My preteen daughter has course, thick wavy hair that frizzes and tangles easily. She wants to straighten it and can't seem to manage the flat iron. Personally I think I don't have the best kind for her. She cries over her hair and the tangles! Too make matters worse she's coming to me for hair style advice and help and I am struggling bc I cant even style my hair and am hopeless in helping her. It's not her fault she has a non creative mom! Help! I would love hair care and tangling advice as well as a flat iron recommendation and finally any help on helping her style her hair is much appreciated!
I REALLY do not recommend she flat iron her hair, that's where a lot of people go wrong &end up with extreme heat damage.. What she needs is products that will help her detangle her hair and tame her frizz. Hopefully someone else will reply with good product recommendations for you. And go look on the 2b and 2c forums for tips, they really know a lot! &If your daughter decides to embrace her waves, the Curly Girl Method would be great for her (you can google it or look it up on here)!
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I have fine wavy hair but when I used a flat iron regularly, I ended up with broken hairs all over my head that stuck straight up and looked worse than frizz, so I flat ironed more to get those down and more broke and it was a vicious cycle. If she HAS to flat iron, make sure you use a ceramic flat iron and apply lots of some type of heat protectant first. This shouldn't be a daily occurrence either or else my guess is she will see bad effects within 1-2 months, at most. If you could encourage her to embrace the curls, she will be happier in the long run, with healthier hair and not having to fight the weather constantly (anytime it rains, snows, the wind blows the wrong way, that flat-ironed hair will frizz and curl). I am still growing out some of those little broken hairs. :angry4:
As for detangling, I have found that Kinky Curly Knot Today to be the absolute best detangler I have found. It's a light leave in condish that she can use to help prevent tangles throughout the day and/or can use as a conditioner for detangling in the shower.
I also don't recommend flat ironing often. I usually only do it once a month at most. Going CG (no sulfates and no silicones) has made my hair healthier and more manageable. Encourage her to embrace her waves rather than fighting them.
Here's just a few tips...
For tangles: use a conditioner with a lot of slip (I've heard Garnier Fructis Sleek & Shine is good; I use Tresemme Naturals) and use a wide tooth comb with the conditioner in the shower to remove tangles.
For frizz reduction: don't touch hair while it's drying, use an old t-shirt or microfiber towel to dry hair
Hope this helps!
I also have thick wavy hair that is a little on the coarse side, so let me share a few things that have helped wondrously with my frizz.
First off, I wouldn't recommend straightening it! I started straightening my hair when I was 13 (I'm almost 20 now) and if I hadn't fried my hair with extreme heat through my teen years, my hair would look a lot nicer now! As frustrating as it is to have frizzy hair, the dryness that heat styling causes is only going to make it worse. Not fun!
So that being said, here's my tips.
-Put product in while your hair is still soaking wet. A good frizz fighter for me is just a nice, simple gel with no silicones- I use LA Looks gel. A dime size amount for me is more than enough, any more and I get crunchy. The motion you use to put it in your hair should be not a finger-combing motion but more of a scrunch.
-Don't dry with a terry cloth towel, it makes your hair fuzzy and flattens your natural curl/wave patterns. An old t-shirt works very well.
-After you've put the product in, DO NOT TOUCH YOUR HAIR UNTIL IT'S DRY. That's probably the biggest thing that changed my hair completely, and you wouldn't even think it would make that much of a difference, but it does. The more you touch your hair, the more frizz you'll have, it's that simple.
-Try washing your hair every OTHER day instead of every day. If the hair's natural oils make their way down the shaft, it'll help hair be more moisturized and less frizzy.
I hope this helps, I know how much it sucks to be so frustrated with your hair as a preteen, when it seems to matter so much to have cute hair. Let us know how it goes!
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