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Old 04-16-2007, 04:50 PM   #1
 
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Default My beautiful curly neice hates her hair! :(

Hi everyone,

I've just been to visit my sister. My sister's daughters are mixed race, their dad is black, of African descent, and they all have afro hair, all different. They are, and I speak without family bias (well, without too much bias ) the most beautiful girls I have ever seen. The eldest is growing up as gorgeous as any supermodel, and a beautiful personality to go with it. The trouble is, she is 13, and she loaths her hair. She has been picked on so much about it, and her daily mood is dictated by the fact that she is a curly. She had TR a couple of years ago, which, although it looked lovely, didn't help her love her curls, and, if anything, made her hate it more now its regrown. She slaps it down, ties it up, wears hats all the time, anything to hide her hair. It doesnt help that my sis is more or less a straightie, but straightens and moans that her hair is kinky etc.

Do any of you wonderful ladies know of a nice website with inspiration for young black girls? aAn you help me to show her that her hair can be cute and modern and hip, or any links to pics of young girls with big curls? She saw my new CG look and was very impressed at how much better it looks now, so there's a start. I am going to give her the CG book.

I want to borrow her for a month and educate her but its just not possible! :x

Heres hoping you can help

Liz xx
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Old 04-16-2007, 05:30 PM   #2
 
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Send her here! I'm sure she'll get some great advice from all the beautiful curlies on this board.

It's really a shame that she doesn't like her hair...maybe she'll grow to love it in time.
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Old 04-16-2007, 05:37 PM   #3
 
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Thanks for the reply, I really wish she had the internet at home, I asked her if she ever got online and she said, almost never!

The trouble is that, she doesnt have any positive curly role models ( I live too far away to hold any influence really). Mummy is a straighty who hates even the very light wave in her own hair, and they dont really see her dads family, so she doesnt get a lot of positive feedback about her hair.
This place would be so good for her! *frustration*

I'm considering hunting the forums for some positive posts and printing them out for her

Liz x
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Old 04-16-2007, 05:51 PM   #4
 
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Edited due to a cyberstalker. Sorry, guys.

Last edited by Koukla72; 02-12-2009 at 05:50 PM.
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Old 04-17-2007, 05:38 AM   #5
 
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You could buy her the Curly Girl book.
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Old 04-17-2007, 07:48 AM   #6
 
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Your niece is going through alot.. Puberty coupled with being different is going to give her some self esteem issues. <Hugs for your niece>

My children are bi-racial also, but being African-American gives me an edge with taking care of their hair. I'm sure that your sister means well, but she probably isn't that familiar with how to take care of curly hair.

OK, now for some advice..

Your niece probably will not want to go CG. Not shampooing her hair would make her that much more different than her peers, and if she ever mentioned to them that she had stopped shampooing, she would be open to much more criticism.

I'd recommend that you talk to her about cutting back to shampooing once a week, and rinsing in the shower in between. Then you could become her favorite relative by buying her some hair-appropriate products. Also, explain to her how curly hair should be treated (wet-combing only, no rubbing with a towel, etc.).

Because she is bi-racial, I'm assuming that she has 3b/3c hair that is probably spongy (holds alot of water). I'd recommend products by Curls or Blended Beauty for her hair.

Good luck!
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Old 04-17-2007, 02:36 PM   #7
 
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Thanks for the responses everyone.

Thankyou so much for the advice kdreigh, I see what you mean about not washing making her more different, I didn't think about that. Her area is populated with more white people than any other race, and her "friends" are less than complimentary already, giving her comments like "sort your hair!", and some even make nasty remarks about her nose shape, and full lips! Some friends!

Her hair tends more towards 3c, very tight little curls, and her hair itself is so fine, spidersilk-like, and fragile. She is very lucky to have uniform curls all over her head, perfect, like they have been made with an iron. It will look amazing if she can treat it right. She is desperate for long hair, but her hair grows very slowly, and the tight curls steal the precious length!

Thanks for the recommendations, I'll try to get hold of some of those products for her to try, I am determined to take her under my wing, us curlies must stick together!

Liz x
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Old 04-17-2007, 02:55 PM   #8
 
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Zeldagoblin,

I forgot to mention that you can get samples of both product lines from www.sistasplace.biz.

Keep us posted!
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