, 05:46 PM   #13
 
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I was also very surprised and disappointed that the thread was locked. I'm perplexed. I don't agree with this decision at all. I feel like we are being muzzled unnecessarily. This is such an inflammatory topic, really, really? SMH.
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Old 03-22-2013, 05:55 PM   #14
 
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Ok I just saw the response and I'm really annoyed. We used to talk about sex here all the time. And since women are so different it's nice to get a variety of viewpoints and facts here as opposed to just asking my few of my female friends that are probably like me anyways. I remember even starting a thread on doggy style here and got tips on different positions/angles/timing which was very helpful.
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Old 03-22-2013, 06:09 PM   #15
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Josephine View Post
I know this was definitely discussed before here. I've definitely shared my first time experience at least once.
Yeah, I brought up my first time in Say It I Dare You 2 or 3 days ago. I would have discussed it again. It doesn't bother me to talk about it and I can remember finding it reassuring, and sometimes not so much, when I heard other women discussing it.

It would be rare to find a girl/young woman that was not curious about first time experiences.
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Old 03-22-2013, 06:26 PM   #16
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rouquinne View Post
great post, sas!



did someone see CurlyEyes' post about being 12 when she joined here and have a freak-out?
Great cheerleader, rou!
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Old 03-22-2013, 06:53 PM   #17
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wild_sasparilla View Post
I am disgusted to see that thread locked. I remember a very similar thread a few years back about whether your first time hurt, and I found it very reassuring to read such an open discussion on the topic. It showed me a far more healthy attitude toward sex than the one I was presented IRL. I still haven't had my first time but threads like that one and others have been instrumental in teaching me stuff like how to discuss things openly with your partner and know when you're really ready, not to mention making details like how and why it sometimes hurts less taboo and thus less mysterious and scary.

That thread was clearly marked "adult," so properly supervised 12-year-olds would not end up in there anyway, and honestly, teens aren't even a large enough portion of Non-Hair to act like this board is frequented by children. Locking that thread says, "Sex is so dirty the very subject is tainted. Good girls don't ask questions or speak up about their fears. If you want to hear something more comforting than 'IT WILL HURT LIKE HELLFIRE AND YOU'LL GET AIDS AND DIE' then find it somewhere else." NC.com used to be a place where such disturbing messages weren't the only ones being sent. Not anymore, I guess.
a very good point! When I was twelve, my parents sat with me when I went on the internet and knew I was active on nc.com! (and anyway, I was too much of a goody-two-shoes scaredy cat to ever click on threads marked adult) so honestly, if kids have parents that aren't monitoring their internet usage, they'll find this stuff out eventually, and probably get incorrect/harmful information.
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Old 03-22-2013, 06:59 PM   #18
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I used to look at porn and cyber sex with strangers when I was 12. i turned out fine. I think nc.com is fine
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Old 03-22-2013, 07:03 PM   #19
 
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If I had started this thread complaining about another thread, I would have been banned.
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Old 03-22-2013, 07:25 PM   #20
 
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Lol
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