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-   -   Any Mixed/ curly girls with this problem? (http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/general-discussion-about-curly-hair/152684-any-mixed-curly-girls-problem.html)

MixedGoldiLocks 12-07-2012 07:38 AM

Any Mixed/ curly girls with this problem?
 
Hi eveyone. Sooo, i recently started wearing my hair curly a lot because i just turned 13, & wanted something different . :) my curls are 3c with some 3b. All my friends in my neighborhood are some how fascinated with it. They all want to pet my head and rake their fingers through the curls >.< most of them are mixed race too, so you'd think that seeing curly hair wouldnt be such a big deal, but its annoying having people & sometimes strangers wanting to put their hands in it or make remarks like why is it so curly? Does it do that on its own or do you so somethig to it? No no, like when you come out the
Shower is it like that? And they dont even ask to touch it >.< does anyone else have this problem? Because after this, the race questions come up & to me its a little uncormfortable :/ please help!!
Xoxo , Goldi Locks

GoddessCurls 12-07-2012 10:44 AM

Well...I'm a bit older than u...I think they know better now that to just touch my hair..lol

When I was ur age my family (mostly white) always loved my hair and wanted me to leave it curly. It was such a hassle to deal with cause is so super-duper curly it tangles so easy. I also didnt know how to deal with it then. I relaxed and straightened. I didn't leave it curly till like 27. Maybe pull away some when people go to touch ur hair...or say no..u'll mess it up.

Luvmycurls3 12-07-2012 11:16 AM

Poor baby. My daughter told me she has the same problem. She also is 13. Her hair is 3a in front and a combo of 3b&c throughout the rest of her hair. The kids at school and in the neighborhood loves to touch her hair and ask her race. She says it's worse when the kids see me. We are African American. Just have type 3 hair with multicolored eyes. I tell her to move when they try to touch her hair and let them know that they can't touch her hair. That's really all you can do.

MixedGoldiLocks 12-07-2012 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luvmycurls3 (Post 2082121)
Poor baby. My daughter told me she has the same problem. She also is 13. Her hair is 3a in front and a combo of 3b&c throughout the rest of her hair. The kids at school and in the neighborhood loves to touch her hair and ask her race. She says it's worse when the kids see me. We are African American. Just have type 3 hair with multicolored eyes. I tell her to move when they try to touch her hair and let them know that they can't touch her hair. That's really all you can do.

Yeah! Thats another thing! My hair is light brown & blonde , my eyes are greenish, but my skin is caramel so race comes up all the time :(

Luvmycurls3 12-07-2012 07:53 PM

It's ok sweetie. Some ppl just don't know any better and that happens all through life no matter how old you are. Just move when they try to touch your hair and ignore it. And smile.

Korkscrew 12-07-2012 08:07 PM

People are naturally curious and some of them don't think before reaching to touch curly hair (or even body parts). (For the record, I think this happens to a lot of curlies and coilies who aren't mixed, too). You can let people know you feel uncomfortable. Tell them you don't want your hair touched when they see you reaching to touch it.

The other thing you mentioned - that neverending "What are you?" question - is trickier because people may keep asking you that a lot even once you're a lot older. I still get that question constantly as an adult. Constantly. If you don't feel like answering that, don't. You can walk away, remain silent or simply change the subject. Another thing I've done is, instead of answering, ask them the same question ... "What are you?" Once they've answered, change the subject.

One thing I try to remember is that this kind of attention can often be a form of flattery. I mean, the person found you interesting enough to tug on your hair, or ask you a pointed question about yourself. So try not to get too upset, if you can help it.

GoddessCurls 12-07-2012 09:07 PM

I've kinda seen it as a form of flattery. I mean when I was little any attention I got was positive so it doesn't really bother me.

Luvmycurls3 12-08-2012 10:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Korkscrew (Post 2082392)
People are naturally curious and some of them don't think before reaching to touch curly hair (or even body parts). (For the record, I think this happens to a lot of curlies and coilies who aren't mixed, too). You can let people know you feel uncomfortable. Tell them you don't want your hair touched when they see you reaching to touch it.

The other thing you mentioned - that neverending "What are you?" question - is trickier because people may keep asking you that a lot even once you're a lot older. I still get that question constantly as an adult. Constantly. If you don't feel like answering that, don't. You can walk away, remain silent or simply change the subject. Another thing I've done is, instead of answering, ask them the same question ... "What are you?" Once they've answered, change the subject.

One thing I try to remember is that this kind of attention can often be a form of flattery. I mean, the person found you interesting enough to tug on your hair, or ask you a pointed question about yourself. So try not to get too upset, if you can help it.

I agree. Well said.

Korkscrew 12-09-2012 10:45 PM

Thanks ;) I know being different can come with it's challenges at times. This may sound a little hollow or cliche, but handling this type of stuff often gets easier as you get older :angel10:


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