I currently alternate each day between shampooing my hair with relatively natural and ph balanced yet commercial conditioning shampoo and washing it only with water. Even though I do not blow-dry my hair and only iron my bangs, using shampoo, even the conditioning kind, every day gave me split ends, made my hair look grayish or gave me unwanted highlights, made it tangled and frizzy, increased the amount of flyaway frizzies, and irritated my skin on my face. Even the most natural brands will produce a noticeable amount of irritation. People I know would even ask me what happened to my skin and it took days for my skin to recover after switching to another hair washing regimen.

This regimen has had its own issues as well. I first tried using a bathing cap with my hair tied in a bun every other day, however this did not prevent my hair from humidity, which would undo every beneficial effect of hair pomades or styling techniques I would use after my hair was soaked from shampooing. Furthermore, since I wash my face in the shower, my hair would get wet anyways and I feel gross if I come out of the shower without my face and hair at least soaked and rinsed with water, even though I am more flexible with my cleaning regimens for hair and face than with the rest of my body. Also, without the thorough face rinse which is much more efficient in the shower, my skin also gets irritated, so I figured if my hair is going to get wet anyways, why not just wash it or at least rinse it?

I eventually switched to the hair cleaning routine mentioned above, however this has also had a few issues. First of all, my hair feels weighed down after just rinsing it with water without removing buildup and this has been more noticeable than the benefits it has on improving damaged hair. However, I still continue this because it has been kinder to my skin, which gets irritated only every other day instead of every day. My hair oscillates between being to oily and too dry and this causes most issues with it. The mineral content of the water could also possibly lead to buildup which has to be washed out. The result is that it looks not only weighed down but stringy, in contrast to having well hydrated defined curls.

Equally frustrating is the fact that applying curl defining creams, relatively natural brands, which help it look nice and less frizzy, without shampooing, makes it look greasy and if I rinse my hair without reapplying the cream, all of its benefits are undone. I use these hair pomades not only to get rid of frizz but also because my hair is both frizzy and shapeless with different strands having different textures even though everything is the same length. It also sometimes has this "in between" texture especially when it gets either too oily or too dry which just looks bizarre instead of interesting or pretty. I have also noticed that sometimes it has bizarre textures and shapes which I could not even describe. Having a more defined shape also makes it less frizzy, so I would rather not give up using some kind of after showering cream.

What is so bizarre however is that on some days it looks perfectly fine with minimal effort, although this has not been consistent. This is what makes me think the imbalance between too much oil and extreme dryness causes most of my problems with my hair.

Everything would also be easier if my skin was not so sensitive. I have been tested for allergies, yet I do not have any allergies I am aware of. I described all of the reactions my skin has to most products, which is why I cannot use makeup either and the dermatologist told me everything was "fine" and gave my this shampoo that supposedly is gentle to your skin yet made no difference.

I have considered the following solutions - 1. using "old fashioned" hair washing with just liquid soap (only for hair) diluted with an equal amount of water each day, assuming this would create less dryness and irritation or 2. staying with my old shampoo and just using small portions on my scalp and hair roots on the days I do not lather it fully.

The major issue with the second option is that the constant use of shampoo on my scalp and roots will also cause skin irritation, sometimes even from just being near my face without touching it.

The issue with the second option is that I have heard the alkalinity of liquid soaps may contribute more to damaging hair than to restoring it. Someone suggested to me applying a bit of coconut oil or something similar to my scalp 30 minutes before showering and using the liquid soap, could protect against loss of sebum. However, if it does not absorb fast enough it could either prevent my roots and scalp from being washed well or would require me to use more shampoo, which would defeat the purpose and really bother my skin.

I could do much more experimenting and searches, yet I do not have the time and just want some practical advice without someone trying to sell things.