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Old 03-30-2012, 09:31 PM   #21
 
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Default Are we high maintenance?

"So what exactly are you implying here? If taking care of oneself is considered as high maintenance then almost everyone is just that. Just because a person doesn't wear makeup or take over an hour to get ready it does not mean they look like garbage and that they do not care about how they look. That's just silly.

Many women who choose not to wear makeup, for example do so because they look better without it and they could also care less if others want to wear it. It seems to me that you have subtly taken a stab at people who naturally like to keep things simple because that's what works for them yet you yourself don't like it when someone does the same to you."

Um...I think you completely misunderstood what I was saying here. I did NOT mean to say that all people who didn't wear makeup don't care about their appearance. I meant more the ones who get all righteous about it and think that those of who DO stuff whether it's with our hair, makeup or anything else is "high maintenance". To each their own. I'm not going to explain any further here. End of my input on this subject.
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Old 03-30-2012, 10:14 PM   #22
 
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I don't necessarily think Caramix3a was taking a shot at people who don't wear makeup or take time on their appearance so much as just saying that taking time on your appearance isn't a silly, trivial thing to do and isn't a sign of stereotypical feminine weakness.

I think it's just as valid to spend an hour on your hair and an hour on your face every day as it is to wake up ten minutes before you have to leave, put on some clothes, shake your hair out, and go (and trust me, I have plenty of days like that!) and I bet most people here feel the same.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Touch.of.ink View Post
What I need to get over is the idea that if I'm spending time and attention on my hair, it's not "really" curly. I'm just making it curly by the things I'm doing to it
^ THIS FOR ME TOO. SERIOUSLY. I have to use sooooooo much product to make my waves separate out into individual s-curls (though I'm starting to like the way they're falling even with less product) that it's like "Oh ... I'm not really curly/wavy." I had an irrational fear of my best friend judging me for having curly hair products in my shower when she was staying with me, haha.

But my hair's sure not straight, doesn't really even do a very good impression of it if I brush it out, and it looks better and feels healthier with a CG routine, so this seems like the way to go.
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Old 04-01-2012, 06:09 PM   #23
 
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I agree with most of the other posters on here, in that I don't consider myself high-maintenance, and if someone else does consider what I do for my hair high-maintenance, I don't really mind. Compared to what I was doing before with my hair, I definitely spend more time and attention overall, but that's more because I want my hair to be healthy, look better, and take less time/energy when I chose to do it. As others have said, my hair is my hobby and I enjoy learning as much as I can about it.
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Old 04-01-2012, 07:35 PM   #24
 
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Ehhh I don't consider wearing my hair wavy to be high maintenance. Once I finish showering, I only spend a couple minutes scrunching in products and the rest of the time is plopping. I also do other things while my hair is in a plop like get dressed, make my lunch, eat breakfast, etc.

If anything, it probably takes people longer to blow dry and straighten!
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Old 04-01-2012, 08:14 PM   #25
 
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Exactly! When I was straightening my hair every day it took me a total of 2 hours to wash,blow dry and flat iron along with getting dressed. And it still looked frizzy. Now it takes about 45 minutes to get ready for work.
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Old 04-02-2012, 09:57 AM   #26
 
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Whew, I thought my 15 or so minutes of hair styling gave me "high-ish" maintenance hair! Guess this is a very subjective thing. I can fix my hair in the time it takes to make old-fashioned oatmeal!!!
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Old 04-02-2012, 09:59 AM   #27
 
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IAgirl....I'm jealous of you and your 15 minute hairstyle time. Ha ha. The diffusing takes me the longest...after that it's just the remaining dry time. I'll trade ya!
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Old 04-02-2012, 11:26 AM   #28
 
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Default Feeling like a curly fraud

Quote:
Originally Posted by amandamarie View Post
^ THIS FOR ME TOO. SERIOUSLY. I have to use sooooooo much product to make my waves separate out into individual s-curls (though I'm starting to like the way they're falling even with less product) that it's like "Oh ... I'm not really curly/wavy." I had an irrational fear of my best friend judging me for having curly hair products in my shower when she was staying with me, haha.
Yes! There's a part of me (you know, the evil voice self critic) that says, "You don't really have wavy/curly hair. If you did, you wouldn't need to use any product. People are secretly laughing at you for pretending to be curly/wavy."

I love your point about not having straight hair. Because I also clearly don't have straight hair and never did. What I had was a mom with straight hair that was always telling me (with the best of intentions) to brush my hair So I had frizzy hair.

Now I have wavy and curly hair, with product and styling knowledge
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Old 04-02-2012, 07:58 PM   #29
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Touch.of.ink View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by amandamarie View Post
^ THIS FOR ME TOO. SERIOUSLY. I have to use sooooooo much product to make my waves separate out into individual s-curls (though I'm starting to like the way they're falling even with less product) that it's like "Oh ... I'm not really curly/wavy." I had an irrational fear of my best friend judging me for having curly hair products in my shower when she was staying with me, haha.
Yes! There's a part of me (you know, the evil voice self critic) that says, "You don't really have wavy/curly hair. If you did, you wouldn't need to use any product. People are secretly laughing at you for pretending to be curly/wavy."

I love your point about not having straight hair. Because I also clearly don't have straight hair and never did. What I had was a mom with straight hair that was always telling me (with the best of intentions) to brush my hair So I had frizzy hair.

Now I have wavy and curly hair, with product and styling knowledge
I know what you mean! It's not that my hair even has all that much more wave in it, I don't think; more like, it's more consistent and defined and less poufy. But in my mind, there are "real" curlies/wavies (the ones who have curls no matter what) and then imposters. And I feel like an imposter sometimes.

But it's pretty irrational, because like I said, if I don't have wavy hair, what do I have? Just awkward bendy hair, I guess.
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Old 04-03-2012, 12:39 PM   #30
 
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Amandamarie and touch.of.ink, you need to see this thread: Spin off thread: The wavy imposter, it is not just you.
And maybe this: science-y hair blog: More Wavy Physics
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Old 04-03-2012, 07:19 PM   #31
 
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Oh my goodness! Wavy imposter syndrome! This is almost as wonderful as when I found out everyone else was just pretending to feel like a grownup too! Thanks, IAgirl.
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Favorite products: Kinky-Curly Knot Today, Kinky-Curly Curling Custard, Curl Junkie Curls in a Bottle, Curl Junkie Curl Rehab, Curl Junkie Curl Assurance Smoothing Lotion, Shea Moisture Curl and Style Milk, homemade flaxseed gel.

Still looking for a cleanser I like.
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Old 04-03-2012, 08:00 PM   #32
 
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I am definitely not high maintenance. I am, in fact, a minimalist, so the goals of my styling regimen are keeping it short and simple as possible. One product (gel), three minutes of scrunching, let dry, scrunch out crunch an hour later. Compared to the hour-long heat session I'd need for straight hair, it's quite wonderful.
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Old 04-03-2012, 11:49 PM   #33
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IAgirl View Post
Amandamarie and touch.of.ink, you need to see this thread: Spin off thread: The wavy imposter, it is not just you.
And maybe this: science-y hair blog: More Wavy Physics
Awesome thread, thank you! And I love the More Wavy Physics post, too. I read it a week or so ago (along with a lot of other great posts there), and promptly subscribed to your blog (as Suzi McGowen).
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Old 04-04-2012, 05:44 AM   #34
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IAgirl View Post
Whew, I thought my 15 or so minutes of hair styling gave me "high-ish" maintenance hair! Guess this is a very subjective thing. I can fix my hair in the time it takes to make old-fashioned oatmeal!!!
Wow I'm jealous!!! Wish it took me this long..washing, styling and dryin takes me.. 45ish minutes and sometimes more. Guess that's what I get for having such long hair

I would say yes. I am high maintenance and I actually don't care that I am. I just like to take my time in getting ready and doing things just right. (make up, hair, clothes, shoes) At the moment my hair is braided everyday so people are astonished when I'm ready in 20 minutes rather than the hour or more it would usually take
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Old 05-11-2012, 02:27 AM   #35
 
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Who cares if others think you are high maintenance? Aren't you the one doing the maintaining? It's your time, your hair, and YOU who feel beautiful because you do it. If they mean it as a put down well then, they need to mind their own business. People judge too darn much. Your hair in the pic is BEAUTIFUL---maintain away!
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Old 05-11-2012, 02:39 AM   #36
 
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Your hair in the pic looks a lot like mine. Mine was a tad longer but I cut about 5-6 inches off the back yesterday. Just couldn't stand the stringy ends anymore---am recovering from a HUGE hair loss. Now it's about the same length as your pic (is that called the avatar?---I'm a brand newbie), but red. I don't know what my hair loves yet but, I have ordered some flax seed (golden) and jojoba oil and will mix up the FSG and use a jojoba mixed with other oils to deep condition.

Would you like to be my hair twin?
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Have begun the CG process as of May, 2012 and have already gotten my hair from a frizzy 2b-sometimes 2c to a 3a. YAY!!!!:
Tried Wen----made my hair frizzy, but SOFT! Am now using As I Am as a co-wash and Leave-in, and Curls Unleashed Shine and Define Mousse, as well as Plopping. I can't believe my curls are coming back!!!!




Last edited by naturalily; 05-11-2012 at 02:49 AM. Reason: newbie mess-ups
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Old 05-11-2012, 01:19 PM   #37
 
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Im hella high maintenence and so is my hair. Proud of it. Everyone's hair is different. Im just glad Ive learned my hair well enough to know how to maintain it and keep it looking good. I do the steps that I notice my hair doesnt do as well if I skip like a dc after a shampoo. If I need 5 steps compared to someone's 3 or 10 steps who cares? I dont judge. Do you.
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Old 05-11-2012, 10:16 PM   #38
 
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My hair is definitely a hobby for me. I do spend time on it, but it's something I enjoy now, if I spent over an hour straightening and destroying my hair, that might be considered high maintenance....
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Old 05-12-2012, 10:09 AM   #39
 
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My hair is the kind of hair that has to be 'done' to look good. That's OK, 'cause when it's done it is apparently enviable, I get a lot of attention for it. But if I don't manage it with gel and so on, it really just looks like a tumbleweed. I see people who have my hair and aren't doing it and it doesn't look good.

And I look OK without makeup but can look much better painted, I'm pretty good at doing the makeup and so far it still does work - not sure how this will play out as i get older, but for now makeup looks better than none.

So yeah, I do kind of think my look requires maintainence. But I'll maintain it and at least hair does do something nice without having to be permed or straightened or anything, and I don't need surgeries to look good, LOL. because I 'clean up alright'.

And *really* I think high maintainence is the ladies who get their hair and nails done every week and buy clothes and shoes all the time, and lots of massages and spa visits, fancy cars and so on. I don't think that just doing your hair and makeup and getting dressed in the morning qualifies you as high maintainence.
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Old 05-12-2012, 12:14 PM   #40
 
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As a curly girl I have fought my hair most of my 50 plus years. It is a part of life, and not something I would have chosen for myself. I still wish I had straight hair!

People with straight hair can pretty much cleanse and go. I have always envied them. To me straight hair is low maintanence and curls are high maintenance. curls simply take more time. I have thin hair and am a 3A. My hair has to be dry before I go anywhere. Weather effects everything. People with straight hair just don't have those problems.

Curly is high maintenance!
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