Weird thing about my hair

I am a 2c/3a in spots and I have noticed something. When I watch some of the girls videos on here, yall have curly hair from the minute that you step out of the shower in a matter of speaking. Mine is straight as a stick when I get done washing, and the minute that I take the plop off it is curly and then a few minutes later the hair goes slightly bendy. When it dries, it draws back up into a curl again. Is there something that I am doing wrong?
I co wash with Vidal Sassoon Color Protect Conditioner throw a bit of the Nothing But Curly CO Wash on for a leave in sometimes but tonight I didn't do that. I use CK as my curl gel which I just ran out of tonight but I have a trial size bottle of Ouidad Climate Control Humidity Gel so I can use that. I do a plop for a few minutes and then I take it down, put a bit of Garnier Fructis Leave in Smoothing stuff and then plop back up.
I am ordering some different products this week, because I have extremely thick hair. I can detangle my hair in the shower, when it is dry it is tangled again. I haven't used a hair brush in years. I dont use one at all even when I roll my hair. I actually threw my brush against the wall the other day when I got mad.
My husband used it but since he cut his hair off, and won't allow me to fix it for him I figured he didn't need the brush either so it worked out well. I think that maybe some lighter products would work, maybe stuff for fine hair because its made lighter and won't flatten my hair down? I am unsure about these things, I have looked over the website and there is so much information and I have learned about plopping and pineapples.
I have seen a difference in my hair over the past month but I just cant seem to figure out why it is straight when its wet and then shrinks when it dries. It doesn't even look like I am a curly headed person at all when my hair is wet. I have seen pictures of girls who have that crinkly curly look but I feel like I am posing as a curly girl LOL.
Should I just change products? I mean my hair has always done that, but I am wondering if I am using the wrong things to get my hair to shrink up.I dont care about shrink myself, I wouldnt mind if I looked like Shirley Temple. I also wonder if I might should cut some of the bottom of my hair off as bad as I don't really want to cut my hair. In the past six months, I have bleached my hair once. I dyed it back a natural color dark blonde, dyed it red because I wanted to go back pink and then used a veggie dye to get to Magenta Pink. After every single dye job, I condition and moisture like a madwoman. I also use the lowest volume developer possible so I don't damage my hair as much. I have a chubby face and a real short haircut wouldn't look really good. Not to mention it is almost to my bra strap right now and I hate to chop it all off. I was thinking maybe just working through this odd length waiting until it grows a bit more and just trimming until the damage is gone but the hair isnt damaged but I know that under this veggie dye is processed hair. My hair is in really good condition, I take excellent care of it. I was using Miracle 7 sulfate/paraben/and that other stuff free shampoo because it seemed to really help my hair to spring up some. Maybe my hair needs a shampoo of sorts? Maybe I need that low poo stuff? Help ladies and curly gents if there are any out there....
My hair used to be like that. Some people get curlier as they get longer and for others they have to cut it to have curls pop more. Regardless it may just be how you style your hair. When my hair is wet I don't look like a cg either haha. Don't worry its just your hair type-we're not posers lmao. Anyway try using a mousse or experiment with different methods. Maybe the pixie curl method with a diffuser could work. I don't thing your cg? Do you use cones in moderation or something? Cause most people with your type can get away with low poo's. My hair is tangly as well but I find my fingers work best ( I do have a bunch of combs and just recently got a tangle teezer). Lol my tangle teezer kinda just sits there in its glittery purple glory but I hear ya cause I don't use the damned thing. But yeah experiment with other things. That doesn't mean you have to break the bank though if your on a budget. I also feel like you may be adding too much moisture? Like I feel like your hair won't need as much because you seem to be trying to create more curl/volume. I think the garnier leave in etc. Might be ruining it but idk.

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Sometimes I get carried away and manipulate him too much. He tells me he's fine on his own but I never listen. I wash him less now and all in all we're happy.
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BC #2: 10/2/13
2c/3a/3b w/ loose botticellis, whirls and curls,
Coarse, High Porosity;CG since 2007
The water is weighing your hair down! Also, people with tighter curl patterns are always curlier when wet. This is not a problem at all. My hair is slightly wavy when soaking wet, but curls into a strong 3a pattern. Don't stress because your hair doesn't look like everyone else's. That's just silly. You might have finer strands as well.

3a, med strand thickness, high density, low porosity
CG since April 2012
BC October 2012
Cleanser: CJ Daily Fix
RO Conditioner: Mop Top Daily Conditioner
Leave In: As I Am leave in or KCKT
Stylers: FSG and Curlisto Control II Gel
Sealer: Pure Argan Oil

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